okay so i am a marine stationed in baghdad and my sister is the only family i keep in contact with and i love her with all my heart shes my baby sister and id do anything to protect her. while ive been over here she started dating this guy that i dont know. i was supposed to beflying home to see her on friday and they changed plans and im going to be here for another year before i can go home... when she found out that i wasnt going to make it home to see her she told me that shes engaged to this guy but shes not going to marry him until i come home because she wants me to walk her down the isle cuz her and our father dont get along. but my problem is that i dont trust this guy and i dont want her to get hurt. so i dont know if i should cut my contract and go home to figure this **** out or stay here like she wants me to...? HELP ME PLEASE IF U HAVE SUGGESTIONS OR WANT MORE INFO SEND ME AN INSTANT MESSAGE.. PLEASE HELP
2006-08-14 11:19:14 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Hey! You're a Marine, right? You must have some buddies in the U.S. who can check out this guy. Get someone to run a check on him. Heck, they can even strike up a conversation and buy him a beer to find out what he's really like.
2006-08-14 11:24:14 · answer #1 · answered by Otis F 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you can do is have her wait until you get back, by then she'll probably figure out whether the guy is a loser or not. If you go home now she'll probably just rush to the wedding. Besides it isn't the end of the world, no it isn't good but you'll be home to help her get out of it later on. Everyone is going to get hurt in life, just make sure she doesn't get knocked up, that way the end of the relationship can really be the end of it and she can pick up where she left off. Besides you have no evidence that he's a bad guy.
2006-08-14 18:34:54 · answer #2 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever you do just don't make her choose not to get married by saying something like i don't approve. The best way to calm your fears is to ask innocent questions about this guy. If you know his name then do an online background check on him. This will run you about twenty dollars. Use what you find out about him to your sisters advantage.I know that we older siblings always want whats best for our younger siblings but the reality is that if she is grown she can choose to do whatever she wants whenever she wants, our job as older siblings is to always be there for them no matter what. And hey keeping tabs on her future husband can only help the situation not hurt it. Believe me it's better to keep contact with a loved one. You should never let anyone or anything come in between the two of you. Good luck and i do hope that everything turns out well.
2006-08-14 18:35:52 · answer #3 · answered by chillingmona 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go with what your sister is saying. She is waiting to be married for a year until you get home, that shows love right there. Is there a reason you don't like the guy? You are so far away, try to come home with an open mind and see the guy for yourself. As long as you are always there for your sister, she will always trust you. Good luck.
2006-08-14 18:24:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congrats on being your typical big brother. Hats off to you. However if your sister is truly in love she will wait for your return. If you don't trust this guy tell her your feelings, my older sis never knew anything about her ex husband because we didn't want to break her heart, now they have have been seperated for 4 yrs and she still has a hard time knowing that we hide the fact. Good luck and stay safe
2006-08-14 18:32:21 · answer #5 · answered by jamie s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is willing to wait until you come home that's a good thing. it will give her time of her own to see the good or bad in this guy. If you try to influence her one way or the other it may backfire on you. Push her away from him, she will be that much more determined to be with him. Push her toward him and she may resent you if things don't work out. For now, stay where you are as she told you. If this is meant to be, it will be. Good luck, and thank you for what you are doing for the rest of us! God bless
2006-08-18 15:29:04 · answer #6 · answered by mamajo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you make me miss my big brother so much I'm not sure what you should do but i feel like giving you a hug hang in there listen to you're gut this is you're little sister and you guys have a bond my big brother always knows when i need him and like magic hes here if shes in trouble you will feel it in you're bones
2006-08-14 18:28:58 · answer #7 · answered by angelina_mcardle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is her life and her choice. Even if it is a mistake we are all allowed to make those and learn from them.
You do what is right for you , but you give her space to do what is right for her too.
2006-08-14 18:23:42 · answer #8 · answered by yeller 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might qualify for a leave of absence for this one. let them know that you are the person who helps take care of your sister and that she really needs you.
2006-08-14 18:53:25 · answer #9 · answered by michiganwife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋