I really want to ask someone out, however, I am self consious because I consider myself to be unattractive. But I have a pretty good personality. I mean, I'm kinda funny and always nice. But I'm worried because of the way I look. What should I do?
2006-08-14 10:21:59 · 42 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Do you know this other person you want to ask out? If so, go with your gut feelings on whether or not they like you. I personally don't go for looks, I prefer personallity ALL the way. Yeah you have to be attracted to the person for things to work out...but personality is the key. If you do not know this person just talk to them casually first, without blurting out you want to ask them out. Then maybe work in, hey wanna get lunch or dinner sometime? Or if you guys are talking about movies, find out which one they would like to see and say "hey I really want to see that too! Would you like to go see it with me?" It won't be so hard, and will be like hanging out more than a date. Go from there! Good luck!
p.s. Don't let them know you are selfconcious,...ppl find that HIGHLY unattractive. Believe you are and you will be!
2006-08-14 10:28:38 · answer #1 · answered by celestial_fantasia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to build up your self confidence! and remember, as much as its been said, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Everyone likes something different. You already know what qualities you have to offer to a girl but think of more things you have to offer. Just go for it. Ask this girl out, just ask her to watch a movie or just to spend some time, things should work out from there. In the case that things don't work out then there's nothing you can do, except to find someone else who feels the same way you do about them. Im sure you'll find the right girl.
2006-08-14 10:29:29 · answer #2 · answered by GC 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dan,
Don't sell yourself short. Not all women look for the handsome-out-of-this-world man. I would rather date a guy who is nice, funny and has a great personality. In saying that...I am not available I am married.
When I married my husband, I found out through the grapevine that my best friend was telling people that I couldn't done much better than HIM! When I confronted her with this...she didn't deny it. I told her that I fell in love with his personality and his heart.
Look at Dr. Phil...he's isn't handsome...but his personality and his intelligence makes him a hottie.
I'm sure you have other qualities that make you handsome...don't ever sell yourself short.
Now go and ask that girl out. And if she rejects you...just take it and move on. But don't give up.
Good Luck.
2006-08-14 10:32:05 · answer #3 · answered by Wanna-be-Dear-Abby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen, I know you've heard it a million and one times but it's so important that you see how true it is. If this girl turns you down because you're not a walking aphrodisiac, she doesn't DESERVE you. And you definitely don't want someone who judges so harshly on outside appearance. Wait for that someone who will see the funny good guy inside, the one in a million personality that you have, and love you for it. And don't ever ever feel ashamed of how you look. You're only ever given one life and one body to go through it, you should just accept the way you look and find things that you like about yourself. Don't be unhappy because you don't think you're good enough. You are. And I promise that you will find someone who will love you just the way you are.
If you really are extremely concerned, grooming makes all the difference. Be clean and nice-smelling and look polished and put-together. Girls LOVE guys who take pride in their appearance and take care of themselves, and no, it's not only for gay guys.
So ask this girl out. What do you have to lose? Maybe just your respect for her if she turns you down because she doesn't like the way you look. And let me tell you I've been attracted to dozens of guys who aren't the best looking, but I loved how nicely they treated me and how funny and kind and considerate they were.
I wish you all the best :)
2006-08-14 10:34:37 · answer #4 · answered by La 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And I know it's easier said than done but have a little self-confidence. Not everybody is so shallow as to care only about looks. And those are the ones you really want to meet anyway. Do you really want to know someone that only cares about how you look?
2006-08-14 10:31:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know, there's only so much you can do about your looks. You can change the way you dress, you can work out to improve your physique, but really, unless you get into plastic surgery, there's only so much that you can do. Unless you plan on living your life alone because you are too self conscious to ask a girl out, you need to just ask the girl out and take what comes your way. there's only 2 possible outcomes....either she says no, or she says yes. You've got a 50/50 chance. I am not the best looking guy either, and here's a story that will give you hope. When I was in my 20's I hung out at a particular night club every weekend. One Friday night, it was packed....that night I saw the most stunning woman I had ever seen...she was unbelievably gorgeous. I watched most every guy in the place hit on her or ask her to dance. She was turning everyone down....even the really studly looking guys. I had mentioned to my friend over and over how beautiful I thought that girl was, and of course he agreed. He suggested I go and ask her out or ask her to dance. For the same reasons you are afraid to ask this girl out, I was afraid to even talk to this girl....I mean, if the best looking guys in the place were getting shot down, what chance did I have? Well, I was obsessed with her all night....By a fluke she ended up at my table talking with a friend of hers who happened to be at my table (it was a big table and her friend wasn't with me and my friend). after about a half hour I just decided to go for it....I started small talk, and found she was very friendly...we talked a long time....finally I asked her if she wanted to go out with me sometime. She hesitated, and said...I don't know, what would we do? For some reason that irritated me that she didn't either say yes or no, but I don't know......I just chuckled and said oh come on....I just asked you to go out...I didn't ask you to marry me. She laughed and said yes, she would go out with me.....we ended up becoming engaged. We didn't end up staying together...but we were together 3 years before we broke up. So you just never know unless you go for it. Just do it. The worse that can happen is she says no. But....she might say yes. If you don't ask....your chance of going out with her is zero. so....either never go out with her because you don't ask and always wonder whether she would have said yes.....or ask and find out one way or the other. You may end up surprised like I was. Good luck....I hope it works out for you.
2006-08-14 10:45:48 · answer #6 · answered by typicalguy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never worry about the way you look if your a good person thats all that should matter and if the person you like doesn't like you back they don't deserve you. Go out and find someone who will like you for you. You will find them don't worry.
2006-08-14 10:38:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you love her/him ask her/him on a date, or ask for their number. And then maybe like after 2 or 3 dates it will be a real heart-filled love. And maybe after 6 or 7 dates you may get your first KISS. I know that you think two or three dtaes is a long time, but after one date it's not a real love; You know??? And I know you think six or seven dates is a long time, but it will also (AGAIN) take a long time for a kiss. And it's pretty easy to tell u this- It will take longer for you to date then it is to kiss. I hope you get what i'm saying.
2006-08-14 10:28:59 · answer #8 · answered by timmyodea@sbcglobal.net 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dudeee, im a girl,who is not a ***** or always looking for the hot guy.i like a guy who can just be funny and joke around.and be really nice.thats great. and i would just say take a chance. sometimes it matters about your looks, and sometimes it doesnt, it just depends on how people think. if you have a good funny personality, i do as well. just ask her out. see how it goes.just dont worry.go with it. and just ask her.
2006-08-14 10:28:27 · answer #9 · answered by rosi k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it depends on what the girl ure wanting to ask out likes cus if she likes u for the way u look then dont give her a chance but if she likes you for youre personality then give her a shot
as for your self consious thing dont put ure self down cus thatll just make you unattractive i never like a guy who put himself down
but if i did i would build his self esteem
2006-08-14 10:27:35 · answer #10 · answered by joanna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋