I have tried everything. I know he just cares about me. But if I do something that makes him mad he stops talking to me for weeks. I'm old enough and responsible anough to make my own desions. I have been on my own for two years now and I am doing just fine. But I really just want to live my life the way I want to. But if there is something I want to do and I know that It would make him mad I won't do it. Or I ask him first. I'm tired of it. So what do I do?
2006-08-14 07:29:26 · 7 answers · asked by Hugs and Kisses 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Stop living your life looking for approval other than your own. If you do something right it's yours, if you do something wrong, it's also yours. He can try to make you feel bad by refusing to talk to you (sad display of manipulation) or he can choose to accept you. That's his choice, right or wrong, and he has to own that, not you.
2006-08-14 07:38:11 · answer #1 · answered by t79a 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is all part of growing up. You might want to sit down with Dad and talk to him about your feelings and listen to what he has to say too. Communication is a two way street.
You may have to agree to disagree and move on. Sounds like he or you get your feelings hurt or pissed off and then go on speaking strikes but always seem to come around. Quite personally I think that is high school stuff but that is your way of dealing with it. It is time for both you and Dad to grow up and realize that you each have to make your own decisions and he can always say i told you so if you were wrong and you can always say he was right if you were wrong and he will still be there to pick up the pieces and hug you if you fail or hopefully succeed.
I am sure your Dad has made mistakes and will continue to do so. That's life. Ain't it great!!
2006-08-14 07:41:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, how old are you? If you're younger than 18 or 20, why have you been on your own for 2 years? I bet you're still in your teens or else you wouldn't be asking your question.
Obviously, you're only telling your side of the story, so it's very hard to say anything of consequence to help you without knowing what kind of father-daughter relationship you two had before you were on your own and now.
2006-08-14 10:36:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him withdrawing his love (not speaking to you for weeks when you don't do as he wishes) is a form of emotional abuse (not to mention passive-manipulative)... and you won't accept it from him anymore.... he should be proud he raised a child who is not afraid to make their own decisions, and assure him he has taught you well enough that you are able to make your own now.
"To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing
it's best, night and day, to make you everybody else;
means to fight the hardest battle any human being can
fight; and never stop fighting." - e.e. Cummings
.
2006-08-14 07:38:00 · answer #4 · answered by mama_bears_den 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't take money from him,and don't tell him everything. If you don't live with him he cant know what is going on all the time if you don't tell him. If you screw up because you did something dumb, don't expect him to bale you out. That's part of getting him out of your business,and part of growing up
2006-08-14 07:41:44 · answer #5 · answered by I CAN SEE RIGHT THROUGH YOU! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just say dad i know u care about me but im older now and i now all u want to do is help but i'm ok on my own and just want to be indepentant
2006-08-14 07:37:32 · answer #6 · answered by Sammy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks like the easiest way to get him to leave you alone is to do something to make him mad.
You can't avoid hurting his feelings, so just do it and let time heal the rest; in the meantime, you're free to live your life.
2006-08-14 07:34:58 · answer #7 · answered by drumrb0y 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋