God say it is sin to commit adultery in your mind!?

Question

I have commit adultery and repented my sin and is follow Gods way. But I am still somethimes in my mind thinking and fantazising and even dreaming of my adultist. Who do I get this sin out of my life. I have prayed and everything but the dreams is getting worse. It is like i am anyway commiting adultery in my mind.

Answer 1

AngIe, I looked at a few of your other questions and see the struggle you have been having over wanting to please God and yet both thinking and doing things that you don't want to do... and probably feeling a lot of guilt, and confusion, and maybe even questioning God and your own salvation because of your struggle.

It's okay for you to be in that spot right now. All Christians have been there and even are there now -- wanting to please God, yet struggling with doing so and sometimes finding ourselves just wanting to please ourselves.

Have you read some of Paul's writings in the New Testament? He had this problem too. He agonizes over "doing what I do not want to do," and "not doing what I want to do." He constantly knew what was right, he wanted to do what was right, yet he found himself not doing what was right. He even got frustrated enough to refer to his body as a "body of death" (!) because he felt so overwhelmed by the temptations.

I know it would seem like, having been "saved" or trying to follow God, we should get better and things should get easier or the temptations should become less. That's just not the case in reality. I am 37, so I've had more years to deal with this -- and I've heard the same thing from people who are in their 50's or later who have experienced the same thing.

Most sins come from a real need in us -- we feel empty or lonely or anxious in some way, and want to feel better. So we find whatever it is that makes us feel alive or good again, no matter what it happens to be. The sexual behavior you feel guilty about no doubt helped you feel better for a little bit, feel good about life, feel desirable to someone, and so on. That's why it's hard to shake.

Unfortunately, sex in those situations tends to be about us, what makes us feel good, what we want, and so on... and there is not real "love" being shown to the other person. There is no commitment such as marriage... it is just about temporarily agreeing to use each other to fill one's own need. This hurts people's relationships with God and each other, and this is why it's called "sin."

When you became saved, did you understand that God loved you -- not the "perfect Angle" that he might one day make you into, but the "real Angle" that struggles with temptations, feels hurt over some situations, doesn't feel so good about herself, and is afraid she'll never be perfect and pleasing? He sees you just as you are, in all the mess, and is committed to loving you anyway.

I would tell you, accept the truth that you are tempted to indulge in sexual behavior. That's just reality. That's not an excuse to do everything you feel, it just means accepting that you are fallible, human, weak in some ways, hurting, and prone to wanting to be "happy" more than pleasing God sometimes.

If you think about your temptations and obsess about them all the time, you will use all up all the energy you could spend on God and others. God has freed you from that "living death."

When you fail or have trouble with the temptation, admit it. Pray about it, apologize, ask for help, ask God to change you over time so you better resemble Jesus, ask him for patience to accept yourself right where you are. Then let it go and focus on God.

(You will know when you're in the "right place" because instead of feeling like you are "bad" and will be punished by God because you can't do things right, you'll feel a large feeling of sadness you can't do better, a desire to pray to God about things rather than fearing him, and a desire to please Him as best as you can where you are at because he has loved you just as you are.)

If you have accepted your own "fallen nature," you can focus on God's glory -- what He's done, what He wants to do in people's lives, the beauty that he has created here, the beauty that comes out when people love each other and sacrifice to each other.

We have no hope focusing all of our attention on our mistakes: Our hope only really comes by looking at God and focusing on Him.

I know this is probably a little vague. I wish I could say it better than I have. I know what it's like to beat myself up and question myself for years; and how that was really still just me focusing on "me," not accepting my sinful self as par for the course, and not accepting God's love and focusing on Him instead.

Hang in there. If you can find an adult who seems to have a peace about themselves, maybe you can go to them and ask questions and have someone who can support you so that you can keep growing.

Answer 2

From a man who loves God and is still in the flesh. Christ sets some standards that it would be ideal if we could live up to them. I believe however that you can find in Romans "oh what a wretched man I am, I do what i shouldn't all the time" Loosely translated of course. For me the key is to strive to walk like Jesus, and not be disappointed when I fail. When you accept yourself as an adulter and think that it's alright is when you get into trouble.

In the old testament the High Priest made sacrifices for you. At Calvary the veil, that separates us from God, was rent from the top to bottom, this allows us to enter into the HOLY OF HOLY's that the High Priest went into before Calvary. What this means is that you can instantly get forgiveness by simply acknowledging to yourself your sin and asking Christ to forgive you.

Answer 3

This message is that adultery is such a serious offense, don't even think it for you may follow though and commit it.

The Bible is clear adulterers will not inherit the Kingdom of God.

Be careful of thougths for it shows the true heart condition as being bad.

Mat 15:19 For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander.

Mat 5:28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart

Rom 6:12 Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal bodies, to make you obey their passions

Jam 1:14 But each person is tempted when he is lured and enticed by his own desire.
Jam 1:15 Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.

Answer 4

It seems to me you are going through a very trying time. When you find yourself going into that direction, redirect your thoughts to something else. Are you married? Only one that is married commits adultery. The person you are fantasizing about, could you possibly be in love with the person? Are you a Christian, if so read the New Testament and try to keep the Lord's words near to you.

Answer 5

You are still missing something in your life, if you continue to think about someone other than your husband.

This is not an issue any religion can solve, you need to look at yourself and figure out what need you have that isn't being met and saitsfy that need in way that doesn't require the actions of another person. You need to take care of you.... nobody else can make you feel complete. It is a fantasy.

Learn about who you are and how to meet your needs on your own and you will be happier than ever with yourself and your marriage.

Praying that someone else will fix everything for you is pointless.

Answer 6

Angle,
Do not keep praying about this. I know that sounds strange, but you are right that it makes you think about it more.

As soon as you get a thought of that person...make yourself stop. You can do it. As far as dreaming of that person, you can't make yourself stop that, but when you wake up you can.

You are feeling guilty, and you should be feeling guilty, because you are not viewing this person in a way that you should.

Something that helps me keep my thoughts straight is that I remind myself that God has made this person. I will be with this person in heaven and they are a brother in Christ. For some reason, if I focus on the brother part...that helps me.

I have had similar struggles. I had some of the worst advice from well meaning Christians. Most said "Don't worry...everyone fantasizes..."

Well, I can tell you that it almost ruined my marriage. I almost lost my family over it.

As soon as you get the thoughts, realize what is really going on. 1. Satan wants to ruin you...and this person may be the one that does you in.

2. Fantasy is the first step to reality.

3. You are believing a lie.

The lie you are believing is ,,,, He will make you happy and fill a void you need filled. You deserve better than you currently have.

You need to realize that God is the main source of fulfillment. When you most desire God, everything else falls into place.

The second thing you need to realize is that God has provided a way for you to be sexually satisfied. He knows we have desires and he has provides a path that is not sinful. That path is only to be walk on with your husband.

Sometimes the only way we can learn is by putting our feet in the water to see if it is good or not.

I'm telling your thought life is bad...you should be running for your life. Stay away from this man...never speak with him. That sounds drastic, but if you don't want to fall ...stay away from him. You should never be in contact with any men that you find attractive.

I've learned from my own experience that I can' t be around any men. It is just that plain and simple. I am never alone with a man. If I must speak with a man, I do it in a public place with my husband there or with a girlfriend.

Am I still attracted to some people? Yes, you bet...but I know the truth now. Satan will place that apple in front of me...I'll look at it and see how good it will be... But guess what. One bite will ruin everything. It isn't good at all.

Jeremiah 17:9 (NKJV)
"The heart is deceitful above all things,
And desperately wicked;
Who can know it?

1 Tim. 2:14 (NKJV)
And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived, fell into transgression.

Some women may like to flirt and play with fire, but it is wrong and it isn't fine. Don't be like Eve. Women have the tendancy to deceive themselves. Men know the sin for what it is. They know the truth about the sin. Women deceive themselves.

I've seen women fall for this lie, hook, line and sinker...the fall for the whole thing. Men don't ... they can play with this sin and it won't overtake them. Men can participate in this sin and still go home to their wife and family. Women can't.

God does not want this from any of us, men or women.

Please contact me if you need specific help. Run girlfriend.

Answer 7

No, the men who wrote the bible put it in, not God.

Remember, no matter what anyone says, God did NOT write the bible, men did!

So, use your head and common sense. Think things out and do what YOU think is right for you, not a 2,000 year old book that is full of fairy tales.

It's normal to think about sex.. it's not a bad thing. I don't know if you're talking about marriage adultery or if you are talking about premarital sex. If you are single.. please realize that sex is a very normal part of your life that you should not shy away from... don't let an old book make you feel guilty about sex.

But if you are married and keep thinking about other men.. then try not to think about the adultery but if it pops in your head from time to time, don't beat yourself up over it.. just try to think of something else. Take care!

Answer 8

Adultery in your mind is a sin, most of us commit it at one time or another, some every day!

That is why we need prayer and redemption.

As a Catholic, we have Confession, by the way, we don't confess to the priest, we confess THROUGH the priest to Jesus.

Common mis-conception.

Peace!

By the way, we don't worship statues or even Mary.

Peace Again!

Answer 9

The formula is simple the the execution takes time. Truly confess it before God.. ask for sincere forgiveness (which I think that you may have done) and fast and pray... The word says some of these (difficult situations) can only go through prayer and fasting... The fervent effectual prayer of the righteous availeth much....

Answer 10

Any normal human has thoughts of sex often, and it is outrageous for anyone to say that is wrong. Priests are totalitarian, i.e. control every action and thought. To say that such natural impulses are sinful creates guilt feelings in gullible people such as you. How do you relieve the guilt priests created in you? They can for a fee. They are like flim flam men who come to a town and poison the water supply. Then, they sell antidote. Robert S. DeRopps noted that organized religion is the world's oldest con game. It is an insidious one, as your inner turmoil over nothing demonstrates. "Lighten up", lady! Question your beliefs, for you cannot live with them without going nuts.

Answer 11

Continue to pray, renew your mind. Study the Bible. When the devil comes, resist and he will flee. When the thought comes, rebuke it.
Have you done a "spiritual house cleaning" at home? Get rid of things that don't belong, anoint the place with oil. Pray God to protect your mind from those thoughts.