Help! My 21 month old is attached to my hip. Trust me I really don't mind it but I don't know what to do about it and if it is normal. She wants absolutely nothing to do with men, like my uncles and her uncles. She will go to her daddy but prefers to be with me, when other family members try to hold her or get near her, she starts to cry like she is scared to death. Then when I leave the room when we are at a family members house she goes nuts (crying and screaming) I am a stay at home mom, which I can usnerstand thats why she likes being with me, but what is going on with the guy thing. She is never alone with any men, either my husband or I am always with her (so I don't think anyone has done anything bad to her) When we go to church she won't stay in the nursery, the people in charge of the nursery come and get us out of church service b/c she is so upset when she is in there. What do you think?
2006-08-14 01:13:15 · 9 answers · asked by awesomemommy05 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Why does she get upset when men come near her and why does she get upset when i leave the room? Is it normal and what do I do to make things better for her. My 6 yr. old son never went through this.
2006-08-14 01:14:13 · update #1
My cousin did the exact same thing.
My auntie had to call a head to shoe stores to see if there were men working that day because if there were, she couldn't take my cousin into that store. Grocery stores were a nightmare, they couldn't go passed a man without her screaming, and my auntie couldn't leave her home with her father because she screamed loud enough to bring cops. Same with the doctor's office. If she saw even one man in the hall, she screamed like blue blazes. Until the visit was over. The doctor said that my aunt had to be more firm with her. My aunt said that is stupid, how do you be firm when your child is so terrified they are hysterical?
Same as your girl, no men ever messed with her or were ever alone with her long enough to even scare her.
She was attached to my auntie like your girl is to you too.
She grew out of it.
Good news huh?
I want to say she was 3 when she quit screaming everytime a man got to close to her. She was 4 or 5 when she became more comfortable with men. She stopped being so clingy when she went to preschool, granted it was the preschool my auntie worked at and she had to stay with her a few days, but by the end of the school year she wasn't so clingy.
My auntie never pushed the issue, never made it seem strange that her kid screamed in terror at men, she ignored the fear as best she could and encouraged bravery.
My cousin is married now (to a man), gainfully employed and not in a nut house somewhere.
Be patient, she will grow out of it.
2006-08-14 02:18:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have two boys. One of them didn't know a stranger and wanted to talk to everyone. He would even grab people in the store to get their attention. The other one didn't want anything to do with anyone but me. I didn't put them in daycare either, so it was hard to expose him to more people. He didn't like men at all. I noticed it was their deep voice that scared him. He still to this day doesn't like loud things or sounds with a lot of base. I just kept looking for friends that I could get him used to. It will take some time,but look for social things that your child seems to be comfortable with and try to capitalize on those things for a start. My brothers child is afraid of the grass, go figure.
2006-08-14 08:24:43 · answer #2 · answered by shugabam! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Kids that age can become clingy, one of mine did......it could just be down to men's voices being louder,deeper or just perhaps their size, you'll never know....BUT don't go looking for ultra motives in a child that young unless it continues as they get older...all sorts of things scare wee ones and not every child is the same.
2006-08-14 08:39:12 · answer #3 · answered by lyndles 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i have two kids. one is a boy who does not meet a stranger. he talks to everyone. and a girls who is really shy. she only like/talks to part of the family. when we are out in public, if a man walks in the room, she starts screaming like he was trying to kill her. the girl is almost 4. she out grew the part with most of the family, the more she seen them, the better she liked them. but there is still a part of her that if she dont want to talk she just wont. i can understand where you are coming rom. but i do not know what to do. mine still does it.
2006-08-14 09:36:08 · answer #4 · answered by sister4818 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well let's hope just a stage but if it goes on for a few more months i'd say just leave her with a relative or hubsand for a few hours if she cries she'll get over it in no time and stop being so attached
2006-08-14 08:22:09 · answer #5 · answered by Moo moo I'm a chicken 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think this is normal. I have had three and all three were like that. They were scared to death of other people. They have grown up to be fine upstanding adults. Don't worry, she will outgrow it.
2006-08-14 08:28:25 · answer #6 · answered by jbpammy004 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it is normal ..my niece wouldn't come to me NOW SHE IS THREE SHE FINALLY LET ME HOLD HERE! MY BROTHER STAYED HOME WITH HER AND SHE ONLY GOES TO MALES NOT FEMALES ..she was petrified with my long hair!
THEY WILL BE CLINGING UNTIL THE AGE OF THREE OR FOUR..
YOU KNOW IT DEPENDS ON THE CHILD'S PERSONALITY MY BOYS THEY WERE EASY GOING NO PROBLEM THEY GO TO ANYBODY AND NO TEARS!! BUT AT CERTAIN AGE AROUND 3 YEARS OLD THEY WOULDN'T GO TO THE BABYSITTER AT THE PLAY GROUP....HEY CRIED AND CRIED BUT EVENTUALLY THEY REALIZE THEY HAVE NO CHOICE!
IT WILL PASS..THEY GO THROUGH STAGES..
MY BOYS ARE NOW 7 AND 14.
2006-08-14 10:34:01 · answer #7 · answered by +++++ SPOOK ++++ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she s so attached to you that she wants to see you al the time!
but i dont know whether its normal or what!
so maybe you can ask her ped.
2006-08-14 08:19:58 · answer #8 · answered by pinkcloud2015 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WELL SHE WILL GROW OUT OF IT.BUT BE SURE TOO HAVE OTHERS COME AROUND MORE....
2006-08-14 08:19:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋