I have a friend whose husband is a total non-believer in any God at all, personal or otherwise and needs proof. It upsets her because she is a believer, but she loves him. She cannot discuss this, nor feel close to him, because of his non-belief. She does not know what to do, and does not push it on him, but she is feels a real void in their marriage. . Is there any hope . .?
2006-08-14 00:21:58 · 38 answers · asked by shardf 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
The key to believing in God is "Belief" "Believe" and "faith" are the two primary elements to religion. Think about when God parted the Red Sea or rained down Mana for the Israelites and so many other stories like that in the Old Testament. Yet the Israelites still made a golden calf and worshiped it after seeing first hand all God's power and miracles. Did they really believe in God? Yes, but I think they took Him for granted. We may say that if God did miracles like that for us today we would all believe, but I wonder. Your question is impossible for us to answer, because a person has to first believe there is a God and believe the Bible is actually from God, because the Bible is the only real proof we have. If you don't believe in it, it's hard to have hope. Your friend can only pray for God to send the Holy Spirit into her husbands heart, and pray without ceasing. Let God work on his heart while the rest of you just be a good example of what God can do to a person's life.
2006-08-14 00:34:47 · answer #1 · answered by Just Some Guy 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Well I assume that we are talking about Christains. Christians are redeemed by faith so showing proof of God would remove the need for faith. I am not a Christian but I do believe in God. I have no proof in God I just have faith that someone higher then myself is running things. Nothing could ever give me proof of this. It is just something I have come to accept in my own life. I think it is sad that she is married to someone she is not close to. I am wondering if she was a believer before she was married. If she was then maybe the best advise should have been, "You shouldn't have married him." You two are believers though so for you there should always be hope.
2006-08-14 00:32:40 · answer #2 · answered by Chuck C 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, how did they not have the foresight to see that this would be a problem even before they got married?
Second, why do you want to convince anyone of anything that needs to be decided from within?
If someone requires incontrovertable proof of God, of which there is zero evidence, to believe that God exists, then he will never believe in God. Religion cannot exist without faith. And faith is destroyed by proof (whether it's for or against).
2006-08-14 00:27:52 · answer #3 · answered by 006 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Why did she marry him in the first place? Was it because she loved him for who he was? She only needs to live her life...not his....She should continue to practice what she believes and leave the rest to God. My grandfather didn't believe in God untill the end of his life and to my mind that was the way God intended things to be. It's amazing how the way a person lives their life has more effect on others than preaching about how they believe one should live their life. She could try leading by example.......OR....Maybe he is the one who is following the right path..... Good luck!
2006-08-14 00:32:10 · answer #4 · answered by vmmc_64 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is not going to convert her husband any more than her husband is going to convert her. If she focuses on this difference of belief, it will be a hole in the marriage. Try, instead, to concentrate on other things they have in common and let the guy have his beliefs. If she truly loves him, she will respect his right to think for himself.
The most ardent atheist and the most fanatic fundamentalist still have mostly the same views in life. That's because everybody is human and lives in similar cultures. You'll find that both have similar values. Both will think that murder is bad, charity is good, etc. You don't have to have the same beliefs to get along together.
I'm an atheist, myself, and my girlfriend is Muslim. My parents are Christian and much of the rest of my family is Jewish. I get along with ALL of them. There is much that we all have in common in our views.
When discussing those views, your friend will have to figure out how to communicate to her husband. If your friend uses the Bible to back up any arguments she makes to support what she says, that will probably not be convincing to her husband. Instead, she should try to come up with more real-life reasons why she holds her views. For example, instead of saying that a woman shouldn't have sex before marriage because God says so, try thinking of other reasons why this wouldn't be wise, such as a lack of resources, committment or maturity in a complex society.
If your friend does this, then she might find that her husband has more in common with her than she thinks. She might also learn more and appreciate more her husband's views.
2006-08-14 00:45:14 · answer #5 · answered by nondescript 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is not possible to convince him but he may have psychological weaknesses which allow him to be pressured into denying his real beliefs and espousing hers. Certainly not the basis upon which I would desire a relationship but to each their own.
As an aside, it is very likely and perhaps worth considering, that he too feels a real void in their marriage. If I were married and my wife was religious, I would feel estranged from her in many important ways. Just a thought - she's probably not the only one feeling alone.
2006-08-14 00:31:45 · answer #6 · answered by awakening1us 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Being "in love" means accepting a person for who they are, the good with the bad. There is a stereotype that says men love women for who they are, women love men for who they could be.
She will need to decide which is more important, her love for him, or her desire for him to believe as she does. Given time, things change, including beliefs.
Tell her to ask herself, if he were to suddenly "believe" would she be happy or wonder whether he is just saying that to make her happy?
You cannot "make" someone believe anything. You CAN love someone for who they are. Try to force the belief on him and she WILL lose him. If she cannot accept his unbelief, I'd say the situation is already lost, the only thing missing is the actual breakup.
2006-08-14 00:43:26 · answer #7 · answered by IndyT- For Da Ben Dan 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
There is hope, but not in logical proofs. If he's from Missouri, she might have to show him what a believer is like to live with. The rest is up to God...
2006-08-14 00:25:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Well the first thing is to pray for him. Only God himself can show people he is real by revealing himself to them. The next thing is to lead a life in obedience to God' s ways, as the believer's life will then become testimony to God's existence. Then all you can do is tell the non-believer (in a loving gracious way) that God is real, that Jesus died for them, and that there is no other way to heaven except through gving your life to Jesus and living obediently to Him.
That is all you can do - the rest is up to God.
I'm praying for you to... The Lord is with you.
2006-08-14 00:32:48 · answer #9 · answered by jquittenton2 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
She needs to trust the Lord and Love her husband. Actions speak louder than words. I am sure that the Lord does not want to ruin her relationship with her husband. If she loves the Lord than there should be MORE love in her heart for others and she should be willing to grow in patience.
He needs what I call "Live Tiger Evangelism".
A man was loosing the love of his wife and went on a pilgrimage to a wise man at the top of a mountain. The wise man told him that he could give him a cure for his relationship with his wife. "But first" He said "Bring me the whisker of a live tiger".
The man went off on his quest. He knew of a mountain near his home that had a tiger that lived in a cave near the top. He thought it over and decided on a plan. One day he left a steak at the bottom of the mountain near the tiger's path.
He went back the next day to find the steak gone and replaced it with one a little further up the mountain. He left a steak out each day closer and closer to the cave of the tiger. Finally he left the steak near the mouth of the cave. He knew that the tiger had been watching him for the last few weeks and was getting used to his presence. He put a steak at the mouth of the cave every day for a week watching the tiger closely. Finally he was able to put the steak right in front of the tiger. He did that for a few more days then when the tiger was quite tame he reached up and clipped a whisker.
He traveled back to the wise man and triumphantly presented the whisker. The wise man told him "With the same patience and kindness that you gained the whisker of the live tiger you will win back the love of your wife.
2006-08-14 00:25:42 · answer #10 · answered by Makemeaspark 7 · 2⤊ 3⤋