now my parents are really mad with me because I asked out kiki and not this other gal that they had chose?

Question

OK well some of you might remember that I just asked out my best friend and she said yes. The thing is that I just told my parents last night and they are really mad with me because they wanted me to date this other girl that I was so not interested in

Does anyone have some advice on how to tell them that I want to be with kiki I mean I tried and it just ended up in a really big fight and since you guys and gals helped me out before I was kinda hoping that you might have some good advice

Thanks alot people really
Jay

Answer 1

Depending on how old you are and what prospects you have for employment, I'd recommend running away together, if not now then later. You could explain the situation to Kiki and have a false relationship with this other girl to shut your parents up, you could even tell this girl that you don't like her one bit and it's all your parent's idea - what's she going to do? Plan ahead and be in cahoots with Kiki, I'm sure if she likes you enough she'll stick by you until the time is right to elope :-)

Answer 2

Tell them that you need to make your own decisions, and your own mistakes. If they want you to be a stable, well adjusted adult, they have to let you make your own choices and mistakes. This will build your character.

They cannot protect you all their lives, as one day they won't be around any more and you will have to make your own decisions and live with your own mistakes.

Tell them that you really like Kiki, and try and find out from them why they don't want you to go with her. Maybe they have a valid reason, and are giving you good advice to protect you, but if it is just there personal choice, and not for any particular reason, then I don't see how they can make you go out with someone you don't like.

You are over 21 so it really should be your choice, not theirs.

PS: I think that Kiki is a very pretty girl and I can see why you lare so fond of her.

Answer 3

I hope you and Kiki will be very happy together, after all you have been friends for ages, which is a great start. Hopefully seeing you in a strong & loving relationship, and seeing how happy Kiki makes you will be enough to convince your parents that you made the right choice sooner or later. It's your life and no one has the right to chose who you spend it with, but you. Be happy.

Answer 4

I feel for you. My parents despise my fiance. It has made a terrible and constant rift form between me and my parents. We don't talk about it much since I left home but it's constantly there beneath the surface of everyday life like a subaceous boil. I have been with my fiance since I was 17, I am now 24. So you can see the problem won't go away.

However, I have decided to sepnd the rest of my life with my current partner and we are getting married in May next year with or without my parent's consent.

You may be interested to hear the tactics that I have tried (none of which worked for me): I introduced him to my parents and tried to start up conversations but they wouldn't speak to him, i tried to keep my parents informed of the decisions i was making regarding our relationship no matter how awkward I felt but this just seemed to make them even more angry.

There is no easy way to make them happy with your choice. You have to believe in yourself and your choices. If you feel that it's right for you then all you can do is carry on. Remember, you are the one who is going to have to live with your decision, not them. Don't ruin your life by trying to live it for someone else. You get one chance, do what you need to do. Make the most of it.

I am sorry to be bleak but I don't want to give you a false hope. I think that other people who have answered your question are trying to reassure you which is really nice of them.

But from experience, I know that if families don't like each other, they never will. People DO NOT change. You are in a no-win situation. Your relationship with your parents will be a miserable drudge for the rest of your life. That's the price. Just make sure that this girl is worth it. I know my fiance is.

Answer 5

Tell your parents, you feel ling are with Kiki and not the other girl and it would not be fair to date her. That you want to experiece love and not just use this girl for what you can get from her.

Answer 6

Your parents had high hopes for you to date this other girl, so thats what they set their sights on and you choosing someone else goes against them and so they think they don`t respect their feelings and wishes.

Not much you can do except give them time to calm down and they will get used to the idea and warm to the both of you.

Good luck!

Answer 7

You need to be firm but fair as you do not want to fall out with them. Tell them that you were not interested in the other girl and that it is Kiki who you want to be with. Never let your parents tell you who to go out with it is up to you not them.

Good luck

Answer 8

Say you will have them charged with attempted rape.

As in trying to forcing you to have sex with someone you don't want to... thats basically rape.

If married thats multiple rape... Really simple.

You can point out they are behaving like pimps and human trafficer sex slavers as thats just how they are behaving...


And that parents should only try and arrange relationships for kids if they are really lonly and can't find someone of their own.


Is kiki a gang member? junkie? serious criminal? beating you up etc?

Doubt it then they have no say.

Answer 9

tell your parents if they dont let you date kiki, you will turn into gay and bring a boy-friend home, that will shut them up for good.

Answer 10

parents ALWAYS get involved with our lives they lived theirs you need to live yours, if they can understand that then tough! you need to stand up for yourself and tell them straight that kiki is who you REALLY want. GO FOR IT, GOOD LUCK