she is back with her b/f from before me. they both go to my church, and me and her have almost the exact same friends. i LOVE seeing her still because i still love her and stuff, but it makes me want to cry and i feel sooooo crummy whenever i see her with her b/f from before me. im 16. i have to see this almost everytime i do something with my friends or go to youth group. i love her and it hurts me sooooo much to see her being this close with him after all we had together. it wasnt a break up b/c i did anything wrong, it was really complicated but the main reason was because our whole churchwanted them together again and her mom did too even though she said it was her choice in the end. She had a TON of pressure from a TON of ppl. Its just sooo depressing to see them together cuddling during movies or kissing or something since we used to share that and she looked and even admitted to being more happy. what should i do? i cant quit going to this church, but i feel aweful going there
2006-08-06 19:33:35 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well.. If they are together, due to pressure of people wanting them together, more then likely it won't work out. they both have to want to be in the relationship.
It hurts, but be the best friend that you can be to her. Don't try to take her from him, but be there for her when she needs you.
Because if you continue to be her friend through it all, and they don't end up staying together, she might consider you in the future.
She admitted to being more happier with HIM OR YOU?
Either way, everything is happening for a reason. Whether you and her stay friends, and you get another girl, who wants to be with you, everything WILL be work out fine, maybe not how you want or intended, but you're still young!! (no offense!!)
I'm sorry this is happening to you.
2006-08-06 19:43:44 · answer #1 · answered by GoldenAngel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sheesh........... that's why I quit going to church.....trying to pressure people to do what the church wants you to do...I would give it time and hang out with some other friends besides there.....if you only hang out with church ppl find some other people who go to churchs like at another youth group or maybe you have other friends from school until it heals a little... I am really sorry you are going through that.........*hugs*
I guess you could try not looking at them for awhile I know it's pretty difficult but since it;s so hard for you.....maybe tell her that you need time and still continue talking to friends don't put them in the middle.......
2006-08-06 19:44:35 · answer #2 · answered by prinsisss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A broken heart is painful no matter what age you are. You need to give yourself some time to heal. Believe me, you will heal. I truly believe, once you really truly love someone you will always love them...But, this doesn't mean that you should continue to be around the person if it causes you pain to see them. Give yourself some time away from her. You don't want someone that doesn't want you. Think about that, and with a little time you will be able to rejoin your church and start looking at other girls that show interest in you.
2006-08-06 19:46:16 · answer #3 · answered by MegMaher 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when you love someone so much and have to let them go, it will take some time to heal from the emotional pain. and if she's decided to go back with him, pressure or not, you need to accept it and move on. move through the emotions of sadness, anger, then acceptance with dealing with loss of a relationship. it's important for you to move through these emotions than bury them; otherwise these emotions will creep up on you at some point later in your life. some times it is about making the big change, which for you may be to leave your membership of that church. i'm sure it's not easy if many of your friends are there, or even how it may appear if you did leave, but you need to gain some freedom from this community, and the presence of your gf in this relationship, and regain sanity in your mind and heart. a friend of mine moved from her church, and she was the pastors daughter, to another one because of the pressures she faced in the culture and within the church community. similar to your situation, the guy she liked and ended up not going out with, left the church because he couldn't deal with some of the issues you are dealing with. like you some times i will see the gf of the guy i was going out with, and i would feel anger and disdain towards her. i realize then that the separation was hard for me than i wanted to admit....everytime i saw her the emotions would come up for me. i deal with this by saying to myself that the cards were dealt this way for a reason, i've really tried my best, so i willingly accept this and move on....there is more than one person that you can love in a lifetime.
2006-08-06 20:20:49 · answer #4 · answered by gurrrly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey don't fight for someone who doesn't want you back. it's just a waste of your time and energy. you are so young, you have many many more fish in the sea. i know it hurts, but try your hardest to move on. you know that saying, if you love them let them go......you will find happiness somewhere else. be strong, good luck--o/c
2006-08-06 19:43:29 · answer #5 · answered by origchick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why did you let her go in the first place?you have done your earnest efforts not to let her go if you still love her..but i know in the end its always her who wil decide who's it gonna be..
just let time heal your wounds..
2006-08-06 19:39:48 · answer #6 · answered by Maggie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well try another church..
2006-08-06 19:40:04 · answer #7 · answered by krissy m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋