television and children?

Question

my son is in year 3 ... 8 years old...
i am wanting to ban him from watching television in the afternoons after school as i cant seem to get him motivated to do anything else... ie homework... play...
do you think it is fair to make television a weekend and school holiday treat only?
i am thinking it might help him to stay focused and not develop bad habits

i just find i have to nag him every day to turn the television off .... he does play and we do lots of things together as a family but i just feel like during the week it is a nuisance

is it mean of me to keep it to a weekend holidays thing only though?
i just feel he rushes through everthing just so he can watch tv

we still do so much together evry day... me go to the park, bike riding, make cookies and cupcakes, art, he does tai kwon do ... we love doing things with the children... BUT he wants to rush so he can watch tv lol...
i have a 4 year old as well but really want to teach them good habits... i just dont want tv to be a priority...
my 8 year old is very smart at school and i just want him to stay focused as well

i am from perth western australia
gday mate... LOL

i feel great that no one has made me feel like a mean mother....
it will be so hard to pick a best answer here they are just all so helpful

Answer 1

I do that already. They don't suffer for it. Go for it. you won't regret it

Answer 2

Your the mother, turn it off! Boundaries,actions and consequences woman...establish them. Why does he have the final say? No t.v. until he's finished his homework and gotten a little excersize, nothing wrong with that. I don't think tv should be an all day thing, it's an easy way to just "check out" I agree, but honestly kids don't need that much tv. Take him to the library and get him a book to read, there are so many action adventure books that could stimulate his mind more than anything he sees on tv. You are the parent here, you have the final say, use the tv as a reward, an hour of tv for every chapter he's read in a book or something like that. It may see mean but he'll thank you later for teaching him how to think and use his brain.

Answer 3

You are the parent, you make the decisions. Children need structure. Set up other activites for the kids to do. When he gets home, serve him a healthy snack (apple and peanut butter) and ask him about school. Find out what homework he has to do and make it a rule that he does it before tv. If there isn't any homework, have an activity book that keeps his mind activated or have him help you start dinner. There are other things to do instead of watch tv. Parents just have to make the decision for the children. He may be po'd for a week but he will eventually get into spending time with you. You will enjoy it more. This will also help you down the line when he gets older because you have established a conversation routine. There are tons of parenting books out there. Try Dr. Phil or Dr. Dobson for some real good advice. Good luck!

Answer 4

Our kids have a "Responsibility List" which is a check list of things they have to do in the morning, afternoon, and prior to bedtime. For each time frame, once the respnsibility list is complete there is free time. I've had kids take two hours to clean their rooms. It's their choice if they want to waste their time on that. Usually, they highly regret it later on when they realize they couldn't ride their bikes or do art projects or whatever they like to do.

Options for free time are clear. Television is only an option for certain periods of time during the day, morning isn't one of them, neither is the two hours following release from school. They only get about an hour a day because it rots their brains. We've told them this and they agree. However, they do get to watch some TV because, sometimes we all do stuff that rots our brains and it's nice to sit back and just not think for a while.

Basically, we are trying to reinforce the idea that responsibility comes before priviledge. TV is a priviledge and one of the first things we take away when a child isn't taking care of responsibilities. I'd throw the thing off a cliff in a heartbeat (but there's a littering law against it) without flinching.

Answer 5

I think it's totally acceptable. Teach him that priorities come before television. Once he gets settled into a routine, you could reintroduce the television, but limit the time that he is allowed to watch it on school nights (maybe 30-60 minutes) If he has one program, in particular, that he favors...maybe that will be the only one that is watched on school days.

Good luck

Just curious, are you from Britain or Australia? My husband is from Scotland and you seem to have a similar manner of speech. (and it's rare that an American actually type out the word 'television'...we're lazy lol) And in America we usually say our children are in "third grade" instead of "year three". Anyway, I was just curious. I love listening to all of the different accents and different slang and such from both countries.

Answer 6

Fairness has nothing to do with this. You are his parent. It's your job to do what you believe is in his best interest.

Besides, rules don't necessarily have to be permanent, and it doesn't have to be all or nothing. You could limit him to 1 or 2 programs each day. You could try it for a few weeks and see what happens.

You could try working with him to create a daily schedule that he will live by every day. He has to set aside a particular time for homework, play, chores, and whatever else you see as necessary. He gets to choose, within reason, when everything is done, provided that he lets you know in advance what his choices are. You could let him choose whatever activity he wants beyond that, including TV. Since he made the schedule, it's "fair" to enforce it, right?

Answer 7

Is he 3 or 8 ?

Answer 8

Your question is warranted. Children should do their homework and household chores before they are allowed to view the television, or go out to play. The sooner that parents begin to set rules for the child the easier it is to enforce them.
There are a number of very well written television shows for children. They teach the child how to handle every day problems and situations that they should know about.
If you are starting with new limitations, be very clear that he can watch the t.v. after he completes his obligations. It is his reward for accomplishing the things that are important. You will be teaching a very important lesson to him. Good parenting, and good luck!!!

Answer 9

Make a rule that there's no t.v. til homework/chores are done and stick to it. If he has an abnormal amount of homework or chores to do, tape 2 shows so he knows that you will reward him when he finishes so he doesn't feel like he's missing out when he's doing the right thing. It also means that homework will be done properly because he's not rushing!

Or you could use t.v as a reward when he tries something new.

Answer 10

I have a rule that homework must be done after a snack while they are still in the "school mode". Once they start watching TV or playing, they wont get back into the work mode. I think it's important to play but after homework only.

Answer 11

I was having trouble with homework a couple years ago. I banned TV on weekdays. that didn't faze him...it actually seemed to make him take his time even longer...TV was something he WANTED to do...and since I took it away from him, he had no reason to hurry up and get it done. Last year I had a better teacher. I was able to talk to her a lot. She told me that the things she was giving for homework should not take no more then 20 mins...each subject 20 mins..so..I made up a new punishment that year and I plan to stick by it this year...when he comes home he gets a snack, and goes straight to homework. he gets that 20 mins to do each subject...if he does not complete it in the 20 mins..I make him put it up...and go to the next subject....IF he can do all his homework and is able to get each of them DONE in those 20 mins he can watch tv...needless to say I think only ONE time he went to school with unfinished homework....I mean you have to let them face the consequences for their own actions...he will get in trouble at school...
yeah, I would say it is unfair to a child to ban them from tv...if you watch tv and allow him to at different times (such as when u want him to) does seem unfair...I personally think that is showing a sign of getting a little more mature and showing his own independence...when they can show that they want something and work to get it. They should be allowed to....and from my own personally experience my mother made me spends time with her. Which also can cause resentment...if you want to spend time with your child and he wants it also, that’s great? But I would not push it on him.
talk to his teacher and ask her for advice as well....