my son is starting school this year , im having a really hard time with it, is this normal/?

Answer 1

Yes. Separation and loss of control. It gets easier.

Answer 2

I think it's completely normal. Anytime your child starts something big and new you're going to have anxiety about it. But I also have to say I think you should check your feelings just a little bit and make sure fear isn't a big factor. Missing your son, wondering how this will change your relationship I think is normal, but if you're actually fearing the place he's going to go, than you should do something about that.

If you find you are actually scared b/c you don't know much about where you're sending him, visit the school, call them and ask about the curriculum for his grade. You'll meet with some stubborness, since many a public school nowadays seems to think parents should just keep their noses out, but press on, you have every right to know all about the environment your son will be in and the curriculum he will be learning. If, after that, you find there's no good reason to be afraid of the place anymore, just rest and know you'll get used to not having him home all day every day.

If, on the other hand, you uncover things you dont' like (like when we learned my little sister would be taught about homosexual relationships in a kindergarten class at the school's library) then find an alternative. Look at private schools, or consider homeschooling, a great alternative, where your son can move at his own pace, and get more life experience than any brick and mortar school will ever allow.

Good luck!

Answer 3

My daughter is starting too. It's absolutely normal to have some anxiety. Both for your son and for you. Especially if you've been home with him in the years previous. Relax, you'll be fine, and he'll be fine. It's part of growing up. Can you tell that I am absolutely looking forward to it? I'm sure I may cry a little, and I wont' want to leave her, but it's time! And I am very happy for her. Good Luck!

Answer 4

Some children go off to school quite happily, especially if they have elder siblings and they've seen them do that.
But a first child of his parents, or a child who is excessively fussy / pampered / over-dependent upon his mother / a child who has many fears of various things and is timid or shy...... such a child may have difficulty in coping with the idea of going to school, and may develop more problems when he actually starts attending school.

These problems can be tackled by 'play-acting', which is therapeutic enough in most cases, where he goes to a 'pretend school' before he actually starts going to a real one.
Also, if there are any problems in the family, these have to be addressed too.

Answer 5

Separation anxiety is not just a term for the kids... parents get it too. I have worked in preschool for 14 years, and I have seen nearly as many parents as anxious as their children. I know it is hard to leave your child in the care of someone else... I also have two children of my own that I have had to leave with others. As a parent, it is difficult to accept that your child is growing independent of you, and eventually will not need you all the time. However, this is an important step in his life, and you need to be able to do what is best for his future outcome. As a preschool teacher, I have seen parents who have effectively separated and allowed their child the opportunity to prove the secure attachment bonds that they have built... I have also seen the parents who have hindered their child's growth by not being able to rein-in their own separation anxiety. Even though it will be difficult to leave your child, know that they are in a secure place, with people who care about children, and that they will be FINE. Teachers are generally very caring people who have children's best interests at heart, and will be responsive to your child's needs. At my center, if a child has a difficult time with transitioning to the classroom from home, we get them involved in an activity, while acknowledging their separation feelings. A good teacher should not try to discount a child's (or parent's) separation feelings, but work with them to help the family as a whole progress in their separations. The easier separations are made, the better the process will go. We tell our parents to give hugs and kisses, say "I love you" and "I'll be back later", and GO. If you delay, hanging around, feeling anxious, your child will pick up on that and think that there is something he needs to be anxious about as well. This is where you get the hysterical crying scenes. Yes, as you leave with a nice goodbye, your child may cry. Be assured that most children stop crying before you are even to the car, but if you want to check in on your child, just call! We have had some parents who had difficulty separating, and that extended the separation anxiety for the child as well, sometimes up to two months of crying every day. There have even been some parents who couldn't take it (for their own reasons) and pulled their child out of care, even though the child was adapting fine. Let me say that research shows that these children will be more anxious and less capable of adapting to new situations than children whose parents show them that it is ok to be away from them for periods of time. Besides, the best part of separation times is the look on your child's face as you come back in the door!!

Answer 6

I completely understand. My wife works 5 days a week and I work sometimes just 2 days. I have spent alot of time with my daughter who will be starting kindergarten this week and neither one of us are looking forward to it. She has been out running around with me on errands and everything else for the last few years keeping me company. I'm gonna be lost the first time I go to go run an errand and realize I'm alone. It's also a very exciting time too, to see them finally dressed in their best clothes and wearing their favorite shoes. I almost remember my first day...

Answer 7

Hard time by letting him go???? is this what u mean?

If so, i think its a problem because you are gonna suffer a lot watching him grow older.

You have to realize that a son is not a pet, is a human being, one time he will leave home and you need to be prepare.

Answer 8

Yes.

Watch a movie called Loverboy. with Kyra Sedwick. Although I don't think it is out on DVD. It shows the story of a single mother that have a hard time in letting her kid have a social life( like having kid friends or going to school)

Answer 9

Yes, it's quite normal. I don't get married but when my younger brother started school, I had many things to worry about. The school fee, books, notebooks, his classmates .... Sometimes he told me his difficulties in the school, about his friends and of course, about homework. You will get over this time, don't worry about it. If you have any difficulty, you can contact to your son's teacher to know more about your son's studying, homework ... I think your son will be happy when he goes to school, meet new friends. You can be his close friend and talk to him everyday. Listen to your son and you won't have any difficulty.

Answer 10

it is normal because he will be hanging with all kinds of kids. Picking up all kinds of stuff and new habits. Wait till you hear the language they are speaking these days. That is why a lot of parents are home schooling. Schools are becoming a nightmare.

Answer 11

yes it is perfectly normal its hard to let those babies grow up i bawled like a baby at my sons kindergarted graduation. now hes almost 9 and i'm in shock trying to figure out how he got so big so fast and my 2 year old is the same way i can't belive how big she is