is it o.k to love someone 20 years older than you?

Answer 1

It is perfectly fine. No problemo whatsoever.

The only thing you have to think about is life - and living together - how long you have together that is (average)

Ya know.. I was going to say.. you need to really think about it.. but then I look back.. I knew this one lady.. I was 22 or something.. she was later 40s. I really really liked her. We never actually became anything.. she came down with cancer. I went with her to an alternative clinic in mexico.. coz she asked me to go with for support. I think deep down.. there was a love between her and I. It wasn't a lust kind of love.. or whatever you want to call it.. and it wasn't a mom/son kind of love. It was just love.

Where the flip was I going with this.? Oh yes.. but now.. I look at my wife and I. She's 8 years younger than I. Women usually live longer than men. So .. if we talk statistics... I'm sorta nervous that she'll be left alone for some 20 or more years.

But ya know what? If I wasn't with her now.... tiz very possible that I would have never experienced this type of love... ever.

So I say., if you love the person.. don't hold back. If you are worried about the lifetime part.. maybe just don't get married.. be super super friends. If you aren't concerned about marrying more than once.. then why not get married. I personally only want to marry and have one love in that sense.

Personally? I think you can have a friend that you love more than your spouse. A spouse is somebody you choose to actually LIVE with and be with all the time. In my book, that takes a special person beyond just love. If that makes any sense?

I don't think that would ever happen to me because I think my spouse is my match in love and in life. So I'm happy as heck.

P.S. The only other thing you have to think about .. is your age now. If you're 15-22ish.. then you have much change to go through in life and your desires and what you want out of life will (probably) change. Meaning that so will your choice in partners. You also have lots of hormones and other things fogging up your vision of love. If you're in your early 30s.. then you probably know what's best.

Be sure you know what you're getting into before you get into it :)

P.S. lots of people think somebody older or younger than you is bad.. Myself? I think it's a perfect match sometimes. The older one has experience that you wouldn't have with somebody your own age.. lots of plus there.! LOTS! And then the older one benefits by having somebody around that is younger and keeps them more active and happy. I think it's a great thing. But it also does come with it's challenges :)

Answer 2

How old are you? I have loved someone 16 years older than me..but I was 29 at the time. If it feels right then go for it. If he is using you (as mine was me) then watch out. A lot of heartache for no trouble.

Answer 3

Well, techinically, love does not discriminate age, but in your situation I think it's best to get advice from your parents, good friends, or someone you feel comfortable talking with. Since I don't know what that 20 yrs. old person is like, I can't give you any advice. Try talking to someone who knows him and again, one that you feel comfortable talking to.

Answer 4

If a lady is 20 and the guy is 40, yes.

Answer 5

I love my mom and she is 15 years older than me, maybe I should think in terms more like my grandma who is 32 years older than me. Does that answer you question?

Answer 6

Loving is not a sin. But getting involved when you aren't in a legal age might complcate things.

Answer 7

Age is just a # and has nothing to do with it if your of age. All that matters is that you can be compatible and get along well. Other than that I think it's awesome! go for it!!

Answer 8

If you are over 18, there is nothing wrong with it. Follow your heart.

Answer 9

if yoiu are of legal age and both care about each other in my opion no there isnt . ?

Answer 10

No ! It's to much trouble and alot involved !