how do i punish my 9 year old son for answering back and not listening to me. i am at the end of my rope.?

Answer 1

its never ending my son has backtalked and still does .hes been punished for it over and over by writing sentences seemed to worked overall.and they hate not to be able to watch tv. repect is hard for children because they see us disrepectful to different situations we have .i asked my doctor about it and he said as long as the teacher was ok and his grades he was just being normal.

Answer 2

Join the club! It must be the age because Im going throught the same thing. The not listning thing is the beginning stages of selective hearing; this is not curable. All grown men suffer from it. Get used to it. I have started making him repeat what I say. Like when I give him a sequence of things to do...i have him repeat it all to me.

As far as the talking back..when I tell him something which does not require an answer and he tries to say something I say "Im sorry was that a question?"....or "That was not a question, I dont need an answer!". that ususally shutts him up!

You could always resort to a pop on the mouth if you are close enough when he talks back. Nothing hard or anything just to scare him the 1st or 2nd time then he wont do it again!

Good luck!

Answer 3

Wow. Lotta stress in that question. Try the decaf.

I don't know how old you are, but you've obviously got the edge on a 9 year old. You're the parent. You make the rules. You enforce the rules. Some people believe "spare the rod, spoil the child." Not me...

I believe your 9 year old will respect you more if you out think him. It isn't hard to do. You have much more life experience than him. Let him know that when he misbehaves, his bed time will be reduced by 1/2 hour. Be sure to stick to your guns and enforce it. After a few nights of 8 o'clock lights out, he'll see you aren't playing.
You must let him know that he is not allowed to disrespect you in ANY fashion. And just as bad behavior is punished, good behavior will be rewarded. When he is doing good, it is important that you hug him, let him know how proud you are of him, and recognize his good behavior.
Children act out to get attention. If they already are getting attention, they're less likely to act out. Spend time with your son whenever you can.
I'm often reminded of the movie "Uncle Buck" starring the late John Candy. He didn't get along with his niece at all. But he used his creativity to out think her at every turn.

Good Luck, Be Patient, and keep telling your 9 year old you love him. Especially in front of his friends. :)

Answer 4

One thing I have learned is that this behavior at this age is normal. Not acceptable, but normal. At age nine they are begining to assert their independence and opinion. Although this is normal its your job as a parent to guide this new independence in a way that is acceptable. Don't see this as a battle but rather as a chance to teach life lessons. In the real world this would not fly on a job or with relationships. So approach this with the attitude that you are preparing him for adulthood and it will take some of the frusation away of dealing with him. Once you have changed your attitude and thinking of this problem then approach him with a plan in hand. Whatever plan you decide to use, use it well and use it firmly. No negotiating no discussing. Use a calm and confidence tone showing no sign of stress. Children feed off of parents stress. Do not become lazy or lose focus with time. Stay consistent. That is very important! Once you realize you are doing this for his well being and happiness by bring him back in line with acceptable behavior, you will find it easier and easier to do. After all your doing it out of love for him.

Answer 5

This is going to be pretty difficult to do if you're just starting to make him respect you.You must put your foot down and let him know that you're the adult and what you say goes.A lot of parents at the end of their ropes would smack the hell out of him, in fact that's what I would do if he doesn't stop after a coupler of warnings. My mom used to warn me. It may not be the best thing ,but its an age old thing.He is going to test you to see how far he can go.fearShould have been struck into him a long time ago.

Answer 6

he sounds super intelligent and with that comes sarcasm and making observations you and others might not like~~with all of his gifts im pretty sure hes going to become something very special in life and so i will give you some good advice!~~~talk to him~~even when it seems hes not listening~~also instaed of lecturing him tell him stories of your life experience and always try to deepen the bond between the 2 of you

Answer 7

BE CONSISTENT !

DON'T LOSE YOUR TEMPER. He's the kid. You are the adult.

Then, select his punishment and stick to it. Take away privileges, etc.

And consult your family physician to be sure it's not some physical reason he is acting out.

Answer 8

Does he like the computer? Sports? You simply take away things that he loves until he conforms. I have three boys and a husband......it works on all of them. :)

Good luck.

Answer 9

you have to take away something they like, like tv or video games or dessert after dinner. You have to stand your ground and not give into his demands no matter how much he complains or cries. you have to show him that you're the boss and youre not gonna put up with it.

Answer 10

take the TV, computer, and video games away for a set time and stick to it. if he acts up double the time. time out!!!