OK I'm pregnant and I really love the father but he keeps leaving me and coming back. When he comes back he says all these great things and apologizing. Then tells me things like we're going too fast he's not ready for marriage, but he's the one who keeps bringing it up and rushing things. I do love him and I want to be with him. I always ed up forgetting my anger and letting him back in. I wish I knew how he really felt. I'm just lost and can't get over him or get him out of my head. I'm having his kid, (he says he believes me but has heard so much he wants a dna test) and I can't just not talk to him.
2006-08-06 14:33:57 · 16 answers · asked by lil sis 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You just love him too much.
2006-08-06 14:38:00 · answer #1 · answered by 120 IQ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that he is scared......if he is the one bringing up marriage and then saying you are moving to fast, he is scared. Having a baby is a Hugh deal and I think that he knows that the right thing to do is to marry you,but he isn't ready for that step, so then he leaves for a while, because he is scared. While he is gone he realizes that he doesn't want to be without you and returns with apologies.
If this is the case ,then you need to set him down and tell him straight up, that you love him and want to be with him, but that you will not put up with him coming and going out of your life, tell him that it hurts your feelings that he doesn't believe that the baby is his, but that you would be more than glad to have a DNA test to put his mind at ease.
Tell him that just because you are having a baby together does not mean you have to get married, however he needs to take the time to figure out what he wants. Tell him it is tuff enough to be pregnant with out all the added bull sh*t and stress that he is giving you. Put your foot down and tell him either step up or step out.
2006-08-06 21:51:39 · answer #2 · answered by angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well basically it sounds like you enjoy being a victim. If you are pregnant with a girl, your daughter will repeat the same "victim" cycle she sees from her mother and will let men walk all over her as you do. I hope you didn't allow yourself to get pregnant thinking it was a way to "hold on" to this man. Most girls make that mistake. I guarantee he has other girlfriends who are skinny and pretty, but he knows you're the "old faithful" girlfriend he can come back to when he's done playing......and you let him.
2006-08-06 21:46:49 · answer #3 · answered by Kyra B. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For the sake of your baby maybe its for the best that you two are not together. If he truly wanted to be with you he would not leave you. He keeps coming back because he cannot find anything better. If you stay with him it will not be a healthy relationship and your baby deserves to live in a calm household with out all of the drama. It is best that the two of you stay civil and have a strong friendship but not a relationship.
2006-08-06 21:39:41 · answer #4 · answered by chairkiss_silver 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no--youre not stupid, just hopeful. However, this is an ugly pattern that he will continue to use as long as you let him. let him have the DNA test, then chill. dont contact him in any way until he proves himself.
bottom line right now is all about you and that baby. keeping healthy is what u MUST focus on now. the stress hes bringing on isnt good for you or it.
best of luck to u =)
2006-08-06 21:40:59 · answer #5 · answered by Duckie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE DON' WANT U GURL,HE DON' WANT YOU!
if he's tellin' you that he wants a DNA nu are sure his the baby daddy and he alsways goes n comes back,then he apologizes 4 that........that aint good.
he now feels that (probably his friends) told him that once he starts to take care of your baby, things are goin to change and he won't be hanging around...bla bla)
he's having doubts about everything,yes,you luv him,he's yo baby daddy,but i don' think he is ready to settle down
GUYS!!!!! he probably hasn't heard anythin' bout u buthe's jus' making everything up.
you are too obsessed to notice becuz you keep takin' him back,but be careful,i don't think he might be sticking around long enuf.
you know huys r stupid,you are the one havin' the baby n it's you whose life is going to change the most, but.......
i just wish you all luck,will b praying 4 you too.
2006-08-06 21:49:33 · answer #6 · answered by gabi c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when a man knows that he can step in and out of your life without having to suffer any concequenses they will do it without blinking an eye. you have set the rules for him, and the rules are that he can do whatever as long as he comes back to you. you need to let him know that there is a new set of rules, disrespect me, walk out on me, or call me a hoe (re:the dna test) again and you will be out on your ***!! tell him that you will raise the baby on your own if you have to, that you dont need him in your life. im sorry to say this but i dont think that it would be a good idea for you to be together. while you are pregnant, your baby is feeling all the emotions that you are feeling, if he is hurting you your baby is feeling this pain. also once the baby is born do you want him/her to see his/her father walking in and out of his/her life. you need to move on and be by yourself so that you can concentrate on whats best for you and the baby. remember he/she is your main concern now, not him!! good luck!!
2006-08-06 21:46:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ur not! u just LOVE him so MUCH.. thats its hard to see his mistakes its like ur blinded by them and knowing that u trully love him that makes u forgive & forget .. ur just too nice..
and if he's asking for dna test i thought he believed then why? just because of what people says i mean that bs* ya know why does he have to listen to them he's suppose to believe u and if he cant he got issues..
talk to him tell him how u really feel i know its so easy for someone like me who aint in ur situation to tell u this but i also know that it is really hard to do the actions.... but atleast u gotta try and see what happens u dont wanna be with someone who keeps leaving u .etc.. even though u love him lets face it u really have to do this and find out the truth..how he really feels about u etc...
goodluck*with ur baby
2006-08-06 21:46:14 · answer #8 · answered by yumi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to talk about it seriously. I guess you are both confused with yur status now. Are you on the right age for marriage? The guy is obviously scared to commit. Did you already tell your parents or to his parents? You have to know what do they have to say. In the first place, the guy should not doubt its his child you are bearing. You have to check his feelings for you. Hope this helps. God bless you and your child!
2006-08-06 21:42:42 · answer #9 · answered by justurangel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
k get the DNA test and when it says the answers go from there. if he is the father then make him pay to help u out and if he is not then move on! i don't think u should let him back in again.....good luck girl
2006-08-06 21:38:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's a jerk. he is not mature and he is not going to be ready to be a father when this child is born. you cannot depend on him. he is very unstable and probably f*cking every little young thing that crosses his path, you are better off without him. if he does not believe that the child that you are carrying is his, then he does not deserve to be with you or his child
good luck
2006-08-06 21:39:53 · answer #11 · answered by one_sera_phim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋