guys..i dunno what to say to this guy..he's a nice bloke..
he's very sensible,decent and a brainiac,too..he might not be that handsome but he knows how to treat women right..
the problem is,he's been courting me for 3 months now but i don't and can't feel anything for him..i really can't say too much negative from him except for the fact that he's a bit pushy on some things...i wanted to tell him that i don't feel anything without making him feel so hurt..though i know it's very impossible to happen..im the only girl he has ever courted but i don't want to give in just to make him happy.im not selfish but..you know what i mean and feel..so what do you think is the best way to tell him that?
2006-08-06 10:26:38 · 9 answers · asked by peek-a-boo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i kept on showing hints that i just like him as a friend but he seems to ignore it..i can't even tell him how i really feel..that i love someone else..coz the way he treats me..i just can't stand hurting him..are there still any other options aside from being straightforward?
2006-08-06 10:42:04 · update #1
You're not selfish to get out of a relationship that you're not into. I think it was nice of you to give it a shot since he's a nice guy, but if you don't feel anything for him (romantically) then that's the way it is. It's going to hurt him. No getting around that. You need to tell him what a good person he is as you tell him that you just don't feel anything between the two of you. Don't do any half-*** break up though. Don't let him down so easy that he thinks there's still a chance in the future for you two. Be as nice as you possibly can, as it seems he deserves that much, but you have to get the point accross. Good luck to you both.
Update: The fact that you've dropped several hints that you want to just be friends only just adds to how much you need to just come out and be honest with him. Like I'd mentioned about a half-*** break up, he may just not 'get it' until you lay it out very clearly for him. Be as nice as you can, but the truth comes before kindness in this case. Otherwise this will be an on going problem for you and him.
2006-08-06 10:32:27 · answer #1 · answered by Olivia B 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
There is no easy way to tell anyone that you don't feel anything for them.You cannot put feelings where there aren't any and trying to avoid hurting someone is often impossible.If he's not happy with you as a friend, you should be honest with him about your feelings, tell him how much you have appreciated his attention and what a nice guy he is, then if necessary, end the relationship.You need to move on and find someone you can really love and you need to be fair to him, he needs to move forward to find someone who appreciates a nice guy with good manners, a rare quality these days! Whatever you decide, do it quickly, the longer you leave it the harder it will be for him.You seem to be a nice person, who cares about her partners and good for you for giving the relationship a go in the first place, it's not a fault to have negative feelings way into any relationship, it's just the way it sometimes turns out.Good luck to you in the future. Orrell from Wigan
2006-08-06 18:00:22 · answer #2 · answered by hawkeye 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him how he thinks things are going n every point he mekes you make your hel get the hint. Tell himhe will meet a more suitable woman soon enough and you will stay friends. Try and set him up with someoe else. Or send a text to your freind saying this but send it to him by accident hel prob just avoid you then.. Its nasty but its easy.
2006-08-06 17:37:29 · answer #3 · answered by Laura C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's best just to be straightforward and honest with him. Just tell him that you are not interested. It may hurt his feelings, but he will appreciate knowing it and then he won't have to waste any more energy/time on someone who's not interested back.
2006-08-06 17:31:26 · answer #4 · answered by ctwitch24 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is always best. But maybe you havn't given this enough time either. Three months isn't very long. But well, you know your heart. Maybe yours is just a freindship relationship as compared to a love relationship!
2006-08-06 17:38:49 · answer #5 · answered by Carolyn T 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What ever way you tell him it will hurt you cant avoid it, I wouldn't be surprised if in some ways he already knows, its hard to hide true feelings and I doubt you have. THE LONGER YOU LEAVE IT THE HARDER IT GETS
2006-08-06 17:37:28 · answer #6 · answered by scatty 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you are finding it that difficult Iknow it sounds bad but why dont you do something that you know he would not approve of so he dumps you it is a really bad and selfish way to do but it might work
2006-08-06 17:38:55 · answer #7 · answered by stephy200125 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
telling him is a good idea over the phone
2006-08-06 17:33:06 · answer #8 · answered by ziegler910 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
l think telling him soon would be the greatest idea
2006-08-06 17:35:54 · answer #9 · answered by Lil mama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋