I am asking just to see how many girls have been or are right now. Yesterday my cousins' body was found shot to death, by her abusive ex-boyfriend. She left him and he found her and shot her to death, she was only 24. Please if you are or know anyone who is get them help.
2006-08-06 10:18:54 · 17 answers · asked by messijessi 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The most dangerous time for a woman involved with an abusive man is when she actually leaves him and shortly thereafter. Unfortunately, most girls/women think they can change or "help" them. There are as many forms of abuse as there are men. Psychological, financial, mental, physical - you name it.
Go to your local Domestic Violence center, or Sheriff's Department and obtain written material for her to read. If she lives with the guy - DO NOT do this in front of him or at their home.
You look it over first, so you know what you can do to help. Make sure you get the good old Domestic Violence Wheel. Go through it with her - point out where she fits on it.
Don't push it. Women MUST reach the realization that they are being abused by themselves. Telling them over and over what a rotten bastard he is will only drive her closer to him. Good Luck! You're doing a good thing.
2006-08-06 10:30:36 · answer #1 · answered by 34th B.G. - USAAF 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not all abusive relationships leave bruises, or are physically violent. I lived in a verbally & psychologically abusive marriage for most of the 25+ years I was married, but never realized it until I became more familiar with 12 Step/Recovery concepts.
Most of this is learned from previous generations (or by not learning what a healthy relationship is really like).
The pressure on women to 'find a man' can be unreasonable for many cultures, and can lead to bad choices.
2006-08-06 17:29:29 · answer #2 · answered by OSCookieDelta 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in an abusive relationship at 16. Now every girlfriend this guy has ends up coming to ME asking what to do about him. I left when it started getting physical; it started with control and escalated from there. Still, to this day, he abuses the girl he's currently with, and she happily puts up with it. I just don't get it. We all need to teach our daughters to have higher standards and watch out for the warning signs. We also need to love them always, no matter what they do, so they don't run to the arms of men like this. They need to know that love doesn't leave bruises.
2006-08-06 17:28:32 · answer #3 · answered by ?princesshousewife? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I was married for 34 years to an abusive "Christian" man. I was raised in an abusive home so thought that this was just how it is when your married. The man rules the roast - however he deems necessary. The church really does a disservice to women by encouraging subservance to the husband. I also believe children should respect their parents BUT abusing them is not how respect is gained. I have much regret, sorrow and guilt about how my children had to exist in this home. I finally made the move and am no longer afraid to go home.
2006-08-06 17:33:33 · answer #4 · answered by happynow 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes I have had 4 of them so I can feel for her fear that she must have gone through. I am sorry to hear of her death but she is in no pain now . she is in a better place.
I have bin abused all my life and lived in fear for 40 years and that is a long time . my sympathies for your lose . I feel her name starts with a J or Jennifer Jenny Jan something like that and she had a reddish shine to her hair or it was red . very beautiful girl worked in some kind of office. I feel children did she have any or was she around them allot . wavy hair she had green and blue eyes they changed color . who is Lisa or Lorry . a L name she wants to send a message about a par of earrings she had given some one and want that person to were them as much as they can in her memory she tells me to tell you she is fine every thing is great she is at Peace . she also said that she will be a t a birthday party that is coming up soon so if you feel a worm breeze cross your face it is her . love you all are her last message.
2006-08-06 17:38:50 · answer #5 · answered by lois k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im so sorry for your loss.
Yes i have been in an abusive relationship, my life is still under threat but i have learnt to live with it. Thankfully i managed to survive the initial attempts and they are less threatening now. I think they are over but i can never let my guard down.
My thoughts are with you at this sad time. TWO WOMEN A WEEK ARE MURDERED BY THERE PARTNER OR EX PARTNER.
2006-08-06 17:31:35 · answer #6 · answered by dlauksa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its good that you chose to come on here and try to make people yet more aware of how bad it can be.
Very often when something horrible happens to someone their family members find some kind of peace in attempting to make others more aware, volunteering for the cause, or otherwise working toward attempting to solve the problem.
This is an awful thing for your family, and the abuse problem is just so horrible, isn't it...
2006-08-06 17:29:59 · answer #7 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am very sorry to hear about your cousin but i was in an verbal abuse realtionship and now my self esteem is really low i need to go out more and have fun to get my self esteem back
2006-08-06 19:08:04 · answer #8 · answered by cowanelmo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Without sounding rude I'll bet this wasn't the first time it had happened... She should have left the 1st time he kicked her ***... How long can you play in the road and elicit sympathy when you get run over... He is a scoundrel.. And she's a little stupid.. or at least she was.. sorry..
2006-08-06 17:28:00 · answer #9 · answered by j.swaney 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's pretty harsh. Men too can also be in abusive relationship. Women are not always the only victims.
2006-08-06 17:24:21 · answer #10 · answered by NïghtStalkër_666 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋