How do I get my 2 yr old child to stop crawling into bed with me in the middle of the night?

Question

She breastfeeds still and that complicates things a little more. I'm not able to get the sleep that I need and our schedules are really messed up. My older children are getting ready to start school again and we need to get into a routine.

Answer 1

child led weaning is best. there is no need to wean at this age. she is still getting a lot of benefits from breastmilk and she will grow up secure and self confident because she wasnt forced to be independent when only two years old.
as for the sleeping issue, i know at times it is tough and you may not sleep as well with her coming into your room but she needs you and probably sleeps better with you. try to look at the situation in a positive way. she is still your baby and needs to be close to you. in most cultures kids sleep with parents or older siblings for several years. lots of americans think that babies need to learn independence... and lots of americans are in therapy for issues like they cant maintain relationships or feel too much anxiety or depression. it is normal and healthy to sleep with your child. they feel secure and loved and learn to trust. all good things.

Answer 2

Does she nurse during the night? SHe is old enough to make it through the night without nursing. Does she nurse to get to sleep? I would work on that first. Create a new bedtime routine where she goes to sleep, in her bed, totally awake. It can be a tape of songs you have made for her, or a special book, or, just about anything that helps to soothe her- without nursing.

Then, when she's used to that routine, use it during the night. Take her back to her bed and start up the going-to-sleep tape and leave the room. This may all take a while, but, it will be worth it in the end.

You can then still nurse during the day- but NOT at nap times to get her to sleep. That would be too confusing!

Best wishes from a grandma-aged person

Answer 3

I had the same problem with my son. I wanted to stop nursing after a year, then 18 months came and went.. Finally I put my foot down and decided he would Not nurse past his second birthday.

It was incredibly hard, but basically, I had to stay away from him as much as possible, but for just a couple of days. I had other family members 'deal' with him at the times he would normally nurse. It just took 2 days of not nursing to kick the habit. After that, I just needed to remind him verbally that 'we don't do that anymore'.

Is there another parent in the house that can deflect the child off of you at night? Remember, it will only take a couple of nights. If your child comes to your bed, don't be there. Sleep somewhere else and have another adult take care of the child during those 'high need' moments till the nursing is a thing of the past. Another adult can take the child back to her own bed and soothe her to sleep.

Be strong and don't cave. Think with your head and not your heart for a couple days cause you know it's best for everyone at this time. Good luck!

Answer 4

First: by all means you've breastfed her long enough. Cut her off now. If she crawls into bed with you take her back to her bed.
She'll scream and throw a temper tantrum, but be persistant and talk to her very firm. This will only last a couple of nights-maybe a week and she'll get used to it and by the time school starts you have a routine

Answer 5

A 2 year old doesn't not need to be breastfed during the night; at this age she should be sleeping thru the night. Seems ridiculous to me. Every time she gets into your bed, put her right back into her own bed. May have a few rough nights ahead of you but you need to break this very bad habit.

Answer 6

Well 1st please stop breastfeeding a 2 year old! Thats the 1st problem you are treating her as if she is a baby so she is acting like one. Did you used to let her sleep with you? If so thats your 2nd mistake. Once you say its ok to do something its hard for them to understand its not ok later. I don't have much advice for you my son was off the bottle at 11 months and has NEVER slept in me & my husbands bed. I have heard to may horror stories so we decided that would not be a good idea. We put him in a bassinet next to the bed when he was 1st born and has been sleeping in his room since he was 2 1/2 months old. I just wish you the best of luck and say please stop it now if not there will be much bigger problems you won't be able to handle later on.

Answer 7

Well, at the age of 2 she does not need to nurse in the middle of the night anymore! if you really want to keep her in her bed, then you will need to block her door somehow. We used a baby gate, then he learned to climb it, so we put a 2nd gate up on top of the other, and that did the trick. We had several rough nights, and we did have tears, but after about a week, he was doing fine!

Answer 8

Can you get her off the breast without making it traumatic?? That would probably fix the sleeping problem. My 2 and 1/2 year old still wakes up in the night and it is hard because my one year old who still nurses does it too. Try to break the night nursing habit. Try to get her to just cuddle at night and that will be a big step toward her not being in your bed at night. Do it gradually.

Answer 9

You don't. Just enjoy those precious times when ur cuddling and sleeping with ur child life goes by so fast and they grow too quickly. I have 4 children and i slept with everyone of them until about 5yrs old. We carry these children inside of us for 9mos. and then we look to get rid of them right away. What's up with that. As long as they are not with us in bed when they get married then ur ok.

Answer 10

awww... isn't that cute? if i were you, i'd rather allow her to crawl into bed with me... i mean, she just probably wants to be with her mommy! just be patient with her and don't force her to stop doing it because she might get the wrong impression of it. i'm sorry to sound rude or something, but you're a mom and mom's supposed to make sacrifices even if it means less sleep and keeping up with schedules!