How 2 make my mother happy?

Question

My mom grew up in poverty.When young,she worked hard 2 earn money so that her brothers and sisters can get proper education.When she married, it was not exactly a happy marriage but she held on for the sake of me & my brother. My father died 10 years back & she had to work again after a gap of 25 years.I became an engineer and my brother a doctor because of her hard work. i had a love marriage 3 years ago,not exactly against her wishes but she was not exactly happy with it either.Now, after a big fight, my wife has walked out of my home.and my wife has flatly refused to try to reconcile.
my mom, in her old age, has to witness all this. She is upset all day. I WANT 2 MAKE HER HAPPY, BRING SOME CHEER IN HER LIFE. HOW DO I DO THAT. PLEASE ADVICE, PLEASE HELP ME.

Answer 1

There is some people you can't make happy no matter what you do. Your Mother wants the best for you, and she is disappointed your marriage didn't work out. My mother in law was not a happy woman, she very rarely enjoyed herself. She had a hard life, and I am not sure if she just didn't think she deserved to be happy and enjoy life. Maybe she wants to see her children happy, and that gives her pleasure. So, why not ask her out on a lunch date. Tell her to put on her prettiest outfit, and treat her to a nice day. Show her you are going to be okay. Talk to her over lunch, and tell her you are sorry she is so upset. That your wife doesn't want to try and work things out, and you are going to move on with your life. That's it's not the end of the world. You might be hurting, but she raised you to be strong and independent and so you can deal with the tough things life throws at you. Thank her for doing this too. Life has not been all that kind to her, but she survived. And to have raised 2 sons with good educations, and good jobs, she should very proud of herself. Remind her of this. She is more depressed about you being hurt then anything. So please show her you are going to survive this, and going to be better for it in the long run. If you wife runs from a fight, no matter how big it is, then you need to find a woman-that has sticking power-like MOM! She didn't turn tail and run, she made things work. You are very lucky to have such a Mother, and she is very blessed with a caring son, who is worried when he is going thru his own crisis. God bless us all.............

Answer 2

First glad you have a great mother, Second since you and your mother are so close , and because she did not like your wife, is that why you and her are spilting up. It can be very hard to be in the middle. Having to please both sides.. I ve been in a situation similar takes a toll on you. If you want your wife back you have to work things out . Your mother is your mother but your wife is your wife. Just keep them apart. Maybe jeauous over you from both sides. Your mother is a very stong person. I know all she wants is to see you happy. But just doing what you feel is right will make her happy. Don't make her the cause of you two spilting up, If things are tease around there maybe take your mother some where to get her mine off things. Then when you come back start fresh. Good Luck Pem

Answer 3

I am sooooooooo sorry that happened!!!

My grandmother grew up in poverty, that includes beans everyday and fighting people so they wouldn't steal her money or food. I see where you are going here.Your mother is probably about to break down, before anything that will end her life in a tragic way:
1. Ask your mother why she thinks she needs to work still.
2. Try to talk her into going with your family to a awesome vacation somewhere, she might relax.
3. Invite your wife and tell her that y'all need to talk about this, let her know you still love her!
4. Talk to your mother about your wife, she needs to get used to the fact that you are going to get married and have a family of your own.
5. Follow below what I used to do when my mom or dad or both were sick:
Monday:
Breakfast-
Make pankakes, gritz, bacon, juice
Lunch-
Sandwich of choice, water or soda, music
Dinner-
Any kind of noodles, soda or wine
Dessert-
Choclate cake, butter cake, or Angel Fruit Cake

Tuesday:
Morning-
Music to wake them up in the morning
Brunch
Dinner-
Hot dog, beans, soda

Wednesday:
Breakfast-
cereal, juice, coffee
Lunch-
some fun restaurant
Dinner-
Pizza with a good movie
Movie-
Any comedy movies, popcorn, soda or water

Thursday-
Breakfast-
I Hop
Lunch-
Meet your wife soemwhere with your brother, and mother and have a good lnch together.
Dinner-
Have a barbacue invite the neighbors, find a nice woman tha t your moother could be closer friends with for her social life.

Friday:
Sleep in
Lunch- Go to a take out and have a small picnic with your mom and talk about stuff.
Dinner- Go to a fancy restaurant, go early though they get crowded.

I hope that helps! If I could do all that by myself when I was a teen, you can do it 1,000 times better!!! Good luck!!

Answer 4

Archer!? Why haven't you just tried all the other 50 answers you've gotten here? Why do you ask the same exact question over and over and over and over again? Is she even "cheer-up-able?" Some people wallow gladly in their misery. In that case once you've just been good to her, you've got to end your concern there. She may be manipulating you. Are you and your brother taking care of her and she just sits at home all day? Take her to a Senior Day Care Center where she can make friends with other people who have raised a family, lost their spouses and suffered as she is.

She wasn't happy with your "love marriage" well...like I said, maybe she is beyond reproach. Don't let it eat at you. Even the bible warns against vain, repetitious consideration being taken when someone is a bottomless pit for need and worry. You went very far back to explain your Mom, I think you are way into one another. I love my Mother very much too so I understand your plight and your concern. But she's worrying you to death, Archer. And trying to worry herself to death, too. Call around and check here http://www.seniorresource.com/states.htm and be done worrying about it. Print out all your answers and do a few and don't ask anymore. Repetition must run in the family. Peace.

Answer 5

Take her out to dinner for a diversion. Maybe send her on vacation with a friend.
Pay for an online singles account for your mother. If she had a relationship of her own she wouldn't be so concerned about yours.

Find out what you could have done differently with your wife by going to a family therapist. This may work towards reconciliation. If not hopefully you won't make the same mistakes again with your next wife.

Answer 6

Try seek your wife understanding on your concern and feeling towards your mother. If your wife refuse to communicate with your mother, then at least allow you to continue to care about your mother. Just give what you think the best and your love to your mother. You can try ignore and dun bother about how your mother feel about your wife.

Cause your mother spend the hardwork to raise you and your brother, not to entertain your wife or she is required to understand how your wife feel.

I think she is old and have done enough, it is a bit too much for her to even consider your wife feeling.

The best will be keep the distance between your wife and your mother.

Should your wife become so unreasonable till not allowing you spend time for your mother, then you should consider is your wife too restrictive or demanding, and negotiate for your own right and freedom. Should she not listen, maybe should consider breaking up for a period, cause you need a person who share and understand your feeling, walking down together for the remaining years. So, if your wife is unreasonable, imagine, how you going to live in the remaining years... If you chosen to give in to your wife and ignore your mother, likely you will live regretly for the rest of the years.

Hope your wife is reasonable :)

Answer 7

pick up the pieces, man!! yes, your wife left you... but your not dead yet! you are an engineer and you have a career to pursue. life is not just about a successful marriage. it is all about every aspect of every person as a whole.
take a look at your life, and you will find a lot more reasons to be happy.
and when you have emotional and character stability, this, i believe, would give you the boost to continue life with a high level of contentment.
this is what our mothers would pray for us to have... OUR OWN STABILITY AND HAPPINESS.
and if you are happy and content... your mom would surely feel the same.

Answer 8

Since your wife dosn't want to get back together spend that time with you mother. Occasionaly take her on walks in the park, luch dates, shopping trips, talking, or just hang out with her. sounds like she needs some laughter and a little attention. Maybe she would just enjoy spending some time with you. You should not hold yourself hostage for your mother feelings, all you can do is let her know how much you appreciate how hard she worked to make you who you are today.

Answer 9

Your mother just wants to see you happy and knows that you are very upset by the breakup of your marriage. All you can really do is try to move on with your life. Perhaps one day you will meet someone else who will want to spend the rest of her life with you, and will give your mother some grandchildren, which is probably another thing that would make her happy.

Good luck.

Answer 10

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