I want to thank you all for the advices and the responds that you have given me on my situation. I met this lady in one of the marriage websites. In fact we haven''t met in person, she lives thousands of miles away from me. We are on the verge of getting married and in view of that, I recently sent to her a $600.00 ladies gold wrist watch, an Engagement Bible, Engagement Ring and some other clothing likewise some to her two children. It was when one day I dreamt that she is having an affair with someone who happens to live in her house. Though she denied and after putting presure on her, she admitted the whole truth. Though she keeps on telling me she loves me. She have sacked this guy from the house. because the father knows about our planned marriage, likewise the pastor and the church elders. it was just yesterday, when she told me of her HIV+ thing. Though I have forgiven her of her lies, but my headache is that before knowing all these lies, I promised to marry her. Help me.
2006-08-06 02:44:51 · 18 answers · asked by Abban 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Speak with the church elders or pastor. You need counseling about serveral issues here. I don't know the full background but this sounds like a very complicating situation. If she has broken your trust, be honest about it with yourself and her. Trust is something that is hard to regain once lost.
2006-08-12 05:36:46 · answer #1 · answered by pretty_brown_eyes 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't marry someone who lies to you. A realtionship should be on the up and up from the beginning....and don't feel like you have to marry her just because you promised already. I didn't catch your part one but I am thinking you found out about her most of her lies after your marriage promise??? Write off the stuff you gave her as experience ( I doubt you will get it back) and don't live your life with someone you are always going to have to wonder about. Best of luck.
2006-08-06 02:49:47 · answer #2 · answered by traveler 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
man! look at the logical side of the business not the promise u made. u made promise for the rightous girl whom u respected and loved or maybe yet love her. But see who broke the trust. In a relationship only trust & faith (ofcourse based on love) counts n nothing else. If one of these gets wavy it is tough to hold a relationship let alone keeping promise. It's not the question of HIV+thing but how did she get it? why wasn't she true to her love? and when did she come to know about her being HIV infacted? why did she tell u so late?
I think once u get the real answers to these questions u'll be able get on with the life.
2006-08-06 03:18:10 · answer #3 · answered by krishp 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need help. So here i am. DON'T MARRY HER! Period. If she cheats once she'll cheat again.
1) You two aren't even married yet and you're already having 'TRUST' issues.
2) You sent her money and jewelry, so now she thinks she's got u hooked. She can say whatever she wants and you're gonna be a sucker and fall for it.
3) Promises are meant to be broken....so break it dammit.
4) If you don't want HIV, then don't marry her
5) If you're thousands of miles away, she can cheat on you all the time and you won't know about it.
6) She took your money, treated her man to a nice dinner, had a nice cozy fire thanks to the bible you sent, and pawned the damn ring to get the rest of her HIV PILLS>
GET OVER IT
2006-08-13 08:14:12 · answer #4 · answered by vincent_o_mejia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not have to marry her just because you promise marriage. Do not be a fool since a liar is always going to be a liar. Move on get rid of her. You do not need any stress in your life. The girl is a loser. Could you trust her? I wouldn't.
Are you willing to take care of a girl with HIV?
Time to think about yourself. Sometimes we all like to create our own miseries. Only you can stop and get rid of her. Stress is not worth it. Find another girl that will respect and care for you.
2006-08-06 02:57:32 · answer #5 · answered by leyte6519 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is just using you and you are NOT obligated to go through with this marriage. Speak to the pastor and tell him you have found out she has cheated and lied. Maybe you did promise to marry, but not under these circumstances. Don't do it. You will regret it every day of your life.
2006-08-13 20:18:50 · answer #6 · answered by busybody12 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She doesn't sound trustworthy. If she really loved you she wouldn't lie about everything. You cannot marry someone who you know lies and you can't trust. What kind of marriage would that be. Constantly wondering what is the truth or a lie.
2006-08-06 04:58:30 · answer #7 · answered by maejul 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you going to get married to someone that you have never seen before? Don't me crazy and get married to her...If she lied to you then she will lie now. But you promised her. Thats why you should make a promise that you can't keep. All I can say is follow your heart and not your mind.
Good luck!!
2006-08-14 02:32:17 · answer #8 · answered by Ashley Babi15 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I promised to marry her?
Come on. Tell her you have changed you mind with the latest information. Do not screw yourself.
The $600 was a cheap lesson. Frankly sounded like a scam. Work on yourself and find a real woman close to you.
2006-08-13 18:40:40 · answer #9 · answered by SuperKdog 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You made the promise of marriage under false pretences. She is not the person she pretended to be. She lied and cheated. You don't have any obligation to marry her now.
2006-08-06 02:54:05 · answer #10 · answered by Cheryl K 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋