is it ok to date sum1 11 yrs older than me?

Question

i am 14, but other people on here have put that age doesn't matter so...

we don't doubt it, just my mates were talking the other day and one of em mentioned they had a 20 yr old boyfriend n said it was too much of an age difference.

do u think my mum knows about this???

he's not trying 2 force me into a relationship, i'm the one who wants it. he said he'll do whatever i want and if that means waiting till i'm 18 he's perfectly fine with it

im not a little kid, ive nearly left skool for gods sake, i said 14 not 4!

i know its against the law to consent to sex at my age, but can we at least have a relationship where we just kiss n stuff?

we weren't planning a full-time relationship until 3 or 4 yrs, but just wanted to know about basic dating, is that illegal?

Answer 1

Of course it is,if you like them why not?
Age is nothing but a number!!!!

Answer 2

I think so @ your age. But then again i don't know you...my friend is a simular age and is goin out with someone 14 years older! To me this is pretty weird and don't seem right but when two people like each other what can you do.
I'm 18 and found a 26 year old, i gave it a go but it didn't feel right somehow.
Older guys are better in a way because they MAY have more money and MAY be more mature.
In my opinion i prefer guys my age or slightly older as they are going through the same things as you are, and are @ the same stage in life as you are.
Everyones different it's up to you, but he's probably just after one thing ;-)

Answer 3

WOW

hon no ages don't matter you are right about that but I think if you are dating a 25 or 26 year old guy then there is something wrong with him he sees a young girl just learning how to become an adult just finding her own identity who isn't sure about herself or the world in which she lives and sees her as an easy target to be exploited

however now that I have said my piece i will say this

hon there is nothing wrong with been friends with this guy and if when you are older 17 - 18 - 19 you both still feel the 'same way' about each other then I would say that there is nothing wrong with then going ahead and having a boy friend girl friend relationship but right now you are young and you need to be sure that you feel this way and it is not just your body growing up (sorry don't mean to make you feel small) and that he feels this way about you and he is not just trying to abuse or use you

one more thing if he really loves you then he will understand and he WILL wait and don't forget even when you think you got no body you have always got your parents and despite the fact that i bet sometimes you think they are nags they do love you and they will be there when you need them

best of luck

Answer 4

Why on earth would someone at 26 want to date a 14 year old child in the first place,and no matter how mature you think you are, in the eyes of the law your still a child and will be until your 16th birthday.

Do you seriously think this 26 year old man is going to wait about until your legally old enough to have sex with him,i dont think so!!

For your own good i`d tell him that you dont want to see him again even as just friends.I know that people say that age doesn`t matter and i truly believe that myself if it`s 2 adults but not at your young age.

Answer 5

At 14 you have time to think about this, there's no rush. Everyone is different in how they view what they feel is a good partner. I think he's sensible saying he'll wait because in UK the law says it too. You are not able to consent to sex at your age and he can get in serious trouble with the law. I would hope that you'd take time to think whether you really want this now, it may seem exciting / grown up, but it can also be a let down if you're not mature enough emotionally to cope with it.

Answer 6

seriously if your 14 and hes 25 id run like the wind.......i did a similar thing when i was 16 he was 29 it just ends up in a mess, if he is honestly serious about you with no alterior agenda then he would respect you and be your friend only untill you become older(at least over 16 but preferably 18) before he should make an advance on you....but i really suggest you steer clear.

Answer 7

That depends on your age. If you are over 16 then it is fine. I was 17 and married someone 13 years older than me. We are still together after 27 years. My sister married someone 17 years older and they are still together 31 years later.

It will also depend on whether you are female or male.....unfortunately it STILL seems the case that if you are male it is not looked at as a bad thing and even gets you a congratulatory slap on the back and big smiles from your mates......being a female will get you dirty looks, gossips and nasty comments from society at large.

Answer 8

my dad was 11 years older than my mum, I think they met when mum was about your age. But I dont think they went out together till she was 17 or 18. Take your time, whats the rush, live life, have fun. Let youself grow up..

Answer 9

well it does depend on ur age. but u cant deny how u feel bout sum1. if it feels wrong thats cuz it is. if u n this person rly care bout each other him/her will wait 4 u 2 b old enough 2 date. but if u r legally able 2 date him/her then go ahead.

Answer 10

No not at 14, I realise that is going to upset you, and you will not listen and you will do exactly what you want but this is something you will regret much later in your life, sorry. You and this person have to understand that if relations take place this is illegal. Take care

Answer 11

you can date hoo ever you want even with a big age difrence. once I saw on a magisne this guy which is 70 married a 20 year old