been with bf for 6yrs should i give in.......?

Question

my bf wants to get married in a registry office as we have not alot of money, i always said i intend on marrying only once and want a big church wedding, what do you reckon, should i give in or try to start saving for my dream wedding?

Answer 1

Compromise. You could still dress up and have a wonderful wedding at a registry office. Some friends of mine got married at http://www.eastpark.co.uk/ which is a registry office/ conference centre but you wouldn't know it from the building and grounds! If you look around I'm sure you'll find something suitable in your area.

Alternatively you could have a church wedding and a cheaper reception, such as champagne picnic, BBQ or even afternoon tea style (tea, cake and sarnies).

Hope that helps a bit.

Answer 2

If there is a reason to hurry your wedding, you can always go ahead with the registry procedure and conduct the wedding and reception at a later date, by then you've probably saved up some money for your dream church wedding. A wedding at the church and a buffet in the court yard wouldn't cost too much. It sure would be cheaper than having it in a hotel or some place exotic like a beach resort. If you've a big family, I'm sure many would pitch in to help contribute a few dishes that is if you can't afford to cater. If it's something you think you'll regret not having, then be sure to throw yourself a wedding to celebrate. Like you said, you intend on marrying once, so go ahead, make it special and memorable, but most of all, keep in mind your budget is tight so stay within your means. You don't and you shouldn't need to over spend to have a nice wedding. All the best!

Answer 3

What is more important to you - the fact you get married to your bf or you having your dream wedding? It could be another 4 or years before you get married if you want to go the whole hog with the fairytale wedding. It would be beautiful but do you want to wait that long?

Here's an idea - get married at the registry office like your bf suggested. Then have your wedding blessed with a church ceremony and a big party when you have the money.

Good luck with this decision. I have just got engaged to my boyfriend and I know how exciting it is to dream about your ideal wedding. I'm sure it will be wonderful, whatever you decide to do.

Answer 4

So you're going to save up the equivelent of a year's pay and then spend it giving yourself a party in which you will be your own guest of honor? Does your BF consider this a worthwhile expense, or is he the sort who feels the money would be better spent buying a home, or on some other major purchase? I'm sure many people feel differently, but my own opinion is that someone whose idea of ultimate happiness is a day spent at a big party, even spent being the center of attention at a very marvelous big party, is too immature to get married. (Sorry, but you asked.)

My advice is to
(1) start saving for SOMETHING in your future, something that may or may not be an elaborate wedding, and
(2) put off the registry office vows -- feeling like you are giving up a dream to marry your fellow isn't a good start to a marriage.

Answer 5

Well, that's up to you. Don't do something you don't want to do just to give in to someone else. However, keep in mind that the most important thing is the marriage itself, not the wedding. A wedding is just one day, really just a few hours and people pay for it long afterwards. I know it's every little girl's dream to have a Cinderella fairytale style wedding, but I think sometimes the larger weddings seem to lose focus on the whole reason for the marriage...like girls turning into bridezillas, etc. Just ask yourself, is it worth it to wait until you can afford a large wedding? What happens if you never save enough money to have the wedding you want? I think love and the commitment to your significant other is more important than the actual wedding. You'll be just as married if you have a court house wedding as you will be if you have a milliion dollar wedding and you won't be thousands of dollars in debt at the start of your life together. But, you have to make the decision on what you feel you want. Just make sure it's what you want as well.

Answer 6

Save your money for a wedding, you'll regret it if you don't have your big day. There are ways to save on the costs of weddings. You could have everything you want but with 100 or less guests and it will be cheaper. You can have a great wedding for under $10,000. Plus, what about your parents and his parents helping to pay for the wedding?

Answer 7

A big wedding doesn't need to be really expensive:

You can hire a hall rather than a hotel and either do the catering yourself, get friends/family to do it or buy in a cold buffet that you set out yourself.

Pretty, simple jugs or vases of fresh flowers are lovely, especially for a summer wedding and a fraction of the cost of a florist. Flowering potted plants look good too, and you can put them on your windowsill after the wedding!

Ivy makes a lovely decoration and your friends and neighbours may be only to happy to help.

Have a bar instead of all free drinks, so your guests buy their own drinks. Your local pub may offer this service.

Hire a good local pub band to provide entertainment (make sure you go and see them to find out if you like them).

Buy nice summer dresses for your bridesmaids rather than expensive custom made ones. The bridesmaids can pay for their own dresses (or their mothers can if they are children!)

A lovely dress from Jigsaw or Monsoon would be a cheaper option than a merangue style wedding dress, and just as special.

You'll need to save up a bit but not thousands and thousands of pounds. If you get help from your friends and family - after all everyone loves a wedding and most people are happy to help out with somethin g like that.

Answer 8

if you have been with him for six years, whats the rush to get married, save up for a year or two then get married, you may regret having a registry office wedding if it has been your dream to have a big white wedding,

Answer 9

Try selling one of your kidneys. You could make maybe £17,000 or more. That'll cover the cost of a huge church wedding nowadays. If your "b.f." sells one of his you can both have one hell of a honeymoon, too. Post on Ebay but do remember to include a private email address in the listing because the ad will be pulled from the site as soon as some prissy, stuck-up, interfering busybody with nothing better to do complains.

Answer 10

i got married in a registry office +it was perfect .Just me and my husband and a few close friends +family .Why fork out a load of cash and put yourself in debt for other people to have a day out ,cos basically thats what your doing .A marraige is about two people, you can still look fab on the day ,then splash out on the honeymoon ,whatever you decide to do i hope you'll both be very happy ,good luck !!!