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What would one do with a very determined and sometimes defiant little three year old who knows HOW to use the potty and does everynight after his bathtime but refuses to use the potty during the day? I have explained to him that we will go back to doing whatever we are doing (playing play-do or cars, etc...) nothing works and ends up in a battle and I dont want to do that! I am desperate, please help any advice will be better than nothing.

(As far as rewards go, he just tears up stickers and i was thinking of giving him a matchbox car evertime he uses the potty but when do you stop that and will the behavior only be done expecting a prize and when there are no more prizes will we go back to diapers???!!) ugh.

2006-07-06 20:45:02 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting Toddler & Preschooler

7 answers

A young child being potty trained will not tell you that they need to go; don't ask them, TELL them it's time to go- you are in charge. If they fight you because they want to play or go out, tell him "Potty first, then play (or whatever the desired activity is) and stick to it. Eventually, your child will not resist because he'll learn it's quicker to go and get it over with, and soon after that, you'll find he'll start going on his own. Each child is different in the amount of time it takes to potty train, so be patient, and don't punish if they dont go or if they have an accident; it will come in time. Punishment, yelling will only cause the child stress and they will regress in their training. I have had children with developmental delays potty train in three days and others potty train in 2 years (talk about being patient!!). But the difference in the kids that learned quickly is that the parents CONSISTENTLY followed the advice even thought it was a lot of work. The parents that didn't follow through at home had to buy diapers a lot longer. As a teacher, I insist on everyone involved with the child working together as a team so the child doesn't get confused or regress, and so they can progress and have success with potty training. Good luck.

2006-07-11 20:54:08 · answer #1 · answered by cindy1323 6 · 1 0

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It sounds like he's using this as a way of being in control. If there's anything a young child is 100% in charge of, it's using the potty, or not. I would make it a non-issue. If he pees or poops himself, just change him without a comment for awhile. Show him it doesn't bother you the least little bit. However, if he does sit on the potty and lets out a dribble or something, then it's a fantastically big deal. Have a special treat he can *only* have after he uses the potty. Be REALLY impressed when he does use it. It may seem weird to you, but let him in the bathroom with you when you go pee, so he sees an example to follow. It just seems like he may be feeling pushed a bit, and generally children like what you have described will go the other way when they feel pushed. My own son knew exactly what a potty was for and when he was supposed to use it, but he simply wouldn't until he was about three and a half. One day he just decided that that was it, and poof, he was using it all the time. From what you've said, he seems extremely intelligent, and it's not uncommon for children who excel in some areas to lag in others. The key with the sort of boy your brother is, is to really amp up the positve reinforcement, and not to push the potty at all. Casually ask before you leave the house or whatever, and if he says he has to go, then take him to the bathroom, but don't push. If no, then shrug and let it go. Boys generally don't train until 3 1/2 anyhow.

2016-04-12 23:06:32 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

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Any advice for Potty Training a difficult three year old boy?
What would one do with a very determined and sometimes defiant little three year old who knows HOW to use the potty and does everynight after his bathtime but refuses to use the potty during the day? I have explained to him that we will go back to doing whatever we are doing (playing play-do or...

2015-08-19 04:07:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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2016-04-22 04:31:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Tell him big boys don't use diapers. And that other kids will not play with him 'cause he doesn't know how to use the bathroom. That worked with my niece.
I'm potty trainning my 23 month old son and what i do is that I read to him a bunch of books about potty trainning. he loves those stories and since they have drawings of elmo, big bear, barney,. etc. etc. he wants to do the same thing. He even sings about it. It's hard to do but you have to be constant and do not lose your temper.

2006-07-06 22:27:44 · answer #5 · answered by g_g_ta 3 · 1 0

You could keep a potty next to where he is playing.

Or read the book "Toilet Training in 24 Hours."

Part of this stubborness is just his age and you can help him by introducing toileting as part of his routine as is, "before you play with your cars, you have to sit on the toilet."

Then, ensure the cars don't come out until he goes.

Before or after daily routine activities, introduce the toilet and then stop the progression until he goes.

It will be a major fight for three to five days. After that, you'll both get used to it. I hope! good luck.

2006-07-06 20:53:20 · answer #6 · answered by baggyk 3 · 0 0

Keep encouraging him to use the potty, but if he doesn't want to, try not to push him. Be patient. Trying to use force or discipline never works, so try not to get in a battle about it. He'll come around in his own time. My experience has taught me that the best reward is praise. My kids love hearing how proud I am that they used the potty like a big kid!

2006-07-07 09:46:57 · answer #7 · answered by Tiffany M 1 · 0 0

take the car hi is playing with him, give him some Candy or you can give a car every time. do not give him the candy o the car if hi don't sit or try to use the potty if hi sit or try to use the potty give him the reward and tell him he did a great job and you will see that he would love to go back over and over again. and before you now it hi will be using the potty. be patient.

2006-07-07 01:56:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Ok when my boys were potty training they did the same thing.
So i got to thinking about something that might make going potty more fun. Cheerios was my answer. I put cheerios in the toilet and told them to sink the cheerios. They thought it was so fun. They quit fighting me on it.

2006-07-06 21:00:44 · answer #9 · answered by j_elam22 2 · 0 0

what u can do is u can bring a toy doll with potty n show him in the day that how many times doll is going potty. when he is playing u keep his potty seat there n show him there only so that may be he is attracted to it n start using it.

2006-07-06 21:45:49 · answer #10 · answered by Illusive One 4 · 0 0

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