My ex and i went out for about 1 yr and still saw eachother on the side for about 5 more months.then i moved and i had his baby shes 2 months now and it seems like he doesnt care. and its been about 1 yr since i've seen him and i'm still not over him. he was my first love. how can i get over him. i tryed everything and it seems like nothing helps. i'm so depressed. and he calls once in a great while and said i wanna be with and be a family and he said how he still loves and so on. then like a week later its all different he dont feel that way anymore and stoped calling i dont know what going on. so i decided just to try to get over him but dont know how. please help!!!!
2006-07-06 16:54:26 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A six pack of beer should do it.
2006-07-06 16:57:22 · answer #1 · answered by Grandpa Shark 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's not being very mature or kind to you by saying he loves you then acting like he doesn't. I don't believe he loves you because he's not showing real love for you. You deserve a man who will put your needs and your baby's needs before his own. That's real love. If he was your first relationship, it's natural to feel like you never love again, but believe me you will. You'll always have a tie to this guy through your child, but give other guys a chance to steal your heart from him. At this moment he doesn't deserve it. Maybe when he sees you move on he'll be inspired to be a real man and treat you right, but don't count on it. Avoid talking to him if you can, except for important discussions about the baby.. Don't talk to him about your feelings for him or let him talk about his supposed feelings for you. That can only make the pain last longer. Distance and time away from him will help you move on. Lean on your close friends and family to get you through. You need them more than ever now with the breakup and especially with the baby.
You should go for counseling also. Maybe bring someone with you for support and to judge whether the counselor's a good one. You may have postpartum depression. Wikipedia says, "Postpartum depression (also postnatal depression) is a form of major depression which can affect women and less frequently men after childbirth. It is widely considered to be treatable." It's quite common for women to have some moodiness after having a baby, but you sound like you may actually have depression. It's nothing to be ashamed of, but it's something that needs to be taken care of. Don't be afraid to ask for help. New mothers need help from friends, family, and professionals, especiallly if the father isn't there for them and the baby.
I don't have any children yet, but I have some experience with them. I have been depressed before, and I've thought I'd never find a guy to really love me. Now I know that's not true. I've had a few boyfriends and dated some guys casually. There are some great guys out there and you and I deserve to be loved. And you will be if you know how special you are. Don't settle for poor treatment. Maybe you should ask people you trust to set you up with guys who will treat you like the wonderful lady you are.
Feel free to contact me if you want to talk.
2006-07-09 07:28:10 · answer #2 · answered by Ashana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in order for you to move on, you must set things straite with him. First tell him that if hes not serious about getting back with you, to stop saying that he wants to. Hes just playing with your heart and thats gotta stop. he knows it gets to you, because its plainly written on your face.
Whenever you talk to this guy, jsut act like your life is wonderful. Like your walking on clouds. Then sort of hint that you seeing someone. you've got to let him think you've moved on even if you haven't. You've got to show him that you aren't under his thumb any more and your not gonna fall for his petty games. Trust me. It works! Good luck, girl. I know you can do it! Your a woman. and that alone makes you powerful.
2006-07-07 00:05:12 · answer #3 · answered by alyssabeth2304 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its almost impossible to get over ur ex, especially for girls.But u can obviously try to avoid him,thts upto u like dont cal him, keep urself busy wid other stuff.I hope tht helps.Good luck.God bless.
2006-07-07 00:06:58 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
when he calls hang up don't make it that easy for him if you have to act like your with someone that will get his attention
2006-07-06 23:59:04 · answer #5 · answered by puceekat@sbcglobal.net 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋