Who would win in a street fight - Jesus or Superman?

Question

Who and why, not REPORTED and I LOVE JESUS YOU ASSWIPE please

Just a thought - Superman is immune to ALL but kryptonite, Jesus can either be a super pimp or just a regular guy depending on your religion, and Jesus is all peaceful or something right? Or is he immortal?

Answer 1

Superman, of course. Jesus superpowers aren't big enough to make him win against superman : walking on water, turning water to wine...HA!
PS : Dear poecile, even I do know superman is a DC comics character
PPS : Da hammer_head is right : goku would kick both jesus and superman's a§§es

Answer 2

Jesus is a pacifist. Superman won't fight people unless necessary. If Jesus is a "good guy," and isn't doing anything wrong, then Superman would have no need to fight him. Unless Superman is the anti-Christ and it is the time of the Apocalypse, then Jesus would not fight Superman. This would be a draw in that there would be no winner or loser, but only because neither fought. It might even degenerate into philosophical discussion. However, I think I'll entertain this "celebrity death match" pairing. The Christian holy text says Jesus is the son of G-d, and also shows that he is mortal. He was tortured and killed by people using ordinary tools, nothing special. Going off of popular lore, Superman is not human. He cannot be harmed by conventional means. Unless Jesus has kryptonite fists, he's out of luck. Superman is faster, stronger, and more durable. Although, once Superman kills Jesus, he'll come back and then be a deity incarnate. At this point Superman would be out of luck since as a deity, Jesus is immortal.

Answer 3

It depends.

Is Superman really pizzed like when Lois Lane died in Superman 1, or did Jesus pimp-slap his 'hoe or something? I would say Superman b/c Jesus would be all calm and contemplative then BOOM! blood and teeth everywhere!

Or is it the Jesus who just got back from trashing the money changers at the temple? He would probably be so mad, we would crucify Superman on a kriptonite cross, with kriptonite nails.

I think Jesus would probably sooth Superman and both would be crying on each other's shoulder in about 10 minutes anyway. You better watch the link.

Answer 4

for this street fight to take place we would have to accept to false things
1. Superman Exists
2. Jesus would fight

OK after assuming these two things. Think on this. Jesus Created the Creator of superman (the comic) so don't you think that if they were to get into a street fight that Jesus would have just not let the man create superman?

Answer 5

It depends upon which fictional book you like best. The Bible or Marvel Comics. Personally, I'd bet on Superman because Jesus was supposed to be a pacifist. Makes you wonder why all those American war mongers love Jesus so much?

Answer 6

To complicate issues unnecessarily, i have been round because the 1970s so i have talked to people and skim books. an excellent style of the first histories of comics had an excellent style of unreliable assistance -- mutually with Steranko's heritage of Comics which become absolutely nicely-meaning yet which become to three quantity compromised by using his status of an insider and the favor to thrill an excellent style of people. inspite of the actuality that, i'm positive that Superman become inspired by using Philip Wylie's novel Gladiator, as maximum of those old histories say. because the Wikipedia says, on the full of the e book, the (anti-)hero Edmond finally provides up attempting to run his existence and asks for Divine practise. in simple terms about on the on the spot he's struck useless by using lightning. To the quantity that Superman departs from that heirarchy or scenario, i'm not keen to settle for the sequence as Superman. absolutely the memories are a lot less cynical than Wylie's, yet the position Wylie expressed serious values -- Superman is extra acceptable even as it follows it.

Answer 7

Assuming that in some alternate reality they both exist, neither would win. Jesus would be in an insane asylum, and Superman would have been captured by the government so they could reverse engineer his super powers.

Answer 8

Jesus. Faith is stronger than anything else in the world, much less violence which Superman uses to combat his opponents. But then again why would Jesus fight Superman? They both aspire to overcome evil in the world.

Answer 9

u probably r bragging that u play football and u think ur good cuz prbly ur whole team is fullof wimps and i dont know bout the secondary from ur skool but i live in texas and here its all bout the fball and dont be hatin cuz i am smart i read and play fball ur prbly a dumb lazy @ss and isnt san fran known for their gay population sanfran and football please look at the 49iners stop omg iams do ******* offended ur just saying the same s h i t over n over theres prbly alot of hot girls in san fran but there prbly all single cuz evry1 is gay over there so shut the f u c k up ur prbly gay to u dickless p u s s y go suck on ur coaches c o c k that prbly what u do before evry game dumb@ss the only thinf u prbly lift is the razor u use to shave that p u s s y between ur legs neways i was told not 2 argue withe girls or homos or fags or d ick less peole i got 99problems but a ***** aint 1 so keep on doin wat u do best suking c o c k s dat is

Answer 10

I dont think they would fight. Jesus and Superman are both really righteous people, weather fictional or not, and I'm sure they could work things out in a civil manner.

Answer 11

Superman, because Jesus said to turn the other cheek.