I just broke up with this guy right. I liked him for about a minute but then it got old. I knew for a while that I didn't want to be with him, and during that period of time I grew to hate him. He was just so obnoxious. Like I really can't stand him. Well, like a typical highschool teenage situation, there was this huge scandelous drama that unfolded last night and I ended up having to call him to talk to him about something, and three way my best friend into it. I got off the phone because he just wouldn't shut up. Like he rambles SOOO much about nothing important. Well I had to talk to my best friend so I called her back and she was still on the phone with him, and so she said she'd call me back when she got off. Well I talked to him today and he said they were on the phone till FOUR THIRTY in the morning! Plus they're hanging out today? I mean, I really can't stand the guy. He's a great guy, but I hate him. Is she violating some girl code of ethics? Or am I just paranoid? ugh.
2006-07-06 14:45:49 · 16 answers · asked by kgoldfish8 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
u'r friend is definately breaking the girl code of ethics cause even if u liked him for half a second or not that automatically means he's off limits to any of your friends unless otherwise specified by you.
2006-07-06 14:50:50 · answer #1 · answered by hazel_eyez 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Tell me you're kidding, right? Does your girlfriend know how you feel about this guy? Because if she knows you hate him, then no, she did not violate any code of ethics.
But you, on the other hand, are.
Why can't you just be straight with this guy and tell him that while you think he's a really great guy, that he is not the one for you?
By the way, which is it? Do you hate him or is he a great guy?
2006-07-06 15:00:10 · answer #2 · answered by bakequery 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmm, why did you talk to him today? Are you sure you really hate him? If you did break it off with him, he is fair game for anyone; however, if this is your best friend that is interested in being with him, the better thing for her to do would have been the one to tell you. I wouldn't call it breaking the girl code of ethics but one would usually wait before jumping into a relationship with a best friend's ex. You can voice your opinion but if she is your true friend, and you REALLY can't stand him, you will just back her up in her decision.
2006-07-06 14:52:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you will learn that bonds form when you involve others in your business. frankly, yes it sucks that now if they get involved even on the friendship tip you have to deal with him in your life on some level, but you started it. you put your best friend in an awkward position. she had to confront him during said 3way call and if she doesn't feel the same way you do about him than that's just that. she obviously had a different take on him and by involving her you allowed her to have a place in the relationship.
my advice to you is to tell her how you feel about him and that you don't really want to have anything to do with him and to leave it at that. you may find that with time after they are friends for a while you are over your feelings of disgust for this guy and you all can be friends again and it will be all good. the way to be the bigger person is to not sweat it.
2006-07-06 15:02:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't think so.
You said he'll talk until the cow's come home so she probably was mostly just listening. Besides, if you don't like him, I doubt you have any problem with them dating other than you will have to occasionally listen to him go on and on about something you're not insterested in.
Look at it this way, if they do end up hanging out or dating SHE'LL be the one who has to listen to him constantly. You'll be able to wander in and out of their conversations as you please since you'll have no commitment to him.
My advice is to just hang back and see what happens. If your friend does start hanging out with the guy and dating him and wants to talk about him constantly, just tell her that, "No offense, I'm sure you two are happy, but I broke up with him because we just don't have anything in common." If she doesn't take the hint, then you'll just have to tell her more in a more straight forward manner. But not putting the cart before the horse here, like I said before just hang back for awhile and see what happens.
2006-07-06 14:55:10 · answer #5 · answered by this_isridiculous 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't like him, where's the problem? If the guy is a jerk, and you are worried that your friend might end up being hurt by him, then the only code that would be broken would be if you didn't warn her at all. Otherwise, like I said, if he's obnoxious and you can't stand him, let her have him!
Good luck!
2006-07-06 14:48:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My Best Friend knew I went through a lot of stuff that was not good and that my daughters had to endure also. I was married for 20 years to this so called man. She went through all of it with me. She was married and separated twice...I was there for her. When her husband passed I helped her deal with it....whatever way she needed...financial and emotional. I helped her plan the funeral. Her husband hated mine with a passion. Now all of a sudden when I couldn't pay for stuff for her our friendship of 23 years is on the downhill slide because she has chosen to be with him. She still has her husband on her fb and still goes to the grief sites but is living with my ex. I think that is totally wrong. She lied about it for at least a month. What do you all think?
2016-09-09 09:41:06 · answer #7 · answered by dawn 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ohh highschool drama!!! Good luck with that! Yeah, shes violating the young girls code, but don't you want to be above that? If you didn't want him, why do you care who he's with now? My ex husband is getting ready to marry one of my friends and I couldn't be happier for them! He's a good guy, he just wasn't good with me and for his sake, I'm glad he's found someone who makes him happy! It kinda makes our party scene a little awkward, but we all work through it! Don't let your ego get the best of you, if you really didn't want him, wish them well and look for someone who does work for you! You'll be mature beyond your years!
Think of it this way, if every guy that all of your friends ever liked for half a minute dissappeared off the planet that would leave you with very few options, wouldn't it?
2006-07-06 14:52:28 · answer #8 · answered by Mel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey chicky. Hmm, weird situation. I mean, think about it...who cares if she is talking to him, even dating him. You don't have any feelings for him, and hopefully you didn't sleep with him, so let your friend talk to him; if she really likes him, then that's her business. Now, it would be different if this guy and you dated, and he hurt you really badly (like cheating). THEN, the girl code states that your girlfriends CANNOT speak to him, and must be bitchy to him, they gotta stand behind you. But in this case, you liked him for a day, then hated him. Let your friend get the "scraps;" she looks bad, not you. :-)
2006-07-06 14:52:53 · answer #9 · answered by Cristina C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is why I thank God for adulthood! One question: Is this really going to matter 6 months down the road? 1 year down the road? Answer: Probably not. Let it go. You are just stressing out and wasting your time.
2006-07-07 06:36:46 · answer #10 · answered by onefootnaked 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that your just paranoid, i mean u don't even like this guy, u just said u hated him so what's the big deal about your friend hanging out with him, just because you cant stand him doesn't mean your friend has to hate him too.
2006-07-06 14:53:16 · answer #11 · answered by christina j 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋