Do you think it's setting a bad example for teen children for theire mom to not wear a bra?

Question

I'm 34 and quit wearing a bra while pregnant with my daughter(my 1st child;now 15)because what I had got too tight to keep wearing and have never gone back to wearing a bra.I now also have a 13-year-old son.My daughter has never worn a bra-the subject has never come up between us.One lady I know said I was setting a bad example by not wearing a bra,and I should have my teen daughter wearing a bra also

Answer 1

You kinda have to look at the culture in which we live. I'm sure women in South America, or elsewhere have no problem not wearing bras. But this is the USA, and our culture is different.

If you don't want to wear a bra, then that is a conscious decision for you to make. But do take into consideration your teenage girl is growing and developing, and all her friends are going to be wearing bras. She will be poking out, sagging, and showing nipple. It will be quite a social scarlet-letter for her to be a bra-less floppy boob girl in Jr.High. She is going to start getting the attention of boys, and by being bra-less....it will be negative attention.
Educate her, show her what bra's are, what they are used for, how they look shapely under clothing, and tell her that most women do wear them out in society. Once she is educated, then she can make her own choice about it. That way when people chastise her for being bra-less, she will know it was her decision.

Answer 2

I'm 17, and I think it's really horribly trashy when I see other women in public going without a bra. I nag my mum who's 53 when she tries to "go free" in public.

Your daughter should be wearing a bra. Definitely. Gravity will take it's toll on her faster than you think. If you don't want to wear one to set an example, then don't, but at least introduce her to bras. Get her to try on a couple different ones at the mall, buy some different styles that fit, and see if she likes any of them.

That's what my mum did for me. She had me in training bras when I was 13, and I hated them. I'd pluck them off and throw them on the floor. We finally found a style that was comfortable and fit perfectly, and she hasn't had any more complaints about me running around in public letting them flop all over the place.

Answer 3

I don't understand why it should be. If you don't need the bra for functional reasons, then there's absolutely no reason for you to wear it (or to force your daughter to). But then again, I share this view on clothes in general, so my answer is probably an outlier.

There are apparently some men (I had the misfortune of running into one of them a couple of months ago) who think that a girl/woman who does not wear a bra is by definition promiscuous (of course, he used a certain word starting with "sl," ending with "ut," and having just one letter in between). Of course I, rabid feminist that I am, jumped in in her defense. I found it particularly bizarre that he had larger breasts than she did and didn't feel that there was any reason he should constrain his inside an uncomfortable contraption.

Basically, if anyone says anything to you about it, ask them why. If they can't rationally explain themselves, there's no reason on earth you should listen to them.

Answer 4

This is a personal opinion but I don't think it's a big deal for you not to wear a bra. I hate bras but I wear one b/c I'm not comfortable going braless infront of neighbors and certain other people. I also don't feel comfy braless around my daughters friends. However, if you're okay with it than go with that. I do however think you're daughter should wear one. At this age isn't important for support and perkiness????? Also, at her age she is prob. intrested in boys and the are definately intrested in her breasts...I think a bra is very imporant for young women. Not having her wear one will sorta make 'all eyes go to her' b/c I'm sure the other girls are wearing one. Kids are mean at this age and I wouldn't encourage her to not wear one b/c she'll become a target for gossip. I don't know, I'm rambling!

Answer 5

Think about this: Were you born wearing a bra? The answer.. no. If you choose not to wear a bra you are simple doing what you were born to. You dont have to wear a bra if you don't want to, and its not setting a bad example.

Answer 6

Personally, I think you should wear a bra and you should teach your daughter to wear one as well. For one, its just not pretty and two, your daughter is going to regret it when she gets older and looks in the mirror at how saggy her breasts are! If anything, at least let her know that wearing one is an option and take her shopping for one! She should be given the choice and told the consequences if she doesn't wear one....

Answer 7

I guess it depends on your cup size, your comfortability and your willingness to let everyone see you bouncing about and how cold you are.

Now, if you're wearing skimpy crop tops and tank tops with huge arm holes that everyone can see everything, then you should be wearing a bra, or a different top.

I'm sure lots of men love seeing you sans bra - and your daughter too. Of course, they're probably thinking that you're less than respectable, but if you're fine with that, go for it.

Answer 8

no, i think it is setting a bad example to even consider that not wearing a bra may be bad. WTF? where did we get the notion that we should hide or be ashamed of our bodies? oh, that's right, in church. the story of adam and eve. if you are religious, then all i'll say is: good luck sorting all that out, because it is a god-awful mess, biology and religion. if you are not religious, then just take a quick look at what some other cultures do and look at it from the perspective of the average culture before making any judgments. i think your answer will surprise you.

Answer 9

It's not setting a bad example because she's old enough to make her own decisions. What it is, though, is disgusting. No one wants to see you flopping around like a fish out of water. That's gross. Put on a bra.

Answer 10

Wow, that question got a lot of action. I don't usually think you have to do things just because it's the norm. However, this time I think you need to cave in to the social norm. It's like saying that you don't have to wear your false teeth because it feels better without them, but to everyone else it's kind of gross. Now, no teeth and bra-less, that's a mental picture!