2006-07-06 07:31:11 · 13 answers · asked by jlynna10 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My personal experience from being in an abusive relationship, even time apart does not change the ex. Abusers will only find someone else to victimize again and again. Abusers can be very charming and get you to believe they have changed, but in reality you are only going to become a victim of the abuse again. My advice is to move on. Although you may feel affection for this person still it is better to start all over with someone you don't have to change or worry about if there will be "a next time" with the abuse.
One book that really helped me move on and realize why I chose the relationships I had been is "Don't Call That Man!" by Rhonda Findling. It is small and easy to read, workbook like format and also has a part where it shows you how to find the person that is right for you.
2006-07-06 08:14:24 · answer #1 · answered by Wonderfulhaven 3 · 5⤊ 1⤋
Just because they're without you doesn't mean someone else hasn't been the object of their "attention". Very few people change their abusive patterns and those that do live with their urges on a daily basis. Best advice, stay as far away from an abusive person as possible.. now and always.
2006-07-06 07:37:18 · answer #2 · answered by cgspitfire 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most people are going to tell you NO...but.....my best freinds husband used to abuse her really bad.....we have been best friends for 31 years now...and have been through everything together......I tried to get her to leave...she wouldn't so all I could do was be there for her when she needed me. They had 2 kids..and right after the second was born...I came in to the middle of a really bad fight...he started hitting her...I got in the middle...he stopped...after I left he told her he never wanted to see me in his house again...she told him...."she was here long before you..and she will be here long after".....year after year he hit her....dislocated her jaw..she lied for him to the doctors.....then one day.....she made him mad and knew it was coming...she was really scared.....he looked at her....and put his hand down and walked out....after a few hours..he came back...she figured he came back to really give it to her this time..that maybe he went and had a few drinks...but..he apoligized...and promised he would never hit her again....he said...before...he never really paid attention to the fear....instead he fed off it...but this time...he saw it...and he didnt want his kids to ever get that same look in their eyes.....those kids are now 17 and 18....and its been 16 years since he's touched her out of anger....so
my point is.....it is possible..and they can change....but I believe he is the exception.....good luck...and be strong and proud of who you are...and never let anyone take that from you
2006-07-06 07:43:45 · answer #3 · answered by lisa46151 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
USUALLY A LEOPARD DOESN'T CHANGE IT'S SPOTS. AND AN ABUSER DOESN'T JUST MAGICALY CHANGE. TAKES TONS OF COUNCILING AND THERAPY.
IF HE IS TELLING YOU HE HAS CHANGED, RUN! RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN UNTIL HE CAN PROVE IT MORE THAN JUST ONE TIME. DONT TAKE HIM BACK UNTIL IT IS A SURE THING, AND THEN BE VERY CAUTIOUS. THERE IS NEVER A GOOD REASON FOR A WOMAN TO BE ABUSED.
2006-07-06 07:56:04 · answer #4 · answered by BOOMBOOMBILLY 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no never. No one ever deserves to be abused. Stay away.
2006-07-06 07:33:46 · answer #5 · answered by Big Dog 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They sometimes do, but not without therapy, anger management, and a sincere desire to change.
2006-07-06 07:36:50 · answer #6 · answered by Otis F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
RUN, RUN girl RUN. don't be stupid. don't u wanna live.? don't u wanna be happy? dont u want to be treated better. on what planet do u live??? if u have kids have mersy on them...give them better life. u have no right not to if you can.
come to your senses
2006-07-06 07:40:02 · answer #7 · answered by tinker 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope. A toad is a toad.
2006-07-06 07:33:54 · answer #8 · answered by U. N. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you didn't watch tyra today huh?
no
2006-07-06 07:34:11 · answer #9 · answered by u12fme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, nada, nyet, non, in other words no.
2006-07-06 07:35:27 · answer #10 · answered by Gary S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋