My bf has an inferiority complex that he's not good looking, when compared to me. So he often forbids me to talk to good looking friends. I've tried to reason out with him, but he just wont listen. sometimes he confesses that he's behaving so just becoz of his complex and sometimes he doesnt accept. I've always complemented him when he looks good as he looks good in my eyes. But that doesnt seem enuf for him. I think he expects others to compliment him as well as they do for me. He's also worried that my parents will say "he's not good looking as u" or "u will not be make a good pair"when i introduce him to them. dono what to do...I've tried my best to help him with this... doesnt seem to be working. help!!!!!
2006-07-06 04:27:39 · 18 answers · asked by Crazyme 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I don't know if there is anything you can to say to this guy to make him think otherwise. Try telling him that u wouldn't be w/ him if you weren't attracted to him end of story. He might be the type that always needs compliments ie only child, or parental problems growing up. sounds like trouble. I would get out if he doesnt knock it off. Lay the cards on the table. Good luck
2006-07-06 04:37:53 · answer #1 · answered by Goblue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well until he matures and accepts the fact that in your case your looking deeper in him then just the physical aspect he will have this complex. Tell him if he is so afraid of all this why is he with you. He obviously thinks he is good enough for you or he wouldn't be with you. Tell him to be a man and don't sweat the small stuff. What matters is what you and him have together
2006-07-06 04:31:22 · answer #2 · answered by dmxdragon2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guys is high matience. Someone that needs constant ego stroking can be exhuasting. I hate to tell you but it will never get better actually it will probably get worse (I dated a guy just like this) His insecurity will turn to untrust of you. This will just lead to pain and arguments and you always feeling like your not helping him. I know it's hard but girl you deserve someone that is secure and confident he is making excuses for his crappy behaviour....and in my personal experience w/these type of guys (my girlfiends have dated these downers too) Is that often turn aggressive and abusive....they act out on the frustration of not being good enough...or the fear that you are doing something behind their back. Break up now better to pull the band-aid off fast then try and "help" him for a few more months.
2006-07-06 04:33:24 · answer #3 · answered by MaryJaneD 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might sound just a little goofy, but you might consider a boyfriend that is a bit more sane! His confidence problems are not yours to fix. Anything you do to help "FIX" his problem will be more fuel for the fire. This is an increasing downward spiral in a relationship. Soon you will be doing everything to cater to HIS problems and there goes your life and feelings out the window. It will be HIS friends, his feelings, and you will be just running around trying to "FIX" what doesn't make him happy.Good Luck!
2006-07-06 04:35:16 · answer #4 · answered by GRUMPY1LUVS2EAT 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell you parents if they say all that stuff not to be in front of him cause he sensitive about his looks and to tell him that "he is one handsome man" or "that he is such a gentleman". Set up some complements. You should break it down for him "if you were so ugly I would have told you but baby you look fine and I love you just the way you are. You need to stop critizing yourself."
2006-07-06 04:34:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's got some serious self esteem issues that are going to affect your relationship, in a manner that seems controlling (forbids you to talk to good looking friends?). He needs to get over those before he's going to be able to have a normally functioning relationship.
2006-07-06 04:30:33 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to deal with it, or you'll find a guy that doesnt have that problem. If he has an inferiority complex he will adapt out of fear that his is in fact inferior and will loose you.
2006-07-06 04:32:24 · answer #7 · answered by Reverand Ray 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's trying to control you. He may have a bad complex, but more than anything he thinks that he can keep you to talking from better looking people because of his complex.....he's an asshole
2006-07-06 04:30:20 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You aren't going to be able to help him. He's got to want to change and help himself. Give him a self esteem book and tell him to read it, or he might even need some counseling to get to the root of his problem. This is hard to break, so you may want to think about if you want to be with him for the long haul or not.
2006-07-06 04:32:28 · answer #9 · answered by Astro 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many women think they can change a man, that they can fix the little things that are wrong with him, such as his personality.
It isn't true; my heartfelt advice to you is to back away from this problem child and find a guy who's fun to be with. You CAN'T fix this guy, sweetie, he's broken...and it's NOT your fault, and it's NOT up to you to try.
2006-07-06 04:32:55 · answer #10 · answered by silvercomet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋