In m y opinion people are fake in the beginning of a relationship so how can u make that person's real personality shine through early so you dont waste your time?
2006-07-06 03:53:48 · 22 answers · asked by caron c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
By being "real" yourself. By asking real questions and not just those questions that will sound like a job interview. Honest communication! Be honest about being nervous. Your date is probably nervous too. Then, both of you, discuss how best to make each other not nervous. You'd be surprised how funny those conversations can be.
If you are dating with a purpose---dating to find a wife or husband--you are, hopefully, dating like-minded people. People who frequent your favorite places, people who discuss the types of books you like to read, people who hold the same moral and faith values that you have, etc.
In these instances, dating in "non-intimidating" places is always the best foot forward. Say you're first date is made for an afternoon---not an evening date for the first date. Afternoon dates can be at the zoo, the park, a picnic, a carnival, rowing a boat in the lake, something where you can both be at ease in " comfy" clothes and shoes, not having any guidelines on hair, makeup, suits, ties, etc. When people have to "put on the evening masks," they sometimes stay in those "roles."
I would make an evening dinner date only after you've had several other types of "comfy" dates. Then you can already have discussed family, some likes, dislikes, habits, quirks, etc. You already know what makes them laugh---or NOT laugh---and you can be a bit more at ease.
Dating is daunting! Absolutely. A few dating ideas that I enjoyed when my husband and I were dating are:
Our first date was going fishing. We both talked about how much we liked to camp and fish on the telephone prior to our going out.
Second date was paddle boat rides on Jordan Lake. In between our 2nd and third date, we ate lunch together at a park on our lunch hours. Our office buildings were down the street from each other.
Third date was him coming to church witih me, meeting my "church family", then Sunday brunch at a wonderful omelet place!
Our fourth date was an evening date---The State Fair!!!!! We got so messy with food. We both learned that the only reason we like the fair is because we can eat the whole time we're walking! Corn on the cob, the sausage/green peppers/onions, funnel cakes-----When is the fair???
We talked about so many things and go to know each other way before we had to do the "make-up/dress-up/suit and tie thing for a nice evening dinner date. By that time, we knew each other pretty well and we could even laugh about being so uncomfortable in our "evening" clothes!
Those are just suggestions. Good luck!
2006-07-06 04:12:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's no sure-fire way. Everybody wants to look their best when they first meet someone (whether in a dating situation or otherwise). The best bet is to be real yourself and allow the other person to be comfortable enough to start lowering the walls. It's also a good idea for you to not try to read into things what you want to see and to take things for what they are. This whole scenario is why it's often foolish for people to rush into committed relationships early in the dating process. You really don't know who you're getting.
2006-07-06 04:00:13 · answer #2 · answered by BigRichGuy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a person who began dating again after a divorce and was looking for the REAL thing, I have to say that the best way to find out who you are dating is to be 100% YOURself. If you don't want them to hold back, then you need to show them who YOU really are - then if they are someone who can handle your personality, you will know it by their responses...and by the same token, if they CAN'T handle you or are just not a match for you, you will know THAT right away as well.
Don't hide who you are...
2006-07-06 04:01:09 · answer #3 · answered by binaboo07 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't make anyone do anything. People do what suits their situation. If I'm a junkie I don't want you to know that right off the bat because I may not get a chance to rob you. If I'm a drunk you may not decide to see me again because I may be violent. If I'm a liar you may not give me a chance to feed you false information, I need to know I'm good at this. If I'm a whore/womanizer, why in the world would I want you to know that right off, I would miss my chance to add another notch to my belt.
People are selfish and usually have ulterior motives and you can't bring that out, they have to want it to be seen. Just go into relationships with your eyes wide open and be prepared for the let downs...
2006-07-06 03:58:42 · answer #4 · answered by Dancer3d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
http://www.jordansneakersshop.us
Cedar River: Located on Saddler, Cedar River has wonderful fried seafood at reasonable prices. There's nothing fancy about this place, but it's clean and offers good service. Their fried shrimp, fried oysters, and hush puppies are golden brown and never greasy. Sometimes they have an all you can eat grouper special for a ridiculously low price. Just check the sign by the road they'll announce the special there.
2014-09-28 21:20:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure... I know that I put up a wall of defenses so I don't get hurt. I know my husband didn't really get to know me very well until we'd been together for about a year.
People come into dating with baggage, and sometimes that baggage keeps them from letting down their guard. (Or they're kinda creepy and act fake so they'll get a boyfriend/girlfriend.)
2006-07-06 03:55:49 · answer #6 · answered by Melissa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't have sex. Don't even kiss for a while, because you can get caught up and it can lead to sex.
By keeping the physical relationship out of it, you spend more time talking and you figure out much more quickly if this is someone you want to be with. Plus, by the time you actually have sex, it'll be amazing because you will have built up to it.
2006-07-06 03:58:46 · answer #7 · answered by lizwatson109 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Buy one of those "dating games" in the store and see what answers he gives to the question: It won't take long before the REAL DEAL show up!
2006-07-06 03:56:53 · answer #8 · answered by sweet ivy lyn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Push the limits and cross the lines to test them. Be with them around their friends and observe them in different situations. No one can maintain a different personality when situations arise that would dictate their natural response. Analyzing their natural responses could lead you to who they actually are.
I believe a key is their job. How dedicated or not are they to their job. How successful or not are they. How much time do they spend working. From this you can find dedication, integrity, striving for self-improvement or betterment of self, and direction.
2006-07-06 03:59:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
By looking past your "new relationship infatuation" and paying attention to them. It's there and it's not that they hide it all that well. The biggest problem is people are so caught up in the new love that they overlook whats really right there in front of them.
2006-07-06 03:56:45 · answer #10 · answered by ~Gate~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋