2006-07-06 03:39:22 · 6 answers · asked by caron c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Relationships begin in what we call 'romantic' mode and eventually transfor minto 'realistic' mode. This often happens after a year or so (often less). In the 'romantic' stage people see each other as the ideal individual who will meet their most basic emotional, sexual, etc. needs. Each party puts forth his/her best in fulfilling this ideal.
You have transitioned to the 'realistic' stage when you realize (consciously or otherwise) that the other person is not going to meet your needs, but is in for themselves. At this point you begin to show your true nature replete with flaws. During this stage the parties either learn the basic truth of relationship which is: each must take responsibility for meeting their own needs AND their job as a partner is to help facilitate the others journey to wholeness ( a mutually fulfilling relationship) OR you begin to 1. relate thru conflict or 2. divide up roles and resign yourself to a relationship of convenience. Either will ultimately destroy the couples's intimacy sexual or owtherwise.
True love is the realization that no one except yourself can heal your family of origin traumas (we all have them). However, in a successful relation a couple can help the each other heal thru mutual support and assistance.
In a working relationship there are no putdowns, open and genuine communication, regular gifting and emotional/intellectual/social support.
I recommend 'Getting the Love You Want' by Harvelle Hendrix as the best book on the subject bar none.
Good luck! A loving relationship is possible! Millions of us have them and none of us is any different than you!
2006-07-06 08:29:45 · answer #1 · answered by ahuhyeah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does not take 365 days... you can provoke the real person to appear much sooner, say 2-7 days at most.
2006-07-06 03:43:05 · answer #2 · answered by ••Mott•• 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely. It happens every time. Sometimes it doesn't matter, but other times it can harm the relationship.
2006-07-06 03:42:58 · answer #3 · answered by KittyluvR 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep, you start to see what someone is really like after the "honeymoon"period is over.
2006-07-06 03:44:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes.
2006-07-06 03:44:05 · answer #5 · answered by Niceguy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah, once a monkey, always a monkey.
2006-07-06 03:47:33 · answer #6 · answered by pOOhPhAT 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋