My boyfriend and I have a 1 yr old daughter. I just found a hotel receipt in his pocket ( I obviously was not in attendance to the hotel when he went, I was out of town). I have always suspected him of cheating, but now it is confirmed and I know it is over and I plan on moving out by the end of the month (he doesn't know I found the receipt yet). How do I accept that our child will not have us both there now. I think I was just hanging around for her. He is the best father (just a lousy boyfriend). I am crushed. I think I may be more embarassed than hurt. What do I do?
2006-07-06 03:20:43 · 15 answers · asked by Diamonds_4Ever 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I appreciate everyone who is responding. For those who said to make sure about the receipt, he was in a hotel a few minutes away from our house so there is nothing that he can say. I was out of town so I guess he just didn't want to bring the girl to our house.
2006-07-06 04:28:29 · update #1
funny you asked, I just left my boyfriend of a long time and let me tell you first honey, time heals all wounds.Truly. Also, let me tell you feelings are just feelings,you'll develop new ones for someone more worthy your soul cannot be replaced. WOuld you be able to accept yourself knowing that you let someone misuse your love?Exactly. He will always be the father of your child and you have no reason to think that would change,you have to do what is best for your soul,your daughter will not even remember you two beig together like that and in time she will admire you for it.
2006-07-06 03:27:59 · answer #1 · answered by riki_muz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes its better to leave than stay. No child will benifit from you being there without wanting to or having you both fighting etc. Sometimes its better for the child to be seperated when two paretns cant get along. All though as you said hes a GREAT father dont stop him from seeing his child because there are not very many good fathers out there. The beef is between you and him and the child has nothing to do with it so dont put him in the middle. I know moving on can be hard but if you arent making it together all parties involved will benefit int he long run.
2006-07-06 03:27:27 · answer #2 · answered by budlghtbabe76 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to get over the embarrassment. This happens to more people than you'd think. As for your child, you have to put her best interests first. Both of you do. When you leave, sit him down and let him know that yes, you guys have your problems and you will not take him back, but your daughter is the most important thing in the world to you as you know she is to him too, and you want to establish some groundrules for raising her and both being active participants in her life. Always remember not to bad mouth each other in front of your child either. That never solves anything and will just make her feel horrible and unloved. Life goes on after cheating and hopefully as you go forward, you'll be more cautious before you start up anything so serious. Good luck to you...you're going to be fine. You'll see!
2006-07-06 03:26:37 · answer #3 · answered by SuperJenn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not preaching here, but there seems to be a "new' parenting system today and it's sad that girls get a baby before a marriage. It just complicates your life and messes up the babies mind one who is the parent and you are without a legal stand. Tell your bf you found the receipt and what your plans are. Maybe come counseling would help you both. In the meantime, don't have anymore children. God Bless.
2006-07-06 03:24:07 · answer #4 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are doing all the right things. She is still so young, that she won't remember the two of you together, so it won't be so hard on her as it is with older children. You are doing yourself and her a favor by leaving. Staying in a bad relationship for the kids never works, and kids are smart, they pick up on the tension between parents. So stay strong, move out and start a good life for you and your daughter. Good luck! (you don't need that jerk)
2006-07-06 03:25:26 · answer #5 · answered by Astro 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi there, i just want to say that its a precious thing that you two have, love. you have a lovely child and that is enough to bind you bi\oth togather. first of all speak with him directly, you could be wrong. then decide what you want to do. he might not have done anything. if he is really guilty then i would suggest you move on but not without a discussion with him and a last try. its the question of your child, as it is very difficult for a child to loose a parent. take care. may god be with you. smiles: angelfish. :)
2006-07-06 03:30:46 · answer #6 · answered by angelfish 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First speak to a family lawyer to make sure that you get support for your child. Make sure you keep a copy of the evidence. Make sure that you save some money for the expenses that you will have when you move out and then move out. It is hard when their is a child but you have to do what you need to do to be happy.
2006-07-06 03:26:26 · answer #7 · answered by wingedgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I"m going through the same deal;.. It's going to be hard, I mean really hard.. but you have to think what's best for your 1 yr old... Right now it's all about your daughter, should be first priority... As far as your boyfriend goes, just leave him...
2006-07-06 03:27:16 · answer #8 · answered by crazgrss 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
youre a good person. most of the decisions you make about your child will be the best available, judging by the fact you stayed for her. Leave his weak *** and threaten not to let him see her. Use the receipt to fuel your fire.
2006-07-06 03:25:01 · answer #9 · answered by fakejhentros 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well first of all you should tell your daughter something and then tell your so called boyfriend that you found the hotel reciept and then walk out the door. you will find someone better than that jerk that will treat you and your daughter with love and respect that both of you two should get.
2006-07-06 03:24:44 · answer #10 · answered by shar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋