what do i do if my fiance wants to attend a ob/gyn appointment with me?

Question

we had a huge argument regarding my effexor prescription. I made the mistake of consuming a little too much alcohol which I assumed made me alittle veggie the next day and he jumped all over me about taking the prescription. now he wants to question my dr. calling him a chemists. (fiance thinks popping pills is not the solution)... mind you this is the same man I am having a very hard time living with because he has prescribed predtisone for crohns. I can remind my dr. about patient confidentiality and tell my fiance that I am feeling great with the effexor but I am questioning the bottom line here... is this another emotional reaction of my fiance due to the steriods? he is being a pain in the butt.

my appointment is today and I asked him if he was attending it and he said no. It is too late to cancel the appointment and my fiance is going to want to know about the appointment conversation. I have read several of the answers below and although his money has nothing to do with his behavior he already had certain characteristics the predtisone was not enhancing such as no intimacy (sex) for long periods (1 time out of 5-6 months) and totally anal about how I act or have taken care of my family (was low income-living paycheck to paycheck)... anyway I am not with him for his money I am living day by day. He says all relationships have work... i am not being lazy but damn I dont want to leave him because he is anal and has an intenstinal decease. geez.

Answer 1

He wants to control your meds? Bin him. Trust me love and Trash him before it is too late. BIG RED 'ABUSE IN THE FUTURE' FLAG. Please rethink the marriage thing. If you have crohnes, I do, and I know it is horrifically painful. Will you be allowed to take the meds? The effexor is for the depression of the pain I assume? Will this man be supportive if you have complications? What if you perforate? Will he take you for surgery? Will you be allowed the 6 to 8 weeks in bed to recover? I am totally freaking out. I have been where you are. He almost let me die. I crawled to the phone, called an ambulance and he wouldn't let them in! I was dying on the floor because he said that the chemicals were unnecessary. Security threw him out of the hospital for interfering with what the doc said I had to do. I left him while I was still in the hospital. It started because we had an argument over my anti depressants.
I wish you the best of luck, many blessings and much love and strength.

Please don't drink on your meds, it might kill you. Alcohol aggravates crohnes, ask for xanax, it works better and doesn't screw with the crohnes.

Answer 2

Sounds like your fiance has control issues. Was he like this before he was prescribed the steroids? I, too, am on and off of steroids for a spider bite and also a bad, bad back and when I am on them I am a moody, b*tchy mess. Tell him he can come with you but he has to wait in the waiting room. He is violating your privacy, or at least trying to, anyway. Tell him that the alcohol and effexor deal was a one time thing and you learned your lesson. You may have had a hangover even without the effexor. Alcohol causes that. Does he know that? I think he is just being a pain in the butt and a bit too controlling. He is gonna ruin a good patient/doctor relationship for you if he goes with you and starts questioning your doc's methods. Plus, your doctor may be very mad if he finds out about you mixing the alcohol and the effexor. Your fiance needs to back off and give you the benefit of the doubt that you are intelligent enough to learn from your mistakes. Do not let him talk to your doctor. Once you establish a good relationship with a physician don't let anything ruin that. Good luck.

Answer 3

Its a possibility that he is simply just over reacting due to do steroids however did it ever accord to you that he might just be concern for health and will being? Why would you be drinking alcohol while taking medication any way you wouldn't be having this conversation if you would have taking the medication as directed by the doctor. If anyone here is at fault it is you, not the doctor. That's what you can tell you love one there is no need to see you doctor.

Honestly I don't see the big deal this is only the man that you plan to spend the rest of you life with.

Answer 4

I don't think that you've really identified a problem here. I just see a man who is concerned with your health. You made a mistake about consuming alcohol with your meds, you got sick, and now your fiance wants to talk to you doc about alternative options to meds. Maybe he knows that you like to drink and wants you to be both healthy and be able enjoy a social time with friends. My fiance always wants to come with me to my gyno appointments because he knows how important the support is to me. Perhaps your man is having issues with his own meds and knows it and doesn't want the same thing to happen to you. Maybe if you don't want his love and support you should leave him.

Answer 5

Sweeetie, drop him like a hot potato. Sounds like a Tom Cruise freak without the money and looks and fame (I'm assuming). You deserve better for your life and for your future children. Doesn't he have aything to keep him busy? Like his own career? He's not a man, he's a ninny and a nanny.

Answer 6

if ur having such a hard time w/ ur fiancee, why are u getting married to him??
that's the more important question

Answer 7

Tell him you don't want him there, and that you don't need him questioning your doctor. Sounds like a control freak to me.

Answer 8

Is this the man you want to marry?

Answer 9

maybe you should let him go with you and with that, the doctor could explain to him better than what he thinks is right.