depressed lost and confused?

Question

my bf of 2yrs and i broke up this past thurs.im not so sure he wants it to be this way...his parents are just forbidding us to talk to eachother.i have not been able to eat since thurs morn when it all went down.last night i had about 4 spoons of mac n cheese and a couple bites of steak-basically because my friend forced me to.he is having suicidal thoughts and says he cant stand waking up/walking around/not being with me/etc.i love him dearly and havent been able to leave my apt but about 5 times.i feel like we are both going crazy now.(he snuck over to my apt yesterday because he 'missed me' and couldnt let his parents know)he was slumped over my balcony and didnt care to fall off and would have had i not pulled him back onto the concrete.i feel as lost and hopeless as he does.what in the world can i do about this?should i try to resolve it with him and ask him to move in with me to get away from his parents?do i stay depressed and let him go?im so confused and lost.he is my life...

to answer a couple peoples questions-we are both 20 and yes, i could see marriage and a family. it was a heavily talked about issue between us...

Answer 1

If he is 18+ then he should forget what his parents want. It is his life to live not theirs. Although as long as he lives in their home he must abide by their rules. However that should not include who he is with outside the home. He needs to get some backbone and stand up for himself.

If he is not 18+, he is stuck with their rules until he reaches the age of 18. Then he can stand up or leave.

Terry

Answer 2

you can't say screw his parents because they are important in his life too. Have they told you both why they don't want you two together? Why don't you go to their house and sit down and have an adult to adult talk with them. No fighting and if they start yelling and cussing or something weird like that, tell them you do not want to hear that and when they are ready to have a more mature talk to let you know. Otherwise if your boyfriend is 18 then you guys can do what you like, but it would be nice to somehow at least TRY to make amends with his parents.

Answer 3

That you both are having suicidal thoughts is serious. I'm somewhat confused about your situation though. It sounds as if you are both adults living apart from your parents though they seem to be able to forbid your relationship. Whatever the case, it sounds as if both of you need a therapist. Please go to your nearest hospital or mental health clinic and tell them the symptoms you have described here. Both of you need to address your individual issues. If there is a possibility of restoring your relationship, you might want to do some couples counseling as well. This is a very serious issue and you need to address it right away.

Answer 4

If you two are right for each other you will get back together.If his parents are not letting him see you then your going to have to wait until he's of age.hang in there and wait.If it right things will work out. But move him in.If he talking about killing him self then he's not ready.If his and your love is true it will still be there when hes of age.I jumped into a marriage when I was 19 and he was18,his mother try ed to stop it by telling me he wasn't ready.I hated her for that,But now I know she was right.After we got married he had so much freedom that he trued into someone I didn't like.We are no longer married after three years of hell and a son. So what I try to tell you is is you love and his are right it will last until he's of age. True love always comes back.

Answer 5

talk to your parents about the situation
pray to Jesus
if you are old enough see if your parents will help out.

Most of all remember that the two of you won't always be children and when you turn 18 youall can do whatever you want without them having any say.

Don't make any rash decisions. If he loves you maybe you can email each other for the time being until you turn 18. His parents are probably looking out for his best interests in their eyes. If possible, go talk to them and help them understand that you just seek to date, not kidnap him from them forever.

Answer 6

Take into consideration the reasons why so many people don't want you two to be together...maybe it was an unhealthy relationship and the people around you are just trying to help you before it gets too crazy and be honest with yourself....can you see marriage and a family with this guy......you may be young.I don't know but even if you are if you can't picture that then its not worth it.

Answer 7

Don't let your parents tell you who to love, that's just wrong. I could see if there was something they really didn't like about the relationship, but I doubt they could give you a straight answer as to why. If you are both feeling so drained by not being together it's important for your health and happiness that you stay together! Find him girl! Go for it

Answer 8

If you and he are both adults then his parent's shoudn't tell him not to see you. If he wants you and you want him, what's wrong with it? If he has a paying job have him move in with you or get his own place and don't let his parent's dictate his relationships. It's one of the oldest stories in the book, but the bottom line is that you both love each other and should be together. Don't let them stop you from happiness.

Answer 9

as alone as you may seem unfortunately this is the typical withdrawls felt by being separated from something (someone) you are used to having. Minus the ex pushing his drama on you. You have your own psychological and emotional growning pains you have to sort through with out him being there.
I would completely advise against you allowing him to move in. He needs to resolve this issue with his parents. If you allow him to move in your only giving him a way out----versus giving him a solution. Not only that but I'm sure it (the relationship) feels like a fairy tale but if you allow him to "train" you into fixing his problems for him he's not going to learn how to fix them himself. Then when you need him to be a man he won't be able to handle the pressure. You obviously have a good sense of self responsibility don't deny him that experience. If he no longer wants to follow mom and dad's rules and no longer benefit from their support then "he" needs to go out on his own===not find someone else for him to lean on.

Answer 10

I would consider first, what his parents have a problem with as far as you 2 being together. Maybe a sit down with you , him & his parents would help.
If not,if you're both over 18,you're adults and you can live wherever and with whomever you wish. I wish the best for you both.