how would you feel in this situation?

Question

i took my girlfriend out to dinner with my 2 couisins, there wife, her sister, and he friend. my girlfriend doesnt know any of them personally.
the 3 girls were wispering about my gf , she told me after dinner she was crying
she said she doesnt want to be around them ever again
this happened 3 months ago , and she still sticks by what she said
she wont even go to bbq because she doesnt want to be humiliated again.
i didnt know they were talking about her" they were making fun of her breast" there big
what should i do to help her

im 24 my girl is 19

Answer 1

Sounds like she got treated very rudely and I do not blame her for not wanting to see them anymore. I am shocked that you have not told your cousins and all that you are very ashamed of how they acted.

Answer 2

You don't state how old you are, so it's a little difficult to answer this question. However, feeling humiliated when you are young is very difficult to get over. An older person may also feel humiliated, but generally doesn't really care as much what people think.

I wouldn't go to the bbq out of respect to your gf, THIS TIME only. Call your family and explain that you will not be attending because your cousins were rude. Tell them you will be sure to see everyone at the next family gathering.

Your gf will appreciate the gesture. However, she MUST and I stress MUST attend the next family gathering. Hold her hand walk in together and be sure to be as nice as possible. Do no let the "mean girls" get in the way of your relationship with her or her relationship with your family

Answer 3

I do hope that you apologized to her for your family's behavior. No one deserves to be treated in such a childish way. And why again is it so important that you added she was 19 and you are 24? Do you think the age difference between you two makes her perception of things less relevant, because she is younger than you? Do you think being 19 makes her too sensitive? You didn't know they were talking about her and therefore it didn't really happen? Do you think she is too young for you...what exactly do you want to hear? Let me tell you something. If you didn't call the three girls or confronted them about what happened three months ago, yet...then you don't deserve this girl. You did not make her feel that what she witnessed really happened...by not doing anything about it. Have those women apologize to her...you should be able to achieve this at 24...right?

Answer 4

Since they are YOUR family, you need to approach them and put them in their place and stick up for your girlfriend. They do not need to be talking about her like that when they know they are being hurtful because she can hear them. They are immature and rude! You need to take care of the problem so that your girlfriend will be okay around them again. After you talk to them, explain what you said to your girlfriend so she knows what is going on, but be prepared because she may still want to stay away from them. Good luck!

Answer 5

First of all, you should stick up for your woman! If she does agree to go with you again and anything like this happens, a well placed remark can go far. You can make a joke out of it if they are whispering, "Anything you would like to share with the rest of the class?" and if that doesn't work you need to talk to your cousins and tell them what their rude behavior has done to your girlfriend. There is no reason that she should have to put up with that, especially if she was hanging out with YOUR friends and they treated her like that. You need to stick up for her and at least she will feel like you are on her side and won't let her feel all alone and made fun of. Good luck to you and seriously, do what you know is right! Be there for your woman!

Answer 6

If they can't show some respect, she doesn't need to be around them and why would you want her to be? They don't sound like the kind of people to waste time with. I understand that they're family and there are times where you're all going to have to be together. Until then, I would avoid socializing with them and might even tell them why.

Answer 7

Wow, thats horrible.
I'd feel totaly humiliated, and I stick by her one hundred and ten percent.
Tell the three girls what they did wasn't right, and if they ever ask why they don't see your girlfriend anymore, tell them they are to thank, because of what they did.
That is so discusting and totaly uncalled for, thats horrible.
Nobody deserves to be treated like that.

Answer 8

I would tell the 3 jealous girls that they owe your girlfriend an apology! I would tell them that until they can make things right with her that you will not be attending any family functions that they attend. How rude of them! Let your girlfriend know that she comes first and that you respect her wishes to avoid them.

Answer 9

If they were talking about her, they are obviously jealous for her. Why else would they talk about her? I would definitely talk to the women and let them know it's not cool. Then I would introduce her to other family members to make her feel better about herself. If you think she could be the one she will have to come in contact with your cousins and their wives again. Having some of your other family on her side will help to deal with those nasty heifers!!

Answer 10

Stand by her decision. She shouldn't be forced to be in a situation where she is talked about and humiliated especially by people she doesn't know. Talk to your relatives and explain why she is upset, maybe they didn't mean to hurt her and they will apologize. If not, they're not very nice people to be around, are they?

Answer 11

Talk to the family member that were making fun of her. They should approach her in a friendly way to make her feel part of a family. Hope this helps.