My daughter was molested my her father's brother. Now he is sueing me for keeping the kids from him. HELP

Question

I do have CPS involved but since she is only four they are saying there case is too weak. I have not let my children go to his house because they live together. He is also saying that I am making it up. But she told a doctor in the ER what happened. I got sick and had to leave the room so she didnt see. We are going to mediation on the 25 but he wants 50/50 how can I stop it. Can some please help us

Answer 1

I'm really glad you are going to mediation to try to work this out. But it does sound like a complicated case so it won't be easy.
One option is supervised visits (tho the costs can add up fast with those). If her father lives w/ his (SICK!) brother then he needs to move out and find his own place so he can see his kids. I know CPS can be really slow sometimes in how they handle these things and if she is only 4 it is hard to build a case to have him thrown in jail (where he should be).
If mediation doesn't work out (don't sign anything unless you are really sure you are okay w/ the agreement, don't let him pressure you into anything) then you need to go back to court to have a custody hearing and at least try to get full custody, do this right away because if you are violating your custody agreement he can sue you even if you are right about the molestation. You can bring in any witnesses from the ER and if you have character witnesses (he can have those too tho) to the custody hearing. Make sure the judge hears what you think is happening (even though there is no proof he may go w/ supervised visits at least temporarily).
Keep on CPS. The more you call and the more questions you ask them the better. Ask the same question to as many different people as possible. Call supervisors and department heads, anyone you can get ahold of to listen to your concerns.
Try and enlist the help of ER staff where you took your daughter. They may have ideas for your local area and may have seen similar things before.
If he does get continued custody in any form hire a Private Investigator to get proof of anything that you think may be happening still.
And be SURE to talk to your daughter. She will need help dealing with this. Also, be sure she knows who is allowed to touch her and where they are allowed to touch her. Make sure she knows a word for penis and what it is so she can tell you if he does anything inappropriate. But try not to scare her.
Good Luck!

Answer 2

Get a good lawyer, but also get a legal guardian for your daughter. She will need someone who represents HER. Legal Guardians are attorneys who represent the child in court. It helps to eliminate one lawyer accusing the other parent's lawyer of being corrupt and partial to their own client. Your daughter needs someone who isn't fighting for you or for the father but strictly for your child. Also, make sure she gets some sort of counseling. Sometimes kids will tell a counselor something that they are too afraid to tell their mommy or daddy.

Since the uncle was the offender, I'm assuming that the only reason you don't want your daughter to go to the house is because this uncle lives there. Tell your ex and the judge that same thing and that the issue isn't about the father seeing his daughter. He can see her at your house or at another house where she will be safe and supervised and away from the uncle. He is not doing your daughter any justice by taking his brothers side. He should be committed to that little girl first and foremost. Maybe he will see his brother for what he really is if you get the ER doctor to testify and perhaps any other counselors who speak with your daughter.

Good Luck.

Answer 3

Well since she is four and told the doctor she can tell the judge what happen too but make sure that u are in the room with her and not her father when she tell her story. Also she should have been checked out by that doctor so get the paper work for that. But if there is a must to see them then ask for supervise visitation were some one is all ways be present. Oh yea also when shes telling her story make sure that she feels comfortable about it first.

Answer 4

I was molasted by my father and by an uncle. Fight it girl. Do not let your daughter see him. If the Doctor knows about it get him involved in this court case. It is wrong and the uncle needs to get punished. No matter the age, the kids are always right in something like this. I was younger than that and still remember things and the judge will believe u and the child. I have a younger half sister as well that was 3 at the time when we found out what happened. It is wrong and they have to pay for what they did. Please keep me updated. E-mail. I will also pray that things go right.

Answer 5

you are totally in the right. He should not be near the kids, because what would happen if ur husband was somewhere and u were somewhere else and the kids were left with him? If he has confessed to molesting his own daughter, he should be probably in jail or something! I think that u are totally right and u need to take the kids away from him. And i disagree with your husband's fathers wife. she should have left him after he did that, but its not my choice to decide any of this, im just trying to help (:: Also, u need to know that what he did was a crime and criminals are in jail. if their not in jail, u should have no contact with them so ur safe. I wish you the best with your family and hope this info helps. Oh, and merry christmas :)

Answer 6

Get the best lawyer money can buy. Talk to CPS, the lawyer and anyone else you can think of as to what you can do to keep this man away from your daughter (supervised visitation?). If you have to work 2 jobs to pay for the lawyer, isn't it worth it? Do you have parents or other family members who can help you? This little girl is depending on you for her safety and her very life. Don't let her down. Good luck and God bless you both.

Answer 7

As hard as it seems at the moment, just stick it out, and as best you can, try to find all the proof you can that it actually did happen. And do NOT, under ANY circumstances allow your children to go back with him, no matter WHAT he threatens you with...CPS will jump on that in a split second. I know you knew that, but...sometimes men like that can be REALLY pushy and...well, other things which I cannot say at the moment, but...just stick to your guns babe. I'm here if you need more support.

Answer 8

Get your daughter to a child psychologist ASAP. You will need people outside the family to corroborate what you are saying. In the meantime use whatever means necessary to delay the mediation. You need time to build a case.

Answer 9

This has happened to me except i have four and my husband's parents ended up with mine after it was said and done. My suggestion is to hold on to the faith, get a good lawyer (or at least make the one you have see where the problem really lies) Im not sure why your husband is not seeing things the way they are but if you need to talk to someone you can contact me at [e-mail]

Answer 10

Get a lawyer immediatley. You should take this to court, you need to make it known that you aren't keeping the kids from their dad - you are keeping them from their uncle.
Try to talk to your husband about it and let him know he is free to spend time with the kids whenever - just not when they are with the uncle. He of all people should understand whats going on and he should want to protect his daughter from being hurt. The fact that he isn't as out raged as you are is a bit weird.