My brother is violent. Im 12 and he is 14. He grabbed my neck and pushed me into the wall and wanted to choke me but he let go. Then he smacked me and scraped my forehead. He dug his nails into my arm and now I have purple marks on me. This isn't I lie I swear. Please tell me what can I do. Some people think i'd die by 18.
2006-07-04 08:26:37 · 73 answers · asked by Cecilia 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Im afraid my mom will think its a cry for attention. My dad is in jail (Isn't that nice? no.) and I wouldn't trust my moms BF with my lunch money.my mom had bad nech pain so she is mostly in bed. Once I told her I wasn't feeling myself that I felt sad. She said to go write about it and not to say things like that. it really upset me. My brother is somtimes nice but its like he is a whole other person when he is angry.
2006-07-04 08:39:38 · update #1
Sounds like Your Brother is living some of what He has possibly witnessed in His lifetime. I had the same problem with My Brother. My Dad was abusive, so when My Brother got older, and something made Him angry, He took it out on Me. You have to make Your Mom listen to You. Sit down and tell Her that Your Brother has been physically hurting You. Tell Her that You are afraid that the level of hurting You may increase into something that would be better stopped now. Remind Her that She is Your Mother, and She is supposed to protect You from harm, but do it nicely. If She will not listen one on one, then write Your feelings down, and give them to Her to read. If neither of those two attempts brings a solution, then You are going to have to get help from an outside source. Which trust Me isn't always an instant cure. Here is a number for Abuse and Family Violence Service1-800-799-SAFE. Child Abuse Hot Line 1-800-252-5400. National Youth Crisis Hot Line - 1-800-448-4663. Just remember that You do not have to give them personal details at first, if You are just trying to get some answers, but chances are they are going to have Caller I D, so You may want to call from a pay phone. Once You start the ball rolling, it will be out of Your hands. But if the situation is evaluated and determined not to be dangerous, then You are back to where You started, except Your Family will be really mad.
Have You tried talking to Your Brother when things are going well, to let Him know how his behavior makes You feel? Do You have Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, or Family Friends that could help you?
If You can get Your Mom to listen, and have a meeting with You and Your Brother, and it is real, that in a perfect world, would be Your best bet. But if that does not work, just remember that there is safety in numbers, so if People know what is going on, it will not be as easy for Your Brother to get away with hurting You, and for Your Mom to act like it is not happening.
My heart is with You, and I will pray for Your safety, and the safe resolution to this matter.
Get a camera and take pictures of the injuries Your Brother has caused to Your body. Have a friend help, it is best to have this documented, and to have a witness. If You are in great fear, right now, go to the home of a Friend, whose Parents You can trust will help You, and do the right thing.
God Bless
2006-07-04 09:16:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
You need help. Your brother needs help. And it sounds like your mother needs help as well. If you don't want to go to the police, and that might seem a drastic move, you can go to Child Welfare, and tell them what you have just told us. This is not something you have to put up with, and if your brother is behaving this way at 14, unless he gets help he's going to be out of control and do someone some serious damage. You don't want him to join your dad in jail, but that's a definite possibility. Likely one of the reasons he is acting out, and behaving so badly, is because of the family situation. It's hard to know what to say about your mom -- are your parents divorced? How does the boyfriend fit into the family? You say you don't trust him. Go with your instincts.
Meanwhile, get some help for yourself, and hopefully, a savvy counselor will see that your whole family needs help. It won't be easy for you to do, but I cannot urge you too strongly, to see the necessity for this, and to act while you still can.
Good luck to you, and stay strong.
2006-07-17 12:18:15 · answer #2 · answered by old lady 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your brother needs help and by you keeping quiet is not helping. Maybe he is violent because your dad is in jail. He has no positive male role model.
There really is no problem you seal your own fate. Wake - up and smell the coffee. You need to open up your mouth cause saying nothing only causes more grief.
Your brother does not have the right to put his hand on you and covering up for him isn't the right thing to do.
If you don't say anything when he gets older he will probably do it to some other womenThe cycle must stop now. You have to be the one to break it.
The reason why so many women die is because they keep quiet.
2006-07-18 09:25:26 · answer #3 · answered by Wahenie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have you told your parents? how about a school counselor? in any other situation if your brother did this to someone else it would be considered assault and is a crime...if your parents do not help then go to your school counselor, if they don't then call the police. if you get help for yourself you will also be getting help for your brother, he's a bully and obviously very angry about something and has chosen you because you are smaller and weaker than him to take his frustration out on...you do not deserve it nor should you endure it. don't worry if the police come out or the counselors have someone talk to him to get him psychological help cause sometimes whats best for all is for some one to step in and put a stop to it. don't feel bad, or guility you are not the problem but you do need help before it does get more violent and it will if you don't stop it now....hang in there, be strong and know that you are worth it, that you should never be beaten by anyone.
2006-07-04 08:33:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your parents and your brother that you're giving them one warning and one warning only. The next time it happens you will be filing a report with the police and pressing charges. That should make them sit up and pay attention-if not then just do it the next time it happens. You would have warned them so it's nothing to feel guilty about. I think you're a child and they should protect you. Or you could try telling a Teacher, a Neighbour, a friend's Mother or an Aunt or other relative.
2006-07-18 12:57:32 · answer #5 · answered by MAK 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In this situation you need to get away or get him away.
It sounds to me like you have a very unhealthy family situation. Neither you nor your brother should be in a home with a parent and boyfriend you can't trust. (In fact some of your brother's aggression could be a response to the situation--a way he can express rebellion.)
If I were you I would first look for other family members--aunts, uncles or grandparents--who might be able to help. If that fails, police or protective services might be a better answer.
The real villain in this isn't your brother. It's the adults in your life. He's reacting to a situation he doesn't like. You're available and you're weaker, and that makes it worse for you. Get out of the situation however you best can.
Good luck and God bless you.
2006-07-18 14:50:52 · answer #6 · answered by Warren D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like the adults in your life have given you a reason not to trust them so I suggest you call Children and Youth, or what ever youth service agency there is in your area. If you can't find any talk to the police and they can direct you to one. Chances are this is the most help the police will be able to give you because of it being a domestic (in the home) problem and not criminal (crooks). At least this way if you can get in touch with the agency in your area they might be able to help you get counseling for you and your family.
2006-07-17 01:55:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My brother is the same way....he has even attacked my parents ! He has shoved ,kicked , cursed everyone in the family . He chocked my other two brothers and my dad ! I moved out as soon as I found a place to move into ( after I graduated ) . I was so happy when he moved out at age 16 . Its really tough , but there isn't anything that we can do except stay away from them and be careful what we say and do around them. I had it tons worse than you and I am fine. I had mentally and physically abusive parents AND my crazy brother. What sucks is that when one of my other brothers got older he shoved me twice on the floor when my daughter was standing right there watching ! You will be fine ! Just remember to stay away from him and watch what you say and do around him . I know what you are going through is tough but you will survive. Good luck ! :)
2006-07-16 17:15:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is time to put an end to this. If your mom won't stop it, you need to report it to someone who will. Call your local child protection services , police office,your school counselor, or a family member or friend who will take you seriously. It looks like he will be the next one in jail if he doesn't get some type of anger management counseling.
Hope you get help soon. God Bless.
2006-07-17 16:47:58 · answer #9 · answered by mother of 5 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
domestic violence is what it is...it's a against the law...Tell your counselor at school. contact 911....report this abuse.
You can also contact abuse hotlines in your area and seek out help.
Your brother displays anger because of the living situation that you're both in. Where are your grandparents, family support?????
Tell your mother if things don't change you'll be forced to contact someone that will force the situation to change.
Department of Children and family need a telephone call today....It might be called Childrens Protective Services too. Call them TODAY and get the help you need A.s.a.p.!
2006-07-14 00:26:15 · answer #10 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋