what is the secret to letting go and really being calm?

Answer 1

xanax

Answer 2

Stress is natural. Whenever anything happens, it's a stresser. Not all stressers are bad; stress, even the most miniscule amount, is just what happens to your body when you do something. Even when you take a warm bath, the feel of the warm water is interacting with your body; that interaction is a stress.

Stress is normally thought of as bad word, and for good reason. Most people go through so much of it during the day, and they need to experience something that causes that low stress level (like a warm bath) to allow their high stress levels to disipate.

So, how to stay calm? Well, you can only be calmer. Even if you don't have really high stress levels to worry about, the lack of those high stressers causes you to notice the medium stressers. Take away the medium stressers, and you notice the low stressers. There is no such thing as no stress. Even taking away low stressers makes you notice miniscule stressers; the sound of your breathing; the wind; those tiny interactions that help drain high stress levels. Think about it; when all you do is laze around; you get impatient, antzy; even those miniscule stressers build up.

I think the key is self-control. Teaching yourself to stay calm, or at least appear calm. And teaching yourself to appear calm, believe it or not, will help you feel calm. And as you appear to handle more stress, it feels better to do so, you *are* calmer. Well, at least it works for me. I didn't even notice that it had happened until I started getting compliments on my patience. Then I noticed how impatient some others seemed.

Now, at first, I had to work on physical stress relief; time alone in a bathroom, ranting to friends, talking to family. Since my stress was about my kids, I had to realize that I was so stressed because my kids were acting out; and they were acting out because I wasn't disciplining them consistently. And I was leaving off disciplining them because I should never spank them while I'm angry, which I was doing an awful lot. Vicious cycle? I started using time outs. Time out gave them not only time away from their own stressers, giving them time to calm down, but it did the same thing for me.

You'll just have to experiment, at first. Figure out what works for you in your own situation; what works for me, at home, will not work for you at work.

Answer 3

If you sequester youself in a place that doesn't have things that bombard your senses every millisecond you mind has a chance to get away from the things that bug you. Another way is to find out what you really want...as in make sure you make decisions on problems that are troubling you. Figure out which options is the best for you for each problem to reduce stress and strain so that your mind can stop worrying all the time. Another method might be for you to change your vocation to something that places less stress on your mind.

Answer 4

You have to put everything into perspective. For example, if a stranger has annoyed you with a random comment, just think about what's important to you and how much it matters. This will help you to get your priorities straight. You've also got to think to yourself, "they might be having a rough time at the moment" too. Once you've sorted out in your head what really matters to you, it should be easy enough to let the small things in life that annoy you pass you by!

Answer 5

Meditation has helped me in a big way. I used to have a bad temper and was pretty stressed out about alot of things in my life.

But you have to be serious with it, and don't expect an overnight success. Search the web or read some books on the subject and find the technique that is right for you.

Answer 6

I need to know the answer to this one too - i'm such a stressful person. I tend to get paranoid and usually over-analyse things that people have said and it just confuses things. It's hard to relax and be calm because i am such a thinker and can't help but remember things people have done or said - it is really hard. I'll probably come back to this question to see what answers you have recieved and maybe i can get some good advice myself.

Good luck anyway!

Answer 7

It is just a state of mind . If you can lay hands on a translation of the Bhagwad Gita, which is a hindu book of philosophy you can read the answer yourself. If not just practice by first mentally detaching yourself from the thing you like most. You will realize that absolut happiness lies not in acquiring what you want nbut in not wanting anything.! When you have absolutely no desires you will have eternal bliss!

Answer 8

There is no doubt that letting go of things and not feeling anxiety from them is hard. You have to keep tellling yourself that my worring about it cannot change it. It hard to let go of that control. When you say to yourself" Well I cant do a damn thing to change this Im going to move on" you feel better, I know I do. Try to keep a middle ground..dont give up on everything a go into a depression but try to leave the control up to god, fate, destiny..whatever ideal you follow. You cant be perfect nor have perfection sometimes and its a hard life lesson to adquire...to be humble. GL!

Answer 9

The secret is to let go of what is bothering you by accepting that whatever it is aint worth the head space. ie:sitting up all night worrying or thinking about someone chances are that person is sound asleep,none of us is that important so next time think is it worth the head space.

Answer 10

I find that with any issue that I am worrying about, I apply this theory - tomorrow this issue will matter less, next week this issue will matter hardly any at all and next year I will have totally forgotten about this issue. After all, can anyone remember what they were worrying about last week or last year? This helps me put worries into perspective and remain calm.

Answer 11

Simple.Inhale with good thoughts and exhale with the bad thoughts floating away.Oh and 1 more thing smile.not a smirk but a smile of gratitude cos you're burning karma.