What do you do when your child confesses to having sex at 15?

Answer 1

First of all don't start yelling and carrying on. It's done, now is the time to deal with it on a mature level. First I would take her to the doctor for a checkup, then since she apparantly is going to have sex no matter what, have the doctor put her on birth control if is is a female. You can also have a mother daughter/son talk and explain the consequences of sex at this age and how it could alter their future if something were to happen or they had a child at such an early age. just be as calm as you can, it happened, it's over with and there is nothing that will change it. IF you over-react, this child may never confess to you again. Maybe they told you because they are looking for options. Good luck

Answer 2

The first thing you need to do is listen without judgement. By telling that to you your kid has already shown a lot of trust in you which is a great start, and you don't want to damage that. They probably have a lot of questions and maybe worries about what happened. Answer honestly as possible and offer to help find out answers to anything you don't know.

You should discuss your values about sex, just remember to do it in a caring and supportive way. Depending on the circumstances, offer to set-up a doctor's appointment to test for STDs and to get birthcontrol. While I'm sure you don't want to encourage sex at that age, unfortunately 16 is the average age people begin having sex and if he/she is going to do it anyway (despite reinforcing your values and why you feel that way) I'm sure you'd rather your child at least be safe.

Answer 3

The worst thing you can do is fly off the handle and go crazy. It's a fact of life, has been for millenia. Remember when you were 15? Any differences?
If you have been doing your job, and instructed your child properly, then they know to be responsible with such huge privilege as becoming a part of the breeding pool. If you haven't done your job properly, then Happy Grandparents Day!

Answer 4

Make sure they know the real facts about sex - the good and the bad. If child is female, get her on birth control. If male, give him condoms and explain the importance of using them. Obviously, they need to understand restraint is the best alternative, but just as obviously they will do it again. Keep talking and cross your fingers. Good luck

Answer 5

Provide them with birth control and condoms. Take them in for a pap smear and STD screening. Teach them everything you know and open the communication lines between the two of you. These days, 15 isn't young to start having sex (unfortunately).

Answer 6

All you can do is listen. Your not saying if the kid is much older now like 20 or 16 and just telling you they had sex. So that could make a diff. BUT either way your child is trusting you with a huge thing...most kids don't talk like that w/their parents so consider yourself lucky, listen and more importantly make sure protection is now being used!!!

Answer 7

Make sure they have appropriate health care and appropriate information.

Planned Parenthood has confidential check ups and testing, as well as educational programs. The education urges young people to strongly consider the advantages of abstinence and other alternatives to intercourse, but also teaches about condoms, birth control, infection, safer sex, how to talk to partners about sexual issues.
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/
A complete check up, including education and birth control is about $50 for girls and $35 for boys.

I know it is hard to send you child to strangers to learn these things, but sometimes it's easier for a teen to accept "the lecture" from a stranger than from a parent. And it's certainly easier to ask questions in a confidential setting.

Answer 8

Be a good listener, make sure your child knows that safe sex is important these days. Don't nag, and try to be more of a friend than a parent, and they will feel safe to come to you later about other things.

Answer 9

Listen. Then teach. If a child is sexually active at 15 they need all the tools you can give them to do it safely. If that means buying them contraceptives, then it will have to be done.

The alternative is a pregnant 15 year old. Which DO YOU think is better?

TFTP

Answer 10

Stay neutral but explain your position.
Don't be judgemental because you need to be thankful that they told you.
You really, really need to go over some info and pictures about STDs that can be caught from unprotected sex (you can also call your local hospital because alot of times they will have seminars fo this.)
Explain protection as well as abstanace, and it wouldn't hurt for her to go get an HIV test because she may lie and say they used protection...safe is better than sorry.