I don't understand why I attract married men. I the guy I'm seeing is married although he says he is not happy and his wife uses him, he continues to stay. I love him and he says he loves me. We started out just as friends for the first 3 yrs. then last yr we became more than friends. I just found out today that our times we see each other may be getting cut down. I love him with all my heart. He even says he loves my kids as if they were his own. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm about ready to give up on men totally. Most men don't want to be with me because I don't have much money, both my kids have behavioral/emotional problems, plus I'm over weight. I guy I'm seeing now says it's not what's on the outside but what's on the inside.
2006-07-04 06:28:49 · 14 answers · asked by blueyedangel71 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i was in the same position before too. Its not fair to you or your kids. you need to leave him and find someone worthy of your love that isn't already taken
2006-07-04 06:33:05 · answer #1 · answered by buttseyeluv43 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey ... steer clear of the married guys. The only thing that will come of that is more heartbreak.
If this man is as much in love with you as he says he is ... then it should be a simple matter of divorcing his wife. If not (and this is my guess), it means he just wants his cake and have it, too.
Married guys who cheat on their wives are not the kind of man you want. If he cheats on her ... he'd cheat on you just as fast ... maybe faster because he's used to it now.
You bring some baggage to a relationship if you have all those things going against you. The biggest problem is that YOU see these things as barriers. That comes through to single men ... along with making you a target for married ones.
The first thing to do is to "make friends with yourself" and accept who and what you are. If you don't like "who and what" ... put some effort into changing that.
You'll come out of the process happier and better able to attract and sustain a relationship with a single man.
As long as you feel "woe is me" ... you'll send out those signals, whether you want to or not. Get a more positive outlook on life and view your problems as challenges to overcome ... not as burdens to bear.
Hang in there, honey!
2006-07-04 06:38:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
So, you think this married man loves you so much. Just what do you think he tells his wife? And why is your time with him being cut down? Girlfriend.....you need to keep from cutting in on a sisters time and have some respect for yourself.
There are plenty of programs to help you with your children. One of the best ways to help your children, is to have some integrity and self-respect.
Stay away from married men...honey, all they want is an extra place to play.
2006-07-04 06:34:21 · answer #3 · answered by rrrevils 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your in a tough situation but you probably know that you should have not entertained this relationship from the beginning. Stay with your husband, dump the user, and just focus on the real father of your children and yours' children. You'll be much happier without the distraction. I think a psychologist can help too.
2006-07-04 06:38:10 · answer #4 · answered by watersprings 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
although there are many grey areas in life, most heavy decisions are black and white. either he loves you or he doesnt. either he wants to live with you or he doesn't. there are no conditions, except the ones which keep him stringing you along while still playing hubby to his wife. your continued persuit of this dangerous game will only bring you misery, sorry. if it begins on shaky ground, it usually crumbles. look for that which is solid, stable, clear in it's path. a man who declares his love for you and acts on it without hesitation is a man who can be counted on. cut the dead weight loose, hun-you're worthy of better than that.
2006-07-04 06:36:32 · answer #5 · answered by grumpy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, learn to love yourself, then love will come. If that man accepts you, he must take the whole package (kids and all). Think about how you would feel if someone else was in an affair with your husband.
2006-07-04 06:34:16 · answer #6 · answered by Big D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's sounds like he really likes you...but i don't understand why he's staying with his wife...my mom went through the same thing...it's a very emotional situation...and that's sweet that he says it's not what's on the outside but what's on the inside...he doesn't sound rude like most men...
best wishes huny
2006-07-04 06:34:43 · answer #7 · answered by lucky-in-love 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u my friend are what they call a home wrecker. u should leave him alone he wants u for sex and nothing more dont think hes gona leave his wife for u because hes not just go and look for a single man or worie about ur kids insted of some maried jerk who likes to cheet on his wife
2006-07-04 06:34:27 · answer #8 · answered by mountianbiker_dude 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To me it sounds as if he is having his cake and eating it. I would leave him and wait for someone who isn't married. Also it sounds as though you have low self esteem, it doesn't matter if you have money or not that's not important. What is important is that you learn to love yourself and realise you deserve much better.
2006-07-04 06:33:20 · answer #9 · answered by Angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, perhaps if you know a guy is married, avoid seeing them even if you attract them.
About your guy, ask him to make a choice... you, or his wife. He can't remain married to this woman, yet see you on the side.
2006-07-04 06:32:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋