My Partners parents were informed of our relationship about 6 months ago now, were buying a house together but my partner doesnt want to tell them because theyt don't except our relationship at all i want the best for my partner but cant help getting frustrated that they wont except there daughters happieness any advise?
2006-07-04 01:53:56 · 27 answers · asked by Rhea C 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
This must be really difficult for her to face...
Sometimes parents get let down in the process of parenting because they typically raise and guide their children with their own beliefs and values.
One those beliefs and values are altered...it's difficult to accept.
But I think before you two create any type of scheme to cover up this important event...you should consider simply being up front and honest...and let her parents decide how they will most comfortably proceed.
If anything...a simple post card with the information they require might be enough...ie
"we're buying a house together...here's our new address.
signed - us"
good luck!
2006-07-04 02:06:18 · answer #1 · answered by Warrior 7 · 9⤊ 3⤋
This is a tough one!!! A parent loves there child no matter what.. there may not be much anyone can do right now except be patient...
all you can do is talk to them, again and again and again and hopefully they will come around..
If they miss treat or disrespect your partner then you might just have to stay away... they will either learn to except your relationship and partner or the relationship between you and your parents will not be the same as before...
Good Luck!!!
2006-07-04 02:04:54 · answer #2 · answered by DeeDee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is difficult for you Im sure. Perhaps you could buy the house, move in and make it all pretty and homely. Then, (with your girlsfriends agreement) invite her parents round for dinner and they will see how settled and happy you are. That way they will know you are in a serious and long-term relationship. Then, its up to them. If they still wont accept it, you just have to make do. Dont make your girl chose between them and you, as that will only cause more problems.
2006-07-04 02:02:14 · answer #3 · answered by Helen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't force them to accept your relationship... and it might not even matter whether she was in a heterosexual or lesbian relationship.. some parents might not like either partner. I'm heterosexual and my parents, especially my mother, has never accepted my wife. You and your partner have to make the decision for yourselves.. it's your life/lives... your relationship.. your investment. You have to do what you feel is right for you. Take them out of the picture... they can not force you to do anything.. they can not force her to do anything. Your partner has to understand that you are the one she has to be happy with and she has to be happy with herself. If you're parents can not accept the person you are, then you have to move on with your life but... you need to do one thing.. explain to them your love for this girl... and what direction you're taking your relationship in. They will either accept it... or not.
2006-07-04 02:01:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The parents aren't the problem here. The problem is in your partner who is still under the great influence of her parents. You'll always have disapproval everywhere you go (unfortunatelly!!!!) in this stupid narrow-minded world. But you don't need approval to be together and buy house. Least from your parents.
2006-07-04 02:17:55 · answer #5 · answered by Psychologist 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
doesn't matter what the parents think as long as you 2 are happy now not telling is wrong because what will she expect that if they come to visit for you to pack up so they don't see you live there or something so before you jump into that big of a relationship you need to tell her she needs to tell them or you won't move in together cause it would be unfair to you
2006-07-04 01:58:28 · answer #6 · answered by OZoNE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
6 mths isn't very long for your partners parents to come to terms with their daughters sexuality. I expect they had been hoping they would see their daughter married with children and had been looking forward to the prospect of being grandparents one day.
How ever as a parent myself I'm sure that if they love their daughter half as much as i love my kids that they would welcome anyone who made their daughter happy.Maybe you should both sit and explain to them how much you love each other and that you want to live together because it seems the natural thing for the two of you.I'm sure given time,once they see how good you are for each other they will accept you as a couple.Good luck with your new home hope you will be very happy.
2006-07-04 02:18:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's very hard to educate people against their will. In some ways you have to accept their being stuck in the past and create new things as we do. Just leave them behind. You really cannot afford to live with influences that seek to divide you both. Set your boundaries. Allow them in your lives on your own terms. Don't let their thoughts affect your status quo.
Love and support to your relationship. x
2006-07-04 02:00:22 · answer #8 · answered by Chubby 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your partners parents and every other person in America is not with it when it comes to the word GAY!
I say do what you want and live for you and her. if we live for everyone else then we have NO LIFE!!!!!!
Did you hear me homophobics? We live for us and no one else!
Soon marriage will be legal and OUR CIVIL RIGHTS will not be violated any longer! YES I DID SAY CIVIL RIGHTS!!!!
We might as well be SLAVES in our own country.
So I will step off my soap box now.
Tell them you are getting a house together and if they accept then great. if not then who cares.
Parents should accept their children and love them despite the choice of sexual preference.
all the best
2006-07-04 02:06:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give them time, they will come round eventually, just be patient. I'm sure they still love you as much as they did before you told them. You are still their child after all !!!!! I think as parents, we have expectations of our children, we all want to see them settled with members of the opposite sex & to produce grandchildren!!! Keep them informed of your plans so they don't feel excluded. When you move in together, invite them round for drinks or dinner. Just let them see you're happy. Hopefully they will come round, but, it's not going to be instantly, they have to overcome their disappointment, that you have chosen a different path to the one they had mapped out for you!!! It doesn't matter how old you are, your parents will still think you are 5years old!!!
2006-07-04 02:17:13 · answer #10 · answered by Mummy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make sure you both understand what happens to the house and the money each of you have put into it in the event that the relationship breaks down.
2006-07-04 02:05:09 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋