Help with my 2 yr. old son.?

Question

I have a 2 year old little creature at home that is a good boy but when he gets mad he does not listen and he screams at me and ignores my voice. I have tried everything from time out to taking away his favorite things, even rewards for his good behavior, I once have spanked him on his butt softly but felt bad because he is still very young and i want him to love his mom but also respect me.

Please some help for this loving, desperate mother.

Answer 1

Dealing with a disobedient kid is difficult, because parents either don't know what method of disclipine to use, or are sqeamish about using them. You are NOT alone! We've all been tehre and only learn by asking, trying, and seeing what works.

If he throws a tantrum, ignore him. This approach is called extinction, and it is based on the premise that a tantrum is a performance for an audience. Cut out the audience, and there will be no reason for a show, so the show (the tantrum) stops.

If he blatantly disobeys you, and then refuses to go to his room, say "You did not listen to me, and now you will punished. You will stay in your room for 2 minutes". Pick him up and put him there. If you have to hold the door closed, do so. After 2 minutes, let him out. Try to keep your cool throughout.

He will learn that he has no choice but to obey or be punished, and that tantrums have no effect.

BTW: After punishment is over, be sure to treat him nicely. Do not hold a grudge or scold him, because that would be like continued punishment. Sit and read him a book, or something else interactive.

Answer 2

There is nothing wrong with spanking a child and u shouldn't feel guilty about it..if u don't teach a child to behave and not to walk all over u..he ain't going to respect u...i was spanked as a child and i have manners and respect my parents..i also know not to mess w/them..i learned early to do what i was supposed to,if i didn't want punished...i would do as i was told....
If its just cause he's throwing a tantrum though that u have to spank him,did it stop his behavior when he got a spanking...i know when we used to cry and carry on..my dad used to say he'd give us a reason to cry if we didn't stop...(we'd get a spanking)if we didn't stop crying for no reason.
but if he throws a tantrum how do u respond..is he doing it for attention..if so let him yell all he wants at least once and see if he keeps doing it if u don't pay any attention to him.If u don't teach him to control his behavior when he's still little imagine how much worse it will be when he's older and bigger then u and still won't listen to what u say.You'll have problem's with him.
You can give a spanking w/out feeling like a bad mom...i can even give u a scripture for this....the bible says raise up a child in the way he should go and he will not depart from it....so teach him now..also i'm sure you've heard this one spare the rod spoil the child.If u love your child,then discipline your child,set rules and boundaries for him...and make sure he knowns theirs consequences for his behavior.It's a really good lesson for him to start learning as early as possible.
also wouldn't spank unless it's extreme situation...like nothing else works!Or if he could have hurt himself or others.

Answer 3

He is just learning how far to push you, that is all, most kids test their limits at the age of 2+.
It is important to stand by your decisions and not to give in, otherwise he will not respect you in the future.
I have the same problem with my daughter she is 4 I have tried everything, I think the important thing is to keep on with what you are doing, and not to give in.
If you do not punish a child for incorrect behavior (don't get me wrong coz some people don't believe in spanking), how do they know when they are doing something wrong.
When they are older they will not be able to tell right from wrong and either get into trouble or get hurt.
I think the positive rewarding for when he is good, is a very good idea, it encourages him to be good to get rewards, instead of being bad to get attention, which allot of children do.

Answer 4

My son did that a few times, and I ignored the outbursts. I would tell him that I cannot hear him when he yells, and if he talked nice I could. He eventually got out of that habit, without much effort. I feel for you, sometimes our kids can test our limits. But don't be afraid to be a parent because he may get mad at you. He will love you more for setting limits and showing your care through listening to him and teaching him right from wrong. That's the BEST and toughest job you could ever do for him. Good luck!

Answer 5

hey lol,hope he'll be better later on
but...I prefere to know both of your star signs..and his order between brthrs&sstrs if..

I think That the matter is due to one or more of the possibilitie
1_either u live lonely with him
2_and/or (U R 2 soft or 2 hard) with him
3_and/or he is ill with certain disease(headach,tootach..)
4_and/or he eats so many chemicals in the candies
and juice,and drinks..etc
,so plz try to do these

1_you have to insist on your position, to do what you say
or...DO NOT say any (order or command )if you ....even think ..that will not insist.or u retire...
2_ If there is any third person ,u've to creat a certain CORONA of respecting for one of you..either the person or you,,to build a stud that stops the kid's influence if necessary..1 of U should transfere some of the stuff to (the respctng corona person):-
4 ex. w'll ask him/her to agree...w'll wait his prsnce,,ask him to agree ,,...if he says ok...in order to make kid feels that there is another authority respectful level..
3_ DO NOT be very hard with him,,will lead him to a dead point and will incite him to go on only one way..the bad 1.
4_ try usually to sign with scourge but don't strike...or that will be the ground of the relation between you,and will not affect any more after some time
5_ try to inform him or make a certain propaganda before you buy anything that he likes,to capture him to you ,but not for too long time
6_use silent in the relation,,instead of shouting,,use the gazing,,but with laughing ...that is bad to him
7_even if he tries to object,,you repeat your caommand and say 4 ex. ( yes u'll do so&so)..and change the whole object to a nice one,4 ex. let's c carttons..or get an apple together...etc
8_give orders in the best time 4 hime i.e when he is glad,full..
9_use the biorythm to rcgnze his curves(phscl,intlctl, emtional ) ,so many on the net...
10_now he is trying to dscvr his limits of freedom...so show him,what is his ,what is not his(yours or others belonging).
Hope to be better soon,love to U both

Answer 6

I prefer prevention to punishment. You said he is only bad when he gets angry. Try to figure out exactly what triggers the behavior and alter the environment to eliminate the triggers. Some kids can't handle too much stimulation at that age. Also diet can play a big part.

Answer 7

Okay i have a thirteen year old son. The one way to keep him in control is to be strict. Always distinguish yourself as the absolute power in his life. Be strict but always tell him that you love him and you want him to learn from his mistakes. Use examples from your own mistakes or tell him stories about when your parents disciplined you. All parents feel bad when disciplining their children because they feel that they are going too far, but that is the way my father taught me and now, all of his advice has helped me in more ways than he can imagine and i admire him above all people...even Batman!!!! In any case don't be afraid to use discipline\ne but only little by little. Then increase your methods little by little as he gets older. Trust me, he will grow into a respectable young man if you take the initiative to mold him.

Answer 8

Hun he will love you more if he is disapline properly. If you felt like a spat on the bottom was right then who is to tell you your wrong. No one person can tell you how to raise or disapline a child every child differs ex. my oldest i had to spank my youngest time out was more than enough. He will respect you as long as you respect yourself.

Do what YOU feel is right for the situation.

Answer 9

Seriously?..

timeout would have been good.. that is if you not specify a time limit, but to 'timeout' until he quites down & am able to 'notice' his environment.

specify a place (or draw out a corner of a room, eg the corner of the living room) when he gets mad & doesn't listen to whatever you say, put (or drag or whatever) him into the corner until he quiets down..

he might be curious the first time you do this & quiet down fast, but do not think you have his attention, as it might not be the case. ignore him for some time until you are sure you have his attention.

when you do, make sure that you talk to him in a firm but kind voice, to make sure that you are not scolding him, but still wants him to obey you. you can ask him if he is done throwing a tantrum and that if he is, talk to him about why he is doing it.

if he is too young and still cannot understand you, you can keep using this method so that he knows that throwing a tantrum is useless.

make sure you ask him why he do it, or if he has been naughty before he throws tantrum, make sure you punish him appropriately while explaining to him why what he did is bad. use the same punishment (it must be something he resents or he might not think it as a punishment) until he stops the action.

once: i was about 6 yrs old. it seems that i've accidentally hit my relative. my dad wanted me to appologise to my relative, but as i thought that i did not hit her (or maybe that i've already appologised, but my dad didn't hear), i refuse to appologise. My dad was so angry that he didn't allow me to eat dinner. i sulked and refuse to relent even when not able to eat dinner. after that, my dad used the cane on me. i still didn't relent as i still thought i didn't do anything wrong. after that, either my sister or mother came to talk to me and told me the reason why my dad wants me to appologise. that was when i found out what he wants to teach me, that even if i didn't do it or that i've already appologised, it is better to appologise again so as to clear the misunderstanding and have no bitter ground. so finally i appologised to my relative.
now, i will automatically appologise whenever i did something / accidentally hit someone, and i more goodnatured than before(i used to be very short tempered and strong headed)

it is important to explain why you want him to do something or why you punish him for something, so that he will act more maturely and not throw tantrums for no reason.

if you relent once he throws tantrums, he will become spoilt and it will be harder for you to teach him when he grows older.

Answer 10

You are getting to know your child and making comparisons agains everybody you have met in your life. He is just getting to know the first person he has ever met. He will not judge, he will only react. Be as firm as you need to be, watch his reactions, and use your experience to decice what to do next. It is a wonderful time growing little monsters. Difficult at times, but remember... You da boss.

"Spare the rod, spoil the child"

from a father