i am having trouble dealing with the loss of my mother?

Question

....i am sometimes melencholy, and i cry alll the time...can someone help me deal without talking to anybody or counselors...p.s. i am an adventist so i believe that my mom is not in heaven, but sleeping until christ comes so dont give me any of that "she is happy in heaven" crap.

Answer 1

Everything you are feeling is completely normal. Pray and ask God for strength and to surround you with his love. Nobody can replace your mom, but it would help to do things with people. Don't isolate yourself....and remember all of the good times you had with her. Believe me, she would never want you to feel sad and miserable. Hold strong to the love you had for each other, and someday you will see her again. God bless.

Answer 2

I wish I had an easy answer for you. I'm non-denominational, but believe as you do. The dead know nothing until judgement day. My father had a stroke in 1976 and passed away in 1992. I was never able to deal with it and still can't. I block it out because the pain is too intense. What I do is keep myself busy physically and mentally. Of course there are times I think of my dad and cry, sometimes until I'm exhausted. Try and keep busy and keep on telling yourself you'll see her again someday. I hope this helps you.

Answer 3

You born then you live and die it life I wish I can bring your mum back but I am God your mum will be very happy if you go on with life she won't want you to cry all the time she will want to you to do things to move on with life she had her life so I am sure she will want you to enjoy your life too come on I know it hurts noone can take that pain away from you just remeber her the good times you have and hold those memory it will get you going.sorr for your mum loss all the best.

Answer 4

I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. I just lost an uncle and a cousin two weeks ago, so my family and I are currently grieving as well. Unfortunately, death is a part of life. Sometime down the line we will all travel that path. I don't know the circumstances of your mom's death but my uncle died of cancer. It was very hard and painful for me to watch him suffer the way he did and I find peace just knowing that he is no longer suffering. I look at death a little bit differently now. Let me share a story with you. Six years ago, I was going through my usual day to day routine when suddenly I began to experience an excruciating pain in my side. This pain came suddenly and without warning. I didn't know what was going on. I didn't know if my appendix had burst or what. All I knew that something was terribly wrong and I had to the hospital right away. I was in far too much pain to drive so I called my parents. After arriving at the hospital they ran a battery of tests. I was in so much pain I was comfortable, sitting, standing or laying down. It was horrible. At that point I didn't care if I had to have surgery or what. As I was laying down in the ER a chaplain sat with me for a second and prayed for me. At that very moment I had made up in my mind that if I had to have surgery that would be fine and if that could not stop the pain then I was ready to die. Fortunately, for me, it only turned out to be a kidney stone and no surgery was required but having experienced that causes me to look at death a little differently, especially when a person is sick or experiencing health problems. I am of the baptist faith so our beliefs are diffent in some ways, however, my advice to you is to turn to your faith. I understand that you want to do it alone but sometimes we have to learn to rely on our family and friends in our hour of need. Don't be afraid to turn to others for help. Although our religions may differ, one thing we do have in common is our belief in God and the power of prayer. I will keep you in my prayers. One more thing. As long as you keep your mother in your mind and in your heart her spirit will live on through you.

Answer 5

Well having already dealt with losing my mother I was prepare to tell you how I dealt with it at the time of her death and how I am still coping with it today. No it didn't have any thing to do with she is happier in heaven. However I really decided that with your attitude you wouldn't understand and at this time are not prepared to hear any ones view point on the subject. So I guess you are on your own to figure what is best for you.

Answer 6

I Lost my mom 26 yrd ago. It is very hard. But time has a way of healing this a bit, you will always miss her and there will be times you will cry. Just give it some time. Hang on to your "happy memories of her. How about writting down your feelings?

Answer 7

There is strength in numbers so talk to other adventists who have experienced loss. I can understand not wanting to talk to a professional but one does not have to have a degree to be a counselor, talk to an empathetic friend or neighbor.

Answer 8

I lost my mom almost 5 years ago and I can tell you that time is the only thing that helps. I know this isn't going to calm the pain you'e going through right now, but I understand - I cried all the time too. I wish the best for you.

Answer 9

I respect your beliefs, but please do not call mine "crap"!! My mother died when I was a year old, 67 years ago, and I really did not know her well, but I have missed her and mourned for her my whole life. I can identify with your pain and am sorry for your loss. Think of the good times you had together and her strengths. Those memories will sustain you more than anything else.

Good luck!!

Answer 10

I am truly sorry for your loss and will not question your choice of religion, the Constitution of the United States guarantees you that. I wish there were a quick fix, but there is not. Eventually you will be emotionally more able to get on with your life, but your mother's memory will never leave you. I honest.y wish you well, and God speed.