I've been with my boyfriend for almost three months now. I am inlove with him. and he's honest enough to tell me that he's not inlove with me... he just loves me. Now, there is a huge difference there. I wanna know if this relationship would still work even if he's not inlove with me. He said that he'd been in many relationships before, he fell inlove, but the relationship didn't last. So now, he's thinking, maybe the relationship would last longer if he doesn't fall inlove with me.. I love him soo much.. and I am soo inlove with him. Do you think our reltionship will still work? please help me out.. im going crazy.
2006-07-01 09:20:14 · 5 answers · asked by Isabel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I honestly don't understand how one can pretend to love someone else, yet not be in love with that person... It seems to me that your boyfriend doesn't want to get emotionally involved in your relationship, which means your entire relationship is based ONLY on the trust you choose to invest in him... But you cannot be in love on his behalf, too... So, a word of warning: you're dancing on VERY THIN ice, over a river of lava... There is a strong possibility of getting one HELL of a burn... There are two things that I don't like in his vocabulary: 1) he says he's not in love with you, but he loves you anyway (that sounds an awful lot like a line you would like to hear); 2) he blames his previous failed relationships for his lack of envolvement... Personally I think this is his M.O. of getting what he wants, no offense... Be very careful, this situation may be dangerous to you...
It would be better to talk to him and attempt to sort things out: find what are his intentions with you... Insinuate something about a long-term relationship turning into marriage, and observe his reactions... Keep pushing the note in this direction, giving only hints about life as a married couple (family, children, parenthood)... make him understand that this could last a lifetime... if he freaks out, then you'll have your answer... Take care !
2006-07-01 09:49:29 · answer #1 · answered by Restless 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Love creates a permanent relationship. A relationship may not always create Love. it may be just to fulfill our requirements.
If the guy is interested in you but doesn't love, there's no guarantee to that relation. if he has fallen every time he loved, doesn't mean that he can stand beside u, if he doesn't love u.
if u really want a long relationship with eachother, love will automatically devolop between both of you. All the best.
remember, if there's no love, its not a relation infact, its just an adjutment for a purpose. its just cheating ourself and convincing the gulty consciousness.
2006-07-01 16:35:43 · answer #2 · answered by rahulthesweet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you don't have to be inlove with each other to have a good relationship but it sure does help,but if he is saying that he does love you then give him time, if you really are in love with him like you say you are then you will give him time to get to where you are.I know he is saying that he doesn't want to fall in love but be honest who can say they can control who they fall in love with?, and then who knows while you are waiting on him you might just realize that you are not as in love with him as you thought you were and decide to move on yourself, i hope this helps you a little
2006-07-01 16:35:12 · answer #3 · answered by browneyedgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO .... it will last for a while depending on the sexual part of it but the relationship wont last .... its true .....even though your "in love" your only in love for a while !
2006-07-01 16:25:30 · answer #4 · answered by Andrea p 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes It just depends on how you two get along in terms of day to day stuff-- like do you like how he acts when he eats, sleeps, etc. ?
if you can stand his behaviors, even if they went to the extreme ( as you got older), would they not bother you? if they wouldn't, then the relationship will be fine. ask him what he thinks of your behaviors.
2006-07-01 16:24:59 · answer #5 · answered by seemeister 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋