Is it normal to go through mourning over 2 years later?? My husband died and I was ok, but now I am depressed

Answer 1

There are no rules or time-lines about how deep, how long, how much...where or when to experience grief from any loss (especially like your hubby). But what I do know, is never to resist it, and better yet, there is a reactive balance between the joy and depth of the relationship you'd shared and the depth of your grief. I recently lost my partner of 15 years, and what I found is my sense of loss was only outweighed by my profound gratitude for being so "lucky" to know someone so wonderful in such an intimate and life-altering way. How could I ever thank her for her bottomless love and goodness and unending patience with me?? How can I express how much she means to me and how profoundly she has helped me to change my life?

I don't know, except to take what she has given me, and turn right around to bless and love others. In considering that she had "graduated" on to something better (or at least different), I realised that I had too. But what could this be?

To be the Love that I admired and treasured with her -- In that, you or I can continue to feel our beloveds' kindness ever again. Your loving connection with your husband and friend is truly eternal, with you in every breath, every beam of sunshine, and every drop of rain.

And finally, the depression comes from holding it back. Go to where you and he experienced your greatest joys. You'll find him (and yourself) there.

Love & Light, my dear Friend!

Answer 2

Very normal. When my father suddenly died one morning (we'd spent 2 hours on the phone only 9 hours before and he was fine), I went through all the expected motions--except facing it. It took me far, far longer than 2 years later to realize the real grief and mourning I felt, and yes, I went through periods of incredible depression. I found out that there is no "normal" way of grieving, because every person is an individual and loves in their own unique way. Follow your heart and you will find your own peace.

Answer 3

If you went through normal grieving and then were OK for many months, but now find yourself going through it all over again, it's not normal, though it is understandable. This is sometimes called an "anniversary reaction", and it could possibly go away by itself, but often does not, and instead may get much worse. You should be seen by a psychotherapist who may be a psychologist, a psychiatrist, a psychiatric nurse or psychiatric social worker, and this type of depression may benefit tremendously from antidepressant medicine. I would not recommend that you be treated by your family doctor for this, unless you were also receiving psychotherapy from one of the above practitioners.

Answer 4

It's tough having to go through loss. Don't worry, it's quite normal to feel the way you just described. And just when we thought that we have gotten over with grief, here it comes again some time later, rebound emotions.

It is not comforting to tell someone who has just gone through an experience like this something like, "You'll get over with it soon, you'll meet someone," because that special someone in your life is irreplaceable.

However, notwithstanding rebound emotions, you may pick up the pieces and go on with your life, with the thought that you have been blessed to know and share with that special someone who is forever in your heart.

Answer 5

Yes I think it is normal. I can't imagine what it is like to loose a husband, but I have lost a sister and grandparents. I still miss them every now and then. Keep your chin up and think about the good times and special memories. Think about what he would want for you. Hope this helps alittle bit. Take care

Answer 6

AR gave you the best answer bar none....loosing your spouse is not the same as loosing your sister, grandparent, brother....while those losses are devastating as well.....until you loose your spouse you cannot begin to understand that sort of grief. I am sorry, my father passed away going on three years now and I have watched my mother on a roller coaster of emotions....follow the advice AR gave you. I'll pray for you. Good luck.

Answer 7

I am very sorry for your loss. My aunt has the same problem. I would say it would be normal, if it's not constant. Maybe you need to see your Dr.. He may recommend something to help you.
If you are religious, reading Psalms will help see you through this too. Hope you feel better soon. :)

Answer 8

im sorry for your loss and yes its normal i do it to i dont cry immediatly i cry after awhile try to get a kid tho by adopting or whatever it might help you to love someone else not a lover type person tho

Answer 9

I am so sorry. It is definitly normal to still morn his loss. Losing someone that close to you is not easy. God Bless!

Answer 10

Yes it is because you still feel that loss and I am sorry. Please talk to a counselor and find a support system.