can anyone give me creative ways to deal with crazy family members?

Question

you know, the one that no matter what you do, they always attempt to bring their drama into your life, and feel the need to cause as much trouble in your own personal life as possible, all the while thinking they are doing nothing wrong and don't understand why they are "persecuted" so much. if you have such a person in your family, how do you deal with them?

Answer 1

well, you play their game and switch it around so much til they can't understand where your coming from. i guess, how did you say it, " be as crazy at the situation calls for" and yes, sometimes you have to be more crazy with them, but push hard and don't give up. stress them out. do anything you can to freak them out and make them extremely upset, helps when they burst into tears and have to go. i hate linda, b!t*h.

Answer 2

Well i dont know if this is going to help you any but you can proly relate to it. My whole family seems to be crazy if you ask me. They have never ben supportve of my decisions and they will tell me str8 up that they are not excited about the things i am choosing to do at my wedding. I have 4 older sisters, i am the youngest. my dad is married to my step mom and she has a daughter. my dad has thrown the rest of us out as scraps. I dont get it at all. I wish i did. I am trying to find the best way to deal with them also. I dont know if the best thing to do is RUN.. lol like we would all love to do. Or if you should try and talk to them. like i try to do ... they dont listen. they are still always right. and all about themselfs and all about what my stepsister is doing .. she has always been better than me. always made my dad more happier. Can you help me? I hope that this helped you in some way. I am here to talk to you if you ever want to talk. If so.. i'll give you my yahoo name.GOOD LUCK <>< JEN

Answer 3

If you are old enough get a job save up some money go on vacation, find a house and job far away, don't go home and call and tell them that yoou are OK. Let tem know you are not coming back, don't give them an address or a phone number!!! Life will be much less stressful.

Answer 4

I had six of those people in my life---until I just "divorced" them from my life.

I grew up in a household where we were more like inmates in a POW camp than in a home. My father was alcoholic; my mother was psychotic and a control freak. We grew up with little or no coping skills--mostly survival skills.

To make a long story short, parents, brothers and sisters do not have to be in your life. Anyone who is costic to your life, anyone who is sucking up more energy than they are contributing does not have to be in your life. You have the choice. You can break the cycle.

Control freaks - Those who will use guilt, shame, and "the nice guy" type of manipulation in order to continue having influence in your life. "You can't do that right; I'll do it for you." "Don't do it that way, you're messing it up." Or if you are home for a holiday and you have your clothes folded in the suitcase a certain way and your sister or mother says, "I'll pack your bag for you before you leave--that's not what I taught you." As Barney Fife used to say----Nip it....Nip it in the bud! Just respond, "I like the way they are. Please stay out my suitcase." Of course, then, they'll turn into the "Martyr," which I describe later.

Drama Divas - Those who must have crises in their life in order to feel included or feel like people care about their feelings through the crises. When a Drama Diva's life starts to be too calm, too peaceful, and too smooth-flowing, they need to invent a crisis. This way, they get attention---although negative--and they can control those around them through the drama.

Co-Dependents - Those who need you to need them. If you get too self-reliant or too independent, these people go into spasms. They need you to need them to tell you how to dress, how to live, how to function in your daily life or they're not happy campers. "They can't live without my input; what will they do if I'm not supervising everything they're doing every minute of the day!?"

Example: You go home and tell the CODE (co-dependent) that you're doing great; job is good, house is good, relationship is good. The CODE says, "but you look thin; you're not eating right; your house isn't clean enough; can't you do better than the girlfriend we met last Thanksgiving?" blah blah blah.

Then you have THE MARTYR: The person who has to be the victim at every turn. There is nothing more costic to a family than the Martyr behavior. "Go ahead....take the blood from my veins...it's okay.....I'll die happy knowing I was giving you everything I had." "You're breaking my heart." "You're not the boy I raised!" "I gave my life to my children and this is how I'm treated???" My response to that: Get off the cross, Honey, someone else needs the wood.

You can do this. If you have people in your life that are sapping you strength, your thoughts, your health, and your mind----cut them loose. Tell them you have boundaries. They can either respect those boundaries, or they can go annoy someone else!

You're a grown up now---even though when you're around these people----as I did----you believe you're still 9 years old. You're not. You can do this and be a much healthier, happier, and more confident human being.

as Mel Gibson so aptly put it in Braveheart -------FREEEEEEEDOM!!!!!

Answer 5

I make boundaries known as to what subjects I am willing to discuss and what is acceptable behavior in my home. I limit my time with them and try to make whatever time I do have as pleasant as possible. The longer the contact goes on, the more potential for a disaster. I don't argue over my preferences but stick to pat answers such as "That's not acceptable in my home" or "It irriates me when you ..." I will also ask them kindly not to do a certain thing as in "Please I prefer that you do not smoke in my home." Lastly, I don't disclose much in my personal life unless I want to discuss it with them.

Answer 6

I make them understand what they are doing that I don't like and try to work with them from there I don't believe in running from my problems than they never get resolved and you would always wonder what life would be like with them, they could turn out to be your best friends Good Luck

Answer 7

I don't answer the phone and YES I do have a person like that if I explained the whole story, it would take up all your spacew so I won't. She never comes over so there is no problem there but if you can move do so.

Answer 8

I don't, I moved 100 miles away and occasionally talk to them on the phone or through e-mail or by letter. Life is peaceful.

Answer 9

take a good antidepressant, cut the worst of the crazys completely off, dont tell them anything negative about your life(allthough they will love you more temporarily if you have negative things in your life), well, i'll stop before I take up too much space

Answer 10

RUN AWAY! Tell them you deserve honesty and you have lost your appitite for "whining" children/relatives. Or even better: put on crazy costumes, act totally nuts, and see if you can make them uncomfortable enough to leave you alone.

Answer 11

I try to ignore them and don't tell them anything about whats going on in my life (maybe not the best thing to do but i figure they have less "ammunition" that way ;) )