How do you get your toddler to be disciplined and well-behaved?

Question

I want to raise my child disciplined and well-behaved NOW so when he gets older he'll won't be so spoiled and disobedient. I've noticed there are many toddlers that are more spoiled than others.

Answer 1

You have to be consistent. One of my biggest pet peeves is when a parent says no but if the child begs,whines or throws a big enough fit they change their mind to get the child to stop. In my house no means NO and if you act up to try and get your way after you have gotten a no all that will get you is trouble DEFINITELY not a yes. In cases where I do not know how I feel about a situation and it might be a no now but could possibly change then it is a maybe not a yes or a no.
It is never too early to start teaching children the rules of your household and what is expected of them while at home and while out.
Of course toddlers do not understand all the concepts but if you are consistent in enforcing the rules they will be quick to catch on.
Talk to them. Explain why you have certain rules and boundaries. And why you say no or yes or maybe. They need to have an understanding and just disciplining isn't going to make them understand.

Answer 2

Well I personally think that doing nothing is the worst thing you can do for a child. When you do nothing they begin to realize that nothing will happen when they behave badly, and then they begin to act like that in front of other people, because nothing happens.

And to say that spanking is not the answer is completely ignorant. Spanking helps the child more than you know. But it's borderline child abuse that we have to watch out for.

Look at me, I was spanked as a child, mostly because I was really stubborn and rude, like once I remember hitting some lady and I wouldn't say sorry for anything, but it was only by my father spanking my hand that I finally did say it. I learned that I had to be polite in order to not get spanked, plus I got many hugs in the process.

So I think mild spanking with positive inforcement is the way to go. You might disregard my answer because I'm only a teen. But I assure you, I didn't turn out warped or having repressed anger. I'm an honor roll student who has big dreams in life.

Answer 3

Whatever you do you must be consistent. You must not give in on things like time outs or taking toys away or any method. Example if you take a toy away, you should keep it away for a few days or a week and not a few hours. Keep the same consequences for the same behaviors. Examples: talking back always equals a time out. Throwing a ball in the house after you said "no" always equals the ball being taken away. Let your daughter know the rules before you discipline her. Keep it simple: "Don't throw the ball in the house." Also, don't give in to temper tantrums. Giving a treat, or toy to calm a tantrum only teaches him that's a good way to get a treat or toy.

Also start teaching things like "Pick up your toys" and have easy places for him to put his toys away. Even if he can only pick up the little toys. You can do it together and make it a game, this will help him learn it isn't so bad to have to help with house as he gets older. Also start teaching please and thank you. Whenever you give a cookie you say "Please may I have a cookie," and as he learns to talk he can build up from "please cookie" and so on. Then "Thank you" when you give him what he wants. This always works by example. Just him observing you saying please and thank you will help teach good behavior.

Answer 4

Start early- not necessarily just punishing. Discipline is a mixture of both praise and punishment used when necessary.

*Praise is necessary. Always be sure to praise when they've done something you want. There has to be a distinct feeling from praise than disappointment.

*Being consistent is very important. It is the most common reason why discipline fails. If you're not consistent, your child will not connect action to reaction, and he'll learn that his actions do not always lead to a reaction from you. Also, both parents (or whoever is involved) need to be on the same page, and be sure to back each other up in front of the child. "Hey, Dad said no. Mom says no, too!"

*Give a reason to why you said no. If he's always being told no without representation, than what has he learned? It boils down to "Because Mommy and Daddy said so." What kid thinks that is a good enough reason? If you tell him "Don't touch the stove. It's hot and you'll get burned," and he does it anyway- he'll connect what you said to what he experienced when touching a hot stove. "Hey, mom was right!"

*Try to give him a choice- when throwing tantrums. When your child throws a tantrum, try asking "Do you want to play (like you were) or do you want to go to time out?" Usually, he'll pick playing over a time out. If he keeps crying, follow through with your discipline method. This also depends on the type of tantrum. A lot of tantrums just come with toddler territory, so it's best to try avoiding them happening in the first place. Take cues from your child, and try to redirect for a "normal" tantrum. If he's doing it because he didn't get what he wanted, that's when time-out comes into play.

*Always let them know the consequences beforehand. Give warnings, but only once per action. Let them know what will happen if they don't behave- then follow through.

*Always explain why he was put in time-out (or whatever method you use) after you take him out.

*And don't use time-out (or whatever you choose) as the single consequence to their action. Yes, they went to time-out for throwing the magnets off the fridge when they were having a tantrum. But now, after they've calmed down, they have to pick them up and put them back.

Keep them busy with age-appropriate activities and "chores." Kids function better with a routine. Even "helping" around the house is possible. Hand him a paper towel and he can dust, and clean. Whenever he makes a mess while eating, hand him the towel to clean it up. Of course you'll have to come back to redo it, but he'll learn to clean up after himself. Have him put his toys back when he is done playing. He'll only learn to do what you expect of him.

Answer 5

I disagree that toddlers don't understand time outs they just need to be done properly 1 min for each year in the child's age seems to do it for me just make sure it is a time out no toys or other entertainment and save talking about why they are in time out until after also spanking never caused me any lasting harm generally once a child has been spanked they remember it and you can just tell them these actions will result in spanking these with time outs and here are the reasons why. if you explain to your child even if they are very young it will help them understand why the action is not allowed and help them learn empathy (IE if i do this my parent feels____ and that is not good)
keep in mind kids are kids and need to be reminded of what is not allowed try to keep the rules simple as possible and be CONSISTENT

Answer 6

You don't. Let your little one do what he or she wants (within reason) and smile. When a tantrum starts, sit down in front of her and say nothing. Smile unless the child is in imminent danger of harming itself or breaking things. If there are "things" that are breakable, move them higher. Move "things" out of the way, don't move or restrain the child. Wait. The child will gradually get to recognize that bad behavior will get nothing in return. Don't scold. Don't say, "no." Check the impulse to be dictatorial. Of course, this assumes that you're talking about a child who is less than 6 years old. When the child gets to be a young person of about 13, this starts all over again. By that time, however, the child will realize that poor behavior is not the answer. Leadership is the only approach. Punishment is not a good idea. Never strike a child. If you're an adult and you can't figure out a way to steer a child in the right direction without physical punishment you may have to reconsider parenthood.

Answer 7

A tap on the rear end when the child is acting inappropriately will do it. So will a strong voice. Toddlers are too young to understand the concept of "time outs". Good luck.

Answer 8

Make sure you play with your kids too. Many people over-discipline their kids so that it really ends up being the only interaction that they have with them. If you hang out with your kids and are relaxed with them, your kids will pick up on this vibe. No joking, I think that the show The Dog Whisperer (on TLC) has great advice for parents too not just dog owners.

Answer 9

Boundaries! Consequences! Consistency! Lesson Learning! Boundaries...Boundaries...Boundaries!

Answer 10

Spanking