I need help my son is 6 and has ADHD but i refuse to use there meds. for him.?

Question

However my issue is that i have tried everything with him to make him listen. I have tried spanking,taking things away, making him write, standing in the corner,sitting him in timeout. i have tried everything that i know about and nothing is working Please i need some advise!!

Answer 1

The meds aren't a cure-all, and no one thinks they are. They are one way of "taking the edge off." I respect your decision not to use meds. As an adult sufferer of ADHD myself, I avoided the meds for a long time. I finally got on them as part of a study, and I did find that I seemed to function better with them.

However, I'm not trying to convince you to use them. The most important thing with ADHD is for you to modify your expectations of your son. Punishing him for behaving differently is NOT going to change things. You need to understand that he will NEVER meet "typical" expectations. The best thing that you can do is to learn everything about ADHD behavior, and be prepared to make accommodations for it. When you ask him to do something, EXPECT that he will get distracted, and EXPECT that you will have to remind him of what he's supposed to do several times. Come up with ways that you can keep reminding him of what he is supposed to be doing right now. Praise the completion of something...completion of ANYTHING is a big deal for ADHD.

What's happening is that while he's supposed to be focusing on one thing, there are 100 things going on in his head. The good news is, he's probably going to turn out to be a genius. The bad news is, he's going to be very very frustrating for you unless you learn all about ADHD, and its afffects, both on the person with ADHD and the people who live with them.

Good luck! You've got your hands full!

Answer 2

I had 5 kids with ADHD so I researched it. The first thing you need to do is to get him started on folic acid that is one vitamin that is not in his system. I do not remember the other ones. The second find a doctor if possible that does not believe in medicine and get an appointment. 3 What the doctor most likely NOT tell you is that with ADHD there are 2 other problems that are attached to ADHD and that is OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANCE & CONDUCT DISORDER. these 2 are more often than not also part of your son's ADHD. Two of my 5 had these to deal with as well. I know that you may not want to put your son on meds but you may have to once school starts BECAUSE the school staff will not be able to deal with him and will call CPS on you if you do not. The best med out there is striterra or a lot of caffine. Counciling as well.

Answer 3

He has ADHD of course none of those things are working. He can't control his behaviour. Why are you trying to make his life so hard for him. In my kids year level there is a boy with adhd and odd he is not on medication either. Do you know what life is like for him(also 6)? Hell!! He has 1 friend, he doesn't get invited to any parties, no-one wants to sit next to him, he is in the bottom reading group , he spends alot of time at the principles office or being sent home as his behaviour is so bad. What type of life is this for a kid. The psychological damage will outway any side effects of medication. There are so many out there that have been used for so long. If you truly do not want to do medication talk to the paediatrician about other alternatives. Use google and research that way as well as in here. I wish your son luck

Answer 4

My sons are ADHD and one also has oppositional defiant disorder. I've tried everything as well. They are on medication and have improved greatly. It takes more than medication though I have to say. I have a psychologist talking to both of them. We are doing a behavior chart. I had an issue with the medication, I didn't want my kids to be zombies. The Doc said that if the dosage is the right dosage they won't be zombies. There is a possibility that they can grow out of it. I put my kids on medication because I did not want my kids grow thinking that they were bad kids. They were getting in trouble a lot, not just at home but at school as well. My kids are great kids. I also did it so that they could do well at school. Talk to your pediatrician and see what can be done. Research ADHD and cut back on sugar. Good luck

Answer 5

If your son need meds for an asthma, you wouldn't hesitate to give it to him, right? He'd need it to survive and be successful in life and you wouldn't want to see him suffer. ADHD meds help your child survive in the educational setting and be able to find success. If he can not focus in school and can not complete activities and assignments or can not get along with other students, he can't be successful. and he does suffer: constant reprimand from teachers, other students who don't want to get into trouble will eventually start avoiding him, stigma that he can't control himself.

I know you want him to be successful and thrive. Think of it that way.

Now if you think he is not truly ADHD, talk to his doc and try something else. There are many other things that can mimic ADHD, like high intelligence that is not being served. Food allergies. Dislike of school or the teacher.

But your behavior is teaching him a terrible habits by not making him take the meds: (1) that he doesn't have to do anything he doesn't want to do (2) the advice and prescribe medications given by medical professionals can be ignored -- think about the future: high blood pressure, cholestrol issues.. the list can go on forever (3) his behavior at school is not really that important.

Answer 6

My daughter has adhd and we use concerta for her, I was against the meds at first, but wow what a change in her behavior and her grades and her personality. You need a really good doctor that will monitor the child frequently for results and side affects, it took us 7 months to find the right dosage for our daughter, our Dr. started out with the lowest dose possible and slowly worked up until we achieved the results we need, she is now an a/b student going into the sixth grade, we started this in the first grade, she was a c/d student then. ADHD can be caused by a chemical imbalance that can only be fixed by the medications, yelling, spanking and such just doesn't work with this type of disorder. good luck

Answer 7

You probably won't like my answer, but here goes. I am a teacher and have seen many children that have ADHD. Some were mis-diagnosed and the problem was a lack of effective discipline, but for children who truly have ADHD, medication is the only route that helped the problem. There are several different meds out there now. You need to talk to your doctor to see the side-effects and which one would be best for your son. The situation will continue to get worse and his education will suffer due to the symptoms he has. The school will appreciate your efforts.

Answer 8

Meds are NOT the final answer. Look at his diet for one, google sites that discuss ADHD and diet issues. Also, a lot of kids have been mis-diagnosed with ADHD when they are actually suffering from sleep apnea. Make sure he's sleeping well. Also, people are too quick to throw ADHD into the mix, kids are kids. Schools these days want any kids that isn't a drone in the classroom to be medicated. Be your child's advocate and don't give in! Good luck!

Answer 9

You are trying to correct things behaviorally when your son has physical issues. It's like trying to get someone over diabetes by saying suck it up and get over it. Is there lifestyle things that diabetics need to do. Yes. Is it enough for most? No. They need meds.

I agree that too many children are given meds to make the school year easier. However, if he is truly ADHD, then that is different. Yes there are lifestyle things that can help. But ADHD is not just a behavior issue. If the underlying biological issues are not addressed, you are simply dooming him to failure.

You have tried everything else. I think that it is time to reconsider the meds.

Answer 10

OK, first, who diagnosed him? The school or his pediatrician? My son's teachers tried this crap with me. His pediatrician feels he acts just like a 7 year old boy should act. Kids aren't robots meant to sit on command for long periods of time.
Second, stop punishing him all the time for it. He can't help it most of the time and he will start feeling like it is his fault.
What I've found that works is that I set a timer and tell my son that I expect "X" amount of work done in "X" amount of time. I make sure he understands what I expect of him and that he understands the assignment. He knows that if he takes longer, then that time is deducted from his fun stuff like video games or playing with his friends. I also made it clear to his teacher that any work he doesn't finish at school I want sent home for him to finish.
I commend you for sticking to the no medication. Being a bit hyper(I am the same way) isn't a medical problem and shouldn't be treated as such.

Answer 11

There person above who claims ADHD doesn't exist is wrong. It is true that there are cases where parents medicate in place of good parenting, but there are kids who really have ADHD. Think of it like treating depression or anxiety or any other disorder. There is no reason not to use meds if your child has been officially diagnosed. If nothing else works, then use what you have available. It will make your life and his so much better. School will be easier and his social skills will improve. You will find that it is not drugging your child -- it doesn't make kids lethargic. It makes them able to cope.