I am worried about our relationship. I think he is a little hurt and upset with me because he needs a new computer and he asked me lastnight to open a compaq account and he would pay the monthly charge. He doesn't have the credit to do it himself. I am not worried about if he'll pay or not because I know he will pay, but what has me worried is I just don't want to start feeling like he is more concerned with getting things from me. He treats me very sweet and I hate feeling like this, but I don't want this relationship to be about material things. Maybe i'm just afraid he is just trying to get something from me, i don't know what to think or feel at this point, but I feel so sad and lost. I don't want to lose him over this. Can anyone offer me some advice?
2006-06-09 04:30:39 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, let this be a test. Open the account for him, and when he pays you back see if he'll expect more things from you in return. I'm sorry, but this is the only way you're going to find out anything. That's what relationships are all about---taking chances and making profound discoveries. You won't learn anything about yourself or your partner if you're worrying all the time and you're doing nothing about it.
Aria
*The illnovelist*
2006-06-09 04:34:00 · answer #1 · answered by illnovelist 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh man...thats some serious predicament u got there. I think one way you can solve this problem is getting into a guy's point of view. i dont know about your boyfriend, but if I were in his case I would probably have done it because I wouldnt want you to think that if I wanted something or if I had a problem, the first person i would confide to is another person. And not because I just want to make our relationship all bout material things.
You know, like you're the person closest to him and so he comes to you first. Besides, at least it was a show on his part that he knows where his incapabilities are and is not egoistic enough to not ask you for a little help when he knows he needs it, since you said that he promised to pay for it and you trust him to.
Have you ever talked to him about it? I think maybe you can take some time to carefully, slowly tell him how you feel about the situation because if he's really that sweet, perfect guy who knows how to handle you and cares for you with all his heart, i dont think he would ask of you such thing because of materialsm. As in, obviously, if you have been together for one year now, he probably values the relationship as much as you do and will not want to lose it over such a petty thing too.
I think you should see it more positively and an opportunity to strenghten your relationship. Love+peace (:
2006-06-09 11:45:19 · answer #2 · answered by cedric t 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't open the account for him. You're not married! If he's willing to make payments, he's willing to save the money and pay cash. It's that simple. And for his borthday / christmas, you can give him some help with funds for it. If he can't get the credit for himself, there must be a reason. don't let whatever that reason is, become a burden on your credit. Seen too many people's courts and Judge Mathis shows. If, for whatever warped reasons you decide to do it anyway. Get it in writing. That he will pay the bill and any and all interest charges / late fees and penalties. Make him sign an agreement!!!!! If he's not willing to sign an agreement for you. Then you shouldn't be signing one for him / opening an account. But you're in love and he's really such a sweet guy that you're gonna do it anyway. Don't say I didn't tell you so.
2006-06-09 11:40:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
for you to be concerned about it, and question him tells me there is more to the story than you are saying. You guys have been together for almost and year and you think opening a account for him is gonna turn your relationship into a materialistic one? I don't understand sorry. Its not like your paying for it. but his you don't trust him DON' T DO IT
2006-06-09 11:38:32 · answer #4 · answered by Sandra 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think in this case you shouldn't be thinking that he is using you, instead be happy that he is coming to you, his other half, for help. You say it's a need and not a want. This is what couples do for each other. If you guys are living together I don't see why not.
2006-06-09 11:36:03 · answer #5 · answered by sexzbich 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON"T do it! please take it from me, tell him to ask a family member or another friend, just tell him you don't want that to be on your credit, he doesn't have the credit for a reason, i'm sure he's a great guy, but you guys are not married and its not your responsibility, please take this advice, you'll be glad you did
2006-06-09 11:34:50 · answer #6 · answered by AFwife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you needto talk to him and this will be his test and if he fails this then you'll know what kind of guy he is and hwat he wanted
2006-06-09 11:34:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't do it you will get stuck paying the bill!
2006-06-09 11:34:28 · answer #8 · answered by golferwhoworks 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋