What can I do?

Question

I'm 17 and I'm suffering from some really bad depression. I can't be happy about anything, and I honestly know something just isn't right with me. My parents think the whole psychiatry and medicine thing is BS, so I'm forced to deal with it on my own. I don't have anyone to talk to here, and I'm tired of not being listened to. I don't have any close friends, my parents have their own problems, and I'm in an extremely tough place. It gets harder and harder everyday to get out of bed and want to to do anything productive. I'm always tired, I eat too much and unhealthily, and my moods are always in the pits. I'm at the end of my rope and I just think I'm too young to have all of this on my shoulders. What can I do?

There's really no way I can get to a doctor without my parents knowing...

Answer 1

First of all, depression is nothing to take lightly (whether your 17 or 75). Reading what you wrote, something is wrong, even if you’re not sure what it is, it needs to be dealt with. Your “mental health” is just as important as your physical health. There are generally two components to good mental health, one is chemical and the other is psychological.

There are many forms of depression, but only a medical professional can really diagnose and treat. Generally, medication works well with counseling. There are many medications, and it will take some time to “fine-tune”. But only a medical professional can get you on something so that you can begin functioning (if warranted).

Here’s the most important thing, do not keep this to yourself. If you’re in school talk to a school counselor, teacher, someone that can be trusted (relative/minister/priest)! Do you have a primary doctor you see for your annual physicals? Do whatever you can to get yourself in front of him/her. Sometimes you may need a professional to assist you with dealing with (talking to) your parents to get you in front of the right professional.

Do you keep a journal? Write down and document what’s going on with you from day to day.

Whatever you do, do not “self-medicate”!

What does that mean?

NO drugs (illegal or legal - without a prescription), no alcohol!

Also, if you don’t get the appropriate help, you may act out in “self-destructive” ways.

Examples: dropping out of school, hanging around the wrong crowd, getting bad advice, bad and escalating confrontations with your parents, etc…

I read some of the previous posts, all interesting ideas (hobbies, diet, exercise, meditation, prayer/divine intervention, friends, “toughing it out”, herbs, yada yada yada). And yes, I personally do all these things on a daily basis. Together, all very holistic, but if you “can’t get out of bed” you are not “functioning”. If you're not functioning you won’t do any of it. Everyone is unique, what works for one person may not work for you (don’t get me wrong, they certainly won’t hurt; they are good and healthy habits). I’ll give you an example, if something is “out of balance”, I don’t care how much exercise you do, your depression may not really go away. It may just mask the real problem for a short period of time. The person(s) who suggested this, is referring to the releasing of endorphins, a natural brain chemical that can influence your mood. Mood is just one aspect of “mental health”.

Mental health is an ongoing process. There are two things you need to be aware of

1) knowing when something is wrong (as opposed to what), and
2) reaching out for help.

Please, please, please get in front of someone that will listen and assist you in getting the right help (whether counseling and/or medication). You still have a lot of living and growing up to do.

Also, one last thing, be kind to yourself!

Answer 2

Is there a relative, priest, minister, or friend you can talk to. Do you have a free clinic for depression nearby. Is there a place listed in the paper or phonebook where depressed annonymous meets. Call your local hospital and ask them. I know what depression is, have been suffering with it for over 35 years. Exercise will release the chemicals in your brain that will make you feel better. Exercise is the best remedy without medication. Then you have to push yourself to do things that will make you happy. Make friends, you have to be a friend to have a friend. Stop eating unhealthy things. Exercise instead. You are tired because you are depressed but if you can just push yourself a little each day to do something (go for a walk, dance in your room to a favorite song, go to the movies or watch a comedy on TV, etc.) you have control over your life, don't let it control you. Make up your mind to just do one thing everyday that involves exercise of some kind, then when you feel better do 2 things a day. Just keep pushing yourself. You will lose weight and feel better too. Give it a try.

Answer 3

As a teenager, having these feelings is normal, so not to worry.

Perhaps, it will be good if you pick up a hobby or do volunteer work, as these activities can help to ease the tension that you are going through and improve your self-esteem.

Try prayer. Look for ways through your own religion or faith, from which you can seek answers to your existing problem.

Meditation and breathing exercises are also good techniques to resolve your depression and heal your negative feelings. They will get the mind and body connected.

Answer 4

U say u don't have close friends. Probably u should try looking for friends who share the same interest like u. U can try any extracurricular activity, like singing or dancing,painting or any other activities u like.Join a class where they teach stuffs like these. This way u will be in the company of like-minded friends.
I am sure ur parents will not disallow this. In these way u'll be out the problems u face in home and have more friends whom u can share ur thoughts.

Answer 5

You have taken the first step to dealing with your problems by acknowledging them. You really need to see a doctor as you may need medication. If you do don't be afraid of it. You are in a tough place but I think you can get out of it. Try drinking plenty of water and trying some deep breathing exercises. Maybe when you eat the unhealthy food take a minute to listen to your body. Feel whether or not you are hungry or not feeling well. It is quite possible the food you are eating is making your problems worse. You really need someone you can confide in who will listen to you. I know where you are and what ways it can go as I have been there. Please write if there is anything more I can do. Take care of yourself and be positive you have more strength than you realise.

Answer 6

First of all, people who think that psychiatry that is "BS" usually need it themselves! Unless you have a serious mental health issue (requiring meds) you don't need a psychiatrist, you need to see a counselor for talk therapy to see what the root of your depression might be.

Next, check what you are eating, you need to watch sugar and carbs., those can make depression worse. And don't drink any alcohol either.

Make sure you get some sunlight every day, take a walk (you need exercise to boost the endorphins in your brain to feel better.

You need to get help on your own if your parents aren't going to help you out here. Take the responsibility to call a mental health clinic and ask for a counselor to speak to soon. They operate on a sliding scale so you can afford it. Also there is free counseling at churches usually too. There is also a free counselor on MySpace under Christian Counselor--but I think you need to speak to someone at least once a week for a session (50 minutes each).

Take care of yourself, get the help you need sweetie. I will be praying for you.

Answer 7

Ur right u are to young to have these problems, have u tried calling a crisis worker at at your nearest hospital and explaining to them the situation? maybe they can talk some sence into ur parents! I feel for u, im a parent with a 16 yr old. You need to keep talking to someone that will help, someone will hear u and help u out, dont give up, ur to young, if u believe in God, ask him for strength, he will help u. Meditate in him, have faith sweety, ill keep u in my prayers!

Answer 8

Go to anyone (adult, like counselor or nurse or even a teacher or librarian) at your school who you feel comfortable with. School staff have plenty of training to help you get in touch with a professional. In our town they put my son and I in touch with the local social services therapist, who was a really big help to us.

Also, I believe you're probably old enough to go and see your doctor without a parent. The doctor could also refer you, as well as talk to your parents.

It's unfortunate if you have to start off on your own looking for help, but hopefully your parents will become supportive with some assistance from professionals. The fact that you're trying to get help is an important step in the right direction.

Answer 9

I am sorry about your situation. Are you sure you can't get to a doctor?
I'll assume you can't and offer some suggestions.

1 Exercise has been proven to help depression as much or more than medication. It doesn't need to be strenuous. Slow and long is better than strenuous and short. A half hour of walking, a swim, half an hour of dancing to music you like or jumping rope, all are easy and can help you. Another exercise to look into is Qi Gong, it's simple and gentle and helps balance the energy in your body so you feel better. Yoga will do the same. You can get these on DVD or tape to do at home.

2 Herbs! Herbs and diet can help a lot. St Johns wort, soy milk or tofu, or soy isoflavone capsules, will help. Go to your health food store and ask the workers there, they'll have several recommendations for you.

3) By choosing to exercise, get some herbs and by asking for help, you are taking control of your life, That feeling of taking control, and of hope for the future, will help most of all. You aren't alone, though you feel lonely right now. Keep making little steps and have hope for the future, this will change and you WILL feel better. I promise!