Help im trying to help my boyfriend see his son?but the mom wont let him?

Question

To make a long story as short as i can my fiance has as 4 year old son with his ex..they havent been together for over 1 1/2 but she is making life in possible for him. She wants 500.00 a month on child support plus wants him to have him everyweekend, and i know
for a fact a judge wouldnt give her that much.
i really love his son and i love having his son around,, and i know how happy he gets when he has him. She has a restaring order on him and she calls him and is harrssing me who knows how she got my cell#. Well anyways im scared that she will call and get him locked up. She wants him back now that she see thats hes happy and that were having baby it kills her and that he is doing so well. even though she has a man.She dosent want to go through court and i know thats what he needs to do cuz shes gonna ended up coming between me and him and i dont want that.. What can i do to help him with getting vistation rights over his son and even maybe getting custdoy of. The only thing is that hes on parol and probation ... for the stupidest reason but anyways ... how can i he just doenst want to argue and he dont want me to stress... ??He wants me to find info for him but thats why i came here lol.. but can some one please help me.. i dont want to be the cause of him not seeing his son and i dotn want her to be the reason me and him brake up cuz we have a baby coming soon

Answer 1

He needs to consult with an attorney, simple as that. It is rather sad when women use their children to be manipulative. Being on parole doesn't make him a bad parent. He needs to sue for at least joint custody. The judge will award child support based on his income, not based on what she wants. Trying to be cordial with her doesn't seem like it will work, its time to get the courts involved.

Good luck

Answer 2

Go file for custody and child support from her. You can both take parenting and cpr courses which will help you in court, but also teach you things you might not know. Make sure you document conversations with her.

Answer 3

$500.00 a month for child support of a four-year-old? That is a bargain at ANY price!!

Food, preschool, heat, hot water, rent, clothes for a growing child, etc. That is NOT a lot to ask at ALL!

Also...she has a restraining order against this man? And he is on parole? And the court gave HER full custody? And he has another child on the way from a woman he hasn't bothered to marry?

It sounds to me that this man...may be a good man..but may need to do some self reflection and get his life in order. Does he have a job? Is he eligible for education programs? Does he treat you well? Does he have a home that is safe and clean and a good environment for his two children?

Maybe, until he can say yes to all of those questions, he should not seek custody..but just supervised visitation rights. I am sure an attorney in your county can help with that. And I think, unless this man is a danger to the child, that few judges would refuse a request from a man wanting to be a Daddy to his child under the strictest of circumstances. It shows a desire to be part of the childs life..and an attempt to be a responsible adult and model for that child.

Good Luck to you all!

Answer 4

He needs a lawyer and needs to go before the courts. get a journal and document everything she says and does. When there is a witness to these actions have them sign the journal as a witness., Any thing that you can do to get the courts to see how manipulative and rotten she really is will help in your defense. Document everything every call every conversation . the date time and location. courts love documents. even document everything the child says he heard her say. Be careful not to put words into the child's mouth but only write down the facts. Make sure your man is drug free and you have nothing to hide from the law or the system. live a good clean straight life and you have nothing to fear or hide. turn all of her attacks back at her with documentation of everything that happened. get witnesses every chance you get.Get a lawyer and get to court. You need that restraining order lifted. do not let him do anything stupid. she is trying to provoke him into acting rashly so she comes out the winner. Take video tapes when possible to show her evil disposition. pictures speak a thousand words. in short cover your @ss. don't let her get to you. Out smart her and out think her. remember what goes around comes around. If you act reasonable and she doesn't the courts will see this. She sounds very manipulative so you have to be very careful.Be smart about it. don't let her pull you into her web of deceit.

Answer 5

You need an attorney. Call one that concentrates in family law.

Answer 6

You will just have to get a lawyer to answer these uestions based on his situation. The fact that he is in probation may hurt him. This is why you need a lawyer. Remember that the woman in question does not want to deal or is willing to make any compromises so, there is nothing you can do since she will not yield. With a good lawyer, she will have to give him visitation rights whether she likes it or not. Failure to do so will end up very badly for her. However, woman usually have more rights when it comes tokids. I would not give her the $500. Have the court appoint the right amount. However, the amount could be higher. Most important of all keep record of everything. Take a legal notebook and note down all occurances. If he takes the kids to dinner write down where and when. If she calls your home make a record of that. I think recording conversations is ilegal but there might be a way to confirm that it was her that make the call. Stuff of that nature.

Important thing about the notebook is that it has to be of a certain type and it has to be written in a certain color ink to be admisible in court. So, research on that. Remember, every event must be writen down with dates and time and eye witnesses.

I have a co worker who went through a nasty divorce and his ex has pull plenty of stunts trying to make life miserable for him. HE has spent a lot of money in layer fees but it seems that thats the only way to make it fair for him. She have even throwned fits abut him turning around in her drive way on the day he pick up the kids. Those tings however are not punisheable by law. So, don't expect to get resolution for every stupid thing that happens.

Answer 7

He needs to go to court to have everything spelled out in regards to visitation and child support. Once that is done, a major source of the ongoing arguments can be resolved so the poor little boy who's stuck in the middle can have some peace. As for you, you should change your cell phone number and try to stay out of the bickering as much as possible while emotionally supporting your boyfriend and concerning yourself with your new baby.

Answer 8

He needs to involve the court, they will set the child support amount and visitation, if she breaks the court order she will in contempt. Call a lawyer and find out what he needs to do. The all offer a free consultation.

Answer 9

My brother fought for and won full custody of his son. It is a very rare thing for a father to get full custody but visitation should be easier.

First of all, document everything! Everytime she calls and harasses you or him, write down the date and time she called and what was said. If she comes to see you, write down date and time and what happened. Anytime anything with her happens, write down date, time and what happened. You can use these in court to establish a pattern of activity.

Contact a lawyer to at least see what his rights are. Since you are not going to be able to resolve this one your own, you will have to get the law involved at some point.

You should not be the reason he cannot see his son. Unless you are causing harm to him, you are not involved.

good luck

Answer 10

he just needs to take her to court. she cant argue with the court orders. if the judge decides that he can see the boy, then thats what goes and it has to be when the judge says.and if she does not cooperate she can go to jail!! as far as child support goes, it depends on how much he makes, and they do take into consideration if he has other kids to support (your pregnant right?) if you guys wanted to you could go for joint custody where the boy is with you one week and his mom the next week, the you would nt pay child support cause everything is even. Good luck!!