A man decides to have a face-lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the results. On his way home, he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.
Before leaving, he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"
"About 35," was the reply.
"I'm actually 47," the man says, feeling really happy.
After that, he goes into McDonalds for lunch and asks the clerk the same question.
The reply is, "Oh, you look about 29".
"I am actually 47."
Later, while standing at a bus stop, he asks an old woman the same question.
She replies, "I am 85 years old, and my eyesight is going. But when I was young, there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with your balls for 10 minutes, I will be able to tell you your exact age."
As there was no one around, the man thinks, What the hell and lets her slip her hand down his pants.
Ten minutes later, the old lady says, "Okay, it's done. You are 47."
Stunned, the man says, "That was brilliant. How did you do that?"
The old lady replies, "I was behind you at McDonalds."
2007-12-31 02:27:14 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
gotta love dirty old ladies!
2007-12-31 02:37:22 · answer #1 · answered by CC 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I agree with jeff....that was pee-funny!!!! Thanks for the laugh!!
2007-12-31 13:26:25 · answer #2 · answered by territizzyb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry but that is not funny
2007-12-31 07:58:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LMAO!!! Though I wonder, how did an 85 yr old lady beat him to the bus stop?
2007-12-31 06:03:21 · answer #4 · answered by Mako 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG!! the old lady got some explaining to do! :D
2007-12-31 03:18:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
cool!!
2007-12-31 03:16:30 · answer #6 · answered by police 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
star---curious that none of the people who were "laughing their assets off' thought to give you a star
2007-12-31 03:07:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
LOL
2007-12-31 03:00:25 · answer #8 · answered by MEETOO 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ooouu!! Naughty, Naughty!! LOL.
2007-12-31 02:37:12 · answer #9 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, I don't find that funny.
2007-12-31 02:32:06 · answer #10 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 5⤋
Friggin' hilarious! I love it!
2007-12-31 02:30:50 · answer #11 · answered by Scotty Doesnt Know 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋